What Pisses Me Off
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I have been doing a lot of driving in the last few days racking up kilometres on the freeway. This has exposed me to some of the biggest waste of body parts on the face of the earth. Fuckwits who have somehow gained a license and have since failed to kill themselves. The pricks who shit me the most are those driving slow in the overtaking lane. By slow I mean slower than me and not necessarily below the speed limit. Next on the list are those who get in to the overtaking lane to get past a slower car just as you are approaching both of them. They are probably going 5-10 km/h faster than the slow car while I am going 20-40 km/h faster. This forces me to brake and wait for them to inch past. If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
We have an annual phenomenon called "Snowbird" that migrates here each winter. These are slow-moving, inattentive old people navigating 40' recreational vehicles on our narrow streets at half the posted speed. They come from Canada and the northern US to escape the cold at home, and generally make life miserable for all with their complete lack of driving skills. These odd creatures will blithely stare straight into the eyes of an oncoming driver doing the posted 45 mph, wait until he's 25' away, then pull out onto the highway in front of him without so much as a nod. They initiate u-turns from the right hand lane, without benefit of turn signals, and brake for hallucinations. The city promotes this as "Tourism" though all they contribute to the community is mayhem; they are best known for their shoplifting skills. Being on fixed incomes, they are too cheap to pay retail, so often help themselves to their own version of a senior discount. I've never been inside one of their RVs, but I can only assume that they don't come with plumbing. I surmise that personal hygiene is not a high priority to these people, judging by their slovenly appearance, and the odors that permeate the casinos across the river while they're perched here. Fortunately, Spring is here, and the homeward migration has begun. Life is, once again, good.
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I have been doing a lot of driving in the last few days racking up kilometres on the freeway. This has exposed me to some of the biggest waste of body parts on the face of the earth. Fuckwits who have somehow gained a license and have since failed to kill themselves. The pricks who shit me the most are those driving slow in the overtaking lane. By slow I mean slower than me and not necessarily below the speed limit. Next on the list are those who get in to the overtaking lane to get past a slower car just as you are approaching both of them. They are probably going 5-10 km/h faster than the slow car while I am going 20-40 km/h faster. This forces me to brake and wait for them to inch past. If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
Michael Martin wrote: If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. If this becomes available for any vehicle I say we just modify it to fit any car and then a lot of people will be happy. :) Nick Parker
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I have been doing a lot of driving in the last few days racking up kilometres on the freeway. This has exposed me to some of the biggest waste of body parts on the face of the earth. Fuckwits who have somehow gained a license and have since failed to kill themselves. The pricks who shit me the most are those driving slow in the overtaking lane. By slow I mean slower than me and not necessarily below the speed limit. Next on the list are those who get in to the overtaking lane to get past a slower car just as you are approaching both of them. They are probably going 5-10 km/h faster than the slow car while I am going 20-40 km/h faster. This forces me to brake and wait for them to inch past. If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
Now, I have only held a licence for 3 years, but in that time I have covered 34000 miles (54400 Km). I have never hit another vehicle (so far). I drive a car that has the smallest engine you can get, so I *know* when I am slowing other drivers down. In such cases as this: 1. Single lane, if they cant overtake, I will pull over to let them past. (how nice) 2. Dual carriageway, I stick in the left hand lane (which is the slow lane in UK) 3. Motorway, I may occasioanly use the middle or fast lanes after checking who is coming and how fast. I hate having people drive on my rear bumper and pulling out can cause this to happen, so I try and avoid it happening. I am a very patient driver. I have this thing about stopping distances as well. I hate it when people over take you and then give you like 3 yards of stopping distance when they pull back in in front of you! :mad: I dont do this to ther drivers either. My driving moto is : If you wouldn't like it done to you, dont do it to them! I wish more people followed this rule. Any luck with that job hunting Michael? (sorry still can't attend any interviews for you) Roger Allen Sonork 100.10016 If I'm not breathing, I'm either dead or holding my breath. A fool jabbers, while a wise man listens. But is he so wise to listen to the fool?
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I have been doing a lot of driving in the last few days racking up kilometres on the freeway. This has exposed me to some of the biggest waste of body parts on the face of the earth. Fuckwits who have somehow gained a license and have since failed to kill themselves. The pricks who shit me the most are those driving slow in the overtaking lane. By slow I mean slower than me and not necessarily below the speed limit. Next on the list are those who get in to the overtaking lane to get past a slower car just as you are approaching both of them. They are probably going 5-10 km/h faster than the slow car while I am going 20-40 km/h faster. This forces me to brake and wait for them to inch past. If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
Michael Martin wrote: Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Yes, but keep the language clean please. Michael Martin wrote: If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. I believe the Sweedish Police have a Harpoon device now :-) and in S.A. Some cars have flame-throwers. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies
Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin :bob:
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Here's a thought... ...slow down. "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001
John, you of all people should know that driving slow on the freeway is bad :) [You are in Houston or San Antonio right? :confused:] Then again, the craziest driving I've ever seen was when I was in San Antonio, I'm glad I wasn't riding with them or else I would be scarred for life :omg: James Sonork ID: 100.11138 - Hasaki "I left there in the morning with their God tucked underneath my arm their half-assed smiles and the book of rules. So I asked this God a question and by way of firm reply, He said - I'm not the kind you have to wind up on Sundays." "Wind Up" from Aqualung, Jethro Tull 1971
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I have been doing a lot of driving in the last few days racking up kilometres on the freeway. This has exposed me to some of the biggest waste of body parts on the face of the earth. Fuckwits who have somehow gained a license and have since failed to kill themselves. The pricks who shit me the most are those driving slow in the overtaking lane. By slow I mean slower than me and not necessarily below the speed limit. Next on the list are those who get in to the overtaking lane to get past a slower car just as you are approaching both of them. They are probably going 5-10 km/h faster than the slow car while I am going 20-40 km/h faster. This forces me to brake and wait for them to inch past. If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
What pisses me off are people who drive like they own the road. they have no respect for speed limits, blowing past me like I'm standing still, even when I am doing 10 clicks over. They tailgate if you are not going fast enough for them, and as soon as they have a couple of centimeters of room, the blow past you. So basicly, the people who piss me off the most on the roads are people who drive like you. ;P --- CPUA 0x5041 Sonork 100.11743 Chicken Little It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
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Now, I have only held a licence for 3 years, but in that time I have covered 34000 miles (54400 Km). I have never hit another vehicle (so far). I drive a car that has the smallest engine you can get, so I *know* when I am slowing other drivers down. In such cases as this: 1. Single lane, if they cant overtake, I will pull over to let them past. (how nice) 2. Dual carriageway, I stick in the left hand lane (which is the slow lane in UK) 3. Motorway, I may occasioanly use the middle or fast lanes after checking who is coming and how fast. I hate having people drive on my rear bumper and pulling out can cause this to happen, so I try and avoid it happening. I am a very patient driver. I have this thing about stopping distances as well. I hate it when people over take you and then give you like 3 yards of stopping distance when they pull back in in front of you! :mad: I dont do this to ther drivers either. My driving moto is : If you wouldn't like it done to you, dont do it to them! I wish more people followed this rule. Any luck with that job hunting Michael? (sorry still can't attend any interviews for you) Roger Allen Sonork 100.10016 If I'm not breathing, I'm either dead or holding my breath. A fool jabbers, while a wise man listens. But is he so wise to listen to the fool?
1. Single lane, if they cant overtake, I will pull over to let them past. (how nice) I am submitting your name for the Nobel Peace Prize. Tim Smith I know what you're thinking punk, you're thinking did he spell check this document? Well, to tell you the truth I kinda forgot myself in all this excitement. But being this here's CodeProject, the most powerful forums in the world and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question, Do I feel lucky? Well do ya punk?
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1. Single lane, if they cant overtake, I will pull over to let them past. (how nice) I am submitting your name for the Nobel Peace Prize. Tim Smith I know what you're thinking punk, you're thinking did he spell check this document? Well, to tell you the truth I kinda forgot myself in all this excitement. But being this here's CodeProject, the most powerful forums in the world and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question, Do I feel lucky? Well do ya punk?
"Cover me, Honey! I'm gonna pass the Toyota..."
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We have an annual phenomenon called "Snowbird" that migrates here each winter. These are slow-moving, inattentive old people navigating 40' recreational vehicles on our narrow streets at half the posted speed. They come from Canada and the northern US to escape the cold at home, and generally make life miserable for all with their complete lack of driving skills. These odd creatures will blithely stare straight into the eyes of an oncoming driver doing the posted 45 mph, wait until he's 25' away, then pull out onto the highway in front of him without so much as a nod. They initiate u-turns from the right hand lane, without benefit of turn signals, and brake for hallucinations. The city promotes this as "Tourism" though all they contribute to the community is mayhem; they are best known for their shoplifting skills. Being on fixed incomes, they are too cheap to pay retail, so often help themselves to their own version of a senior discount. I've never been inside one of their RVs, but I can only assume that they don't come with plumbing. I surmise that personal hygiene is not a high priority to these people, judging by their slovenly appearance, and the odors that permeate the casinos across the river while they're perched here. Fortunately, Spring is here, and the homeward migration has begun. Life is, once again, good.
LOL, that was a good read, Roger. I'm from Canada, so I know what snowbirds are, though I didn't know it also reffered to seniors from the northern states as well. And, uh, you can keep them year round. ;P :-D "I've read the Bible through a couple of times and it is a nice collection of morality stories and adventure fiction. Sort of like Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer except without the laughs." -- Michael P Butler 14 Mar '02
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LOL, that was a good read, Roger. I'm from Canada, so I know what snowbirds are, though I didn't know it also reffered to seniors from the northern states as well. And, uh, you can keep them year round. ;P :-D "I've read the Bible through a couple of times and it is a nice collection of morality stories and adventure fiction. Sort of like Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer except without the laughs." -- Michael P Butler 14 Mar '02
Daniel Ferguson wrote: you can keep them year round No thanks! We have to clear them out in time for next month's River Run - 50,000+ bikers descend on our sleepy burg the last weekend of April, spend an ungodly amount of money, and return to their normal mundane lives. The local governments' thanks for their high roller contributions to the area is to call in every badge-heavy jackass willing to wear a uniform to harrass them over trivial offenses. They stimulate our economy far more than 4 months of imported Sunday drivers. And their semi-lovely ladies' penchant for flashing their hooters at the local yokels stimulates other things. Now they've made a law against even that. Stupid busy-bodies...:mad: Why don't they all move back to the PRC where they learned their rectocranially-inverted attitudes!
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Daniel Ferguson wrote: you can keep them year round No thanks! We have to clear them out in time for next month's River Run - 50,000+ bikers descend on our sleepy burg the last weekend of April, spend an ungodly amount of money, and return to their normal mundane lives. The local governments' thanks for their high roller contributions to the area is to call in every badge-heavy jackass willing to wear a uniform to harrass them over trivial offenses. They stimulate our economy far more than 4 months of imported Sunday drivers. And their semi-lovely ladies' penchant for flashing their hooters at the local yokels stimulates other things. Now they've made a law against even that. Stupid busy-bodies...:mad: Why don't they all move back to the PRC where they learned their rectocranially-inverted attitudes!
Roger Wright wrote: rectocranially-inverted attitudes I'm going to have to remember that one. :-D :laugh: BTW, where is PRC? "I've read the Bible through a couple of times and it is a nice collection of morality stories and adventure fiction. Sort of like Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer except without the laughs." -- Michael P Butler 14 Mar '02
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Roger Wright wrote: rectocranially-inverted attitudes I'm going to have to remember that one. :-D :laugh: BTW, where is PRC? "I've read the Bible through a couple of times and it is a nice collection of morality stories and adventure fiction. Sort of like Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer except without the laughs." -- Michael P Butler 14 Mar '02
Daniel Ferguson wrote: where is PRC? Just shorthand for the Peoples' Republic of California.
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Now, I have only held a licence for 3 years, but in that time I have covered 34000 miles (54400 Km). I have never hit another vehicle (so far). I drive a car that has the smallest engine you can get, so I *know* when I am slowing other drivers down. In such cases as this: 1. Single lane, if they cant overtake, I will pull over to let them past. (how nice) 2. Dual carriageway, I stick in the left hand lane (which is the slow lane in UK) 3. Motorway, I may occasioanly use the middle or fast lanes after checking who is coming and how fast. I hate having people drive on my rear bumper and pulling out can cause this to happen, so I try and avoid it happening. I am a very patient driver. I have this thing about stopping distances as well. I hate it when people over take you and then give you like 3 yards of stopping distance when they pull back in in front of you! :mad: I dont do this to ther drivers either. My driving moto is : If you wouldn't like it done to you, dont do it to them! I wish more people followed this rule. Any luck with that job hunting Michael? (sorry still can't attend any interviews for you) Roger Allen Sonork 100.10016 If I'm not breathing, I'm either dead or holding my breath. A fool jabbers, while a wise man listens. But is he so wise to listen to the fool?
Roger Allen wrote: Any luck with that job hunting Michael? (sorry still can't attend any interviews for you) None, they all want someone who is a Windows/Unix/Web/Consultant/Manager/Fuck Knows expert in everything. Don't think you would be much use. If you only have 3 years driving experience this would make you over 10 years younger than me. Don't know how you would go fronting up as a 33 year old. But your still a slack arse Pom for not making the effort for me. ;P Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
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Here's a thought... ...slow down. "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: Here's a thought... ...slow down. I suppose it's not a bad thought, but I'm too impatient to drive that slow. I mean 110 km/h on a 3 lane dual carriage way is just way too slow. Just in case that doesn't translate I mean, each direction has 3 lanes and each direction is seperated by several 10's of metres of bushland (at least). What is the speed limit on freeways over there? 110 km/h is approximately 68 mp/h. Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
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Michael Martin wrote: If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. If this becomes available for any vehicle I say we just modify it to fit any car and then a lot of people will be happy. :) Nick Parker
Nick Parker wrote: If this becomes available for any vehicle I say we just modify it to fit any car and then a lot of people will be happy. This is a brilliant idea. Can you perform this modification? Cause unfortunately I cannot, my speciality is destroying things not fixing them. Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
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Michael Martin wrote: Anyone else have experience with cocksuckers on the road? Yes, but keep the language clean please. Michael Martin wrote: If Toyota ever offers the front-mounted cannon for the Prado 4x4 they will have an instant and happy customer. I believe the Sweedish Police have a Harpoon device now :-) and in S.A. Some cars have flame-throwers. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies
Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin :bob:
****Colin Davies wrote: Yes, but keep the language clean please. Colin, this is the Rant and Rave forum so I am allowed to use whatever language I please. ****Colin Davies wrote: I believe the Sweedish Police have a Harpoon device now :) I want one. ****Colin Davies wrote: and in S.A. Some cars have flame-throwers. :) and one of these. Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
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What pisses me off are people who drive like they own the road. they have no respect for speed limits, blowing past me like I'm standing still, even when I am doing 10 clicks over. They tailgate if you are not going fast enough for them, and as soon as they have a couple of centimeters of room, the blow past you. So basicly, the people who piss me off the most on the roads are people who drive like you. ;P --- CPUA 0x5041 Sonork 100.11743 Chicken Little It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
PJ Arends wrote: What pisses me off are people who drive like they own the road. they have no respect for speed limits, blowing past me like I'm standing still, even when I am doing 10 clicks over. They tailgate if you are not going fast enough for them, and as soon as they have a couple of centimeters of room, the blow past you. So basicly, the people who piss me off the most on the roads are people who drive like you. ;P ..and the problem with this style of driving is? :-D P.S. By the way I do own the road. I have the certificate to prove it. Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: Here's a thought... ...slow down. I suppose it's not a bad thought, but I'm too impatient to drive that slow. I mean 110 km/h on a 3 lane dual carriage way is just way too slow. Just in case that doesn't translate I mean, each direction has 3 lanes and each direction is seperated by several 10's of metres of bushland (at least). What is the speed limit on freeways over there? 110 km/h is approximately 68 mp/h. Michael Martin Australia mjm68@tpg.com.au "He orginally got the Tweezers of Destruction through the scanners but then popped back outside for a smoke." - Chris Maunder 26/03/2002
In Michigan limited access freeways are limited to 70 m/h, but when you get to the Lansing <-> Detroit suberbs no one follows the speed limit, on my way to Wayne State University last Wednesday my dad was driving 85 m/h and he was the slow one! At one point the norm was 90-95 m/h for a good 5 mile stretch :omg: There was a state cop sitting in the median, but even if he wanted to, there was no way he could get into traffic to start to stop anyone. Highways are limited to 55 m/h (most highways are 1-2 lane in each direction with cross traffic every mile or so). James Sonork ID: 100.11138 - Hasaki "I left there in the morning with their God tucked underneath my arm their half-assed smiles and the book of rules. So I asked this God a question and by way of firm reply, He said - I'm not the kind you have to wind up on Sundays." "Wind Up" from Aqualung, Jethro Tull 1971
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John, you of all people should know that driving slow on the freeway is bad :) [You are in Houston or San Antonio right? :confused:] Then again, the craziest driving I've ever seen was when I was in San Antonio, I'm glad I wasn't riding with them or else I would be scarred for life :omg: James Sonork ID: 100.11138 - Hasaki "I left there in the morning with their God tucked underneath my arm their half-assed smiles and the book of rules. So I asked this God a question and by way of firm reply, He said - I'm not the kind you have to wind up on Sundays." "Wind Up" from Aqualung, Jethro Tull 1971
They're not crazy, they're just stupid. What do you expect from a town full of immigrants? I know how bad it is - I ride a motorcycle here too. "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001
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We have an annual phenomenon called "Snowbird" that migrates here each winter. These are slow-moving, inattentive old people navigating 40' recreational vehicles on our narrow streets at half the posted speed. They come from Canada and the northern US to escape the cold at home, and generally make life miserable for all with their complete lack of driving skills. These odd creatures will blithely stare straight into the eyes of an oncoming driver doing the posted 45 mph, wait until he's 25' away, then pull out onto the highway in front of him without so much as a nod. They initiate u-turns from the right hand lane, without benefit of turn signals, and brake for hallucinations. The city promotes this as "Tourism" though all they contribute to the community is mayhem; they are best known for their shoplifting skills. Being on fixed incomes, they are too cheap to pay retail, so often help themselves to their own version of a senior discount. I've never been inside one of their RVs, but I can only assume that they don't come with plumbing. I surmise that personal hygiene is not a high priority to these people, judging by their slovenly appearance, and the odors that permeate the casinos across the river while they're perched here. Fortunately, Spring is here, and the homeward migration has begun. Life is, once again, good.
