Dating tips for Christain men like CSS and ilion
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http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0701/dating.html GODLY SECRETS TO DATING SUCCESS 1. COMB YOUR HAIR Head lice are very common among Christian men, especially Pentecostals. Although it is a normal and natural blessing from God to have head lice, you should certainly wash your hair before your date if only for the reason to avoid the temptation of putting your arm around the young lady while lifting to scratch your head. 2. PRAY Spend the day before your date with at least 6-hours of solitary prayer in a prayer-closet or a confined area. Ask the Lord to guide your words and actions. Ask Jesus to help you control your lust and pray that you will have a nightly emission before the date, thus making it easier for your carnal mind to operate on a level that is strictly spiritual. Do not masturbate in your prayer-closet unless you are thinking about Jesus. Click here for more detailed spiritual guidance on masturbation. 3. PURCHASE A RING Visit a jewelry store and purchase a diamond ring. For the Christian man, every date is a potential mate. If she is the right gal, you will want to pop the question as soon as possible. It is always handy to have the engagement ring available. 4. RECITE VERSES When you are on the date, use awkward moments of silence to quote scripture, or sing a favorite hymn. All women are impressed with such things. If she is not woo\'d by this, it is a sign that she might be possessed by a demon. Take her to your church and drop her off by the back gate with a note to the pastor taped to her forehead. Be sure to secure her to a tree or post using chains or rope so that she won\'t get away during the night. 5. SPRUCE UP! Wear Christian cologne. The only Christian cologne available is \"Betty Bowers\' The Essence Of Christian Men.\" If you do not have any Christian cologne, rub your face in a Bible until you smell like the pages. 6. TAKE HER TO VISIT GOD The best place for a first date is church. Oh, how impressed your sweetheart will be when she finds out you are taking her to Sunday evening services! Then, a romantic dinner at Denny\'s! 7. GRILL HER FAITH Use the time at the restaurant to find out if your sweetheart is really saved. Question her salvation at least 15 times. Make sure she knows the exact day and hour (and preferably the exact minute) she met Jesus. 8. KEEP THE PASSION SUPPRESSED If the bandage work on your penis fails in the slightest bit, excuse yourself for the men\'s room and re-adjust the harnessing. 9. PRACTICE YOUR LINES Some Christian p
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http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0701/dating.html GODLY SECRETS TO DATING SUCCESS 1. COMB YOUR HAIR Head lice are very common among Christian men, especially Pentecostals. Although it is a normal and natural blessing from God to have head lice, you should certainly wash your hair before your date if only for the reason to avoid the temptation of putting your arm around the young lady while lifting to scratch your head. 2. PRAY Spend the day before your date with at least 6-hours of solitary prayer in a prayer-closet or a confined area. Ask the Lord to guide your words and actions. Ask Jesus to help you control your lust and pray that you will have a nightly emission before the date, thus making it easier for your carnal mind to operate on a level that is strictly spiritual. Do not masturbate in your prayer-closet unless you are thinking about Jesus. Click here for more detailed spiritual guidance on masturbation. 3. PURCHASE A RING Visit a jewelry store and purchase a diamond ring. For the Christian man, every date is a potential mate. If she is the right gal, you will want to pop the question as soon as possible. It is always handy to have the engagement ring available. 4. RECITE VERSES When you are on the date, use awkward moments of silence to quote scripture, or sing a favorite hymn. All women are impressed with such things. If she is not woo\'d by this, it is a sign that she might be possessed by a demon. Take her to your church and drop her off by the back gate with a note to the pastor taped to her forehead. Be sure to secure her to a tree or post using chains or rope so that she won\'t get away during the night. 5. SPRUCE UP! Wear Christian cologne. The only Christian cologne available is \"Betty Bowers\' The Essence Of Christian Men.\" If you do not have any Christian cologne, rub your face in a Bible until you smell like the pages. 6. TAKE HER TO VISIT GOD The best place for a first date is church. Oh, how impressed your sweetheart will be when she finds out you are taking her to Sunday evening services! Then, a romantic dinner at Denny\'s! 7. GRILL HER FAITH Use the time at the restaurant to find out if your sweetheart is really saved. Question her salvation at least 15 times. Make sure she knows the exact day and hour (and preferably the exact minute) she met Jesus. 8. KEEP THE PASSION SUPPRESSED If the bandage work on your penis fails in the slightest bit, excuse yourself for the men\'s room and re-adjust the harnessing. 9. PRACTICE YOUR LINES Some Christian p
Why don't we change the post title to "dating tips for Muslim men like Adnan" and see how quickly it gets voted into obscurity. But wait, that would be racist and hypocritical...
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Why don't we change the post title to "dating tips for Muslim men like Adnan" and see how quickly it gets voted into obscurity. But wait, that would be racist and hypocritical...
It wouldnt matter, whatever i post will be voted down by default because of this accounts low post count. :(
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It wouldnt matter, whatever i post will be voted down by default because of this accounts low post count. :(
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Unregistered User wrote:
It wouldnt matter, whatever i post will be voted down by default
Then why bother in the first place.
Perhaps getting 5 votes is not the only possible motivation for posting?
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Perhaps getting 5 votes is not the only possible motivation for posting?
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Yes, trolling is always and excellent motivator.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
True, and so is making fun of someones rediculous beliefs.
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It wouldnt matter, whatever i post will be voted down by default because of this accounts low post count. :(
Unregistered User wrote:
It wouldnt matter, whatever i post will be voted down by default because of this accounts low post count.
I suppose you could alway post under your regular account... oh. right. :rolleyes:
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It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.
--Raymond Chen on MSDN
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True, and so is making fun of someones rediculous beliefs.
Unregistered User wrote:
rediculous
How 'bout making fun of someone's lame spelling / punctuation... ;P
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It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.
--Raymond Chen on MSDN
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Unregistered User wrote:
rediculous
How 'bout making fun of someone's lame spelling / punctuation... ;P
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It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.
--Raymond Chen on MSDN
Sure, maybe we can start the above post by leckey [QUOTE]Yes, trolling is always and excellent motivator. [/QUOTE]
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True, and so is making fun of someones rediculous beliefs.
Unregistered User wrote:
True, and so is making fun of someones rediculous beliefs.
Of course, its' fun only so long as you (plural) can prevent the person with "rediculous" beliefs from making it quite clear just who has the ridiculous beliefs. :laugh: But, the truth always outs. The hijinks you kiddies are playing aren't exactly a secret to anyone.
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Unregistered User wrote:
True, and so is making fun of someones rediculous beliefs.
Of course, its' fun only so long as you (plural) can prevent the person with "rediculous" beliefs from making it quite clear just who has the ridiculous beliefs. :laugh: But, the truth always outs. The hijinks you kiddies are playing aren't exactly a secret to anyone.
I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
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Yes, trolling is always and excellent motivator.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
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I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
Unregistered User wrote:
I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
It is your choice, after all. Though, at the same time, since you've already sentenced me to Hell (as per below), it would seem you'll be in a bit of a quandry: can't go to Heaven (God will be there), can't go to Hell (I'll be there, waiting for you). I suppose you'll just be left out, alone, in the cold.
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http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0701/dating.html GODLY SECRETS TO DATING SUCCESS 1. COMB YOUR HAIR Head lice are very common among Christian men, especially Pentecostals. Although it is a normal and natural blessing from God to have head lice, you should certainly wash your hair before your date if only for the reason to avoid the temptation of putting your arm around the young lady while lifting to scratch your head. 2. PRAY Spend the day before your date with at least 6-hours of solitary prayer in a prayer-closet or a confined area. Ask the Lord to guide your words and actions. Ask Jesus to help you control your lust and pray that you will have a nightly emission before the date, thus making it easier for your carnal mind to operate on a level that is strictly spiritual. Do not masturbate in your prayer-closet unless you are thinking about Jesus. Click here for more detailed spiritual guidance on masturbation. 3. PURCHASE A RING Visit a jewelry store and purchase a diamond ring. For the Christian man, every date is a potential mate. If she is the right gal, you will want to pop the question as soon as possible. It is always handy to have the engagement ring available. 4. RECITE VERSES When you are on the date, use awkward moments of silence to quote scripture, or sing a favorite hymn. All women are impressed with such things. If she is not woo\'d by this, it is a sign that she might be possessed by a demon. Take her to your church and drop her off by the back gate with a note to the pastor taped to her forehead. Be sure to secure her to a tree or post using chains or rope so that she won\'t get away during the night. 5. SPRUCE UP! Wear Christian cologne. The only Christian cologne available is \"Betty Bowers\' The Essence Of Christian Men.\" If you do not have any Christian cologne, rub your face in a Bible until you smell like the pages. 6. TAKE HER TO VISIT GOD The best place for a first date is church. Oh, how impressed your sweetheart will be when she finds out you are taking her to Sunday evening services! Then, a romantic dinner at Denny\'s! 7. GRILL HER FAITH Use the time at the restaurant to find out if your sweetheart is really saved. Question her salvation at least 15 times. Make sure she knows the exact day and hour (and preferably the exact minute) she met Jesus. 8. KEEP THE PASSION SUPPRESSED If the bandage work on your penis fails in the slightest bit, excuse yourself for the men\'s room and re-adjust the harnessing. 9. PRACTICE YOUR LINES Some Christian p
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I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
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I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
Unregistered User wrote:
I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
Isn't it illegal to say things like this in the United Kingdom? I am going to notify the European Union Thought and Speech authorities. They will have some brain wa... I mean "therapy" to give you.
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Unregistered User wrote:
Dating tips for Christain men like CSS and ilion
That is ABSOLUTE RUBBISH!
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http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0701/dating.html GODLY SECRETS TO DATING SUCCESS 1. COMB YOUR HAIR Head lice are very common among Christian men, especially Pentecostals. Although it is a normal and natural blessing from God to have head lice, you should certainly wash your hair before your date if only for the reason to avoid the temptation of putting your arm around the young lady while lifting to scratch your head. 2. PRAY Spend the day before your date with at least 6-hours of solitary prayer in a prayer-closet or a confined area. Ask the Lord to guide your words and actions. Ask Jesus to help you control your lust and pray that you will have a nightly emission before the date, thus making it easier for your carnal mind to operate on a level that is strictly spiritual. Do not masturbate in your prayer-closet unless you are thinking about Jesus. Click here for more detailed spiritual guidance on masturbation. 3. PURCHASE A RING Visit a jewelry store and purchase a diamond ring. For the Christian man, every date is a potential mate. If she is the right gal, you will want to pop the question as soon as possible. It is always handy to have the engagement ring available. 4. RECITE VERSES When you are on the date, use awkward moments of silence to quote scripture, or sing a favorite hymn. All women are impressed with such things. If she is not woo\'d by this, it is a sign that she might be possessed by a demon. Take her to your church and drop her off by the back gate with a note to the pastor taped to her forehead. Be sure to secure her to a tree or post using chains or rope so that she won\'t get away during the night. 5. SPRUCE UP! Wear Christian cologne. The only Christian cologne available is \"Betty Bowers\' The Essence Of Christian Men.\" If you do not have any Christian cologne, rub your face in a Bible until you smell like the pages. 6. TAKE HER TO VISIT GOD The best place for a first date is church. Oh, how impressed your sweetheart will be when she finds out you are taking her to Sunday evening services! Then, a romantic dinner at Denny\'s! 7. GRILL HER FAITH Use the time at the restaurant to find out if your sweetheart is really saved. Question her salvation at least 15 times. Make sure she knows the exact day and hour (and preferably the exact minute) she met Jesus. 8. KEEP THE PASSION SUPPRESSED If the bandage work on your penis fails in the slightest bit, excuse yourself for the men\'s room and re-adjust the harnessing. 9. PRACTICE YOUR LINES Some Christian p
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Unregistered User wrote:
I would rather worship Satan and burn in hell than your worship pathetic god.
Isn't it illegal to say things like this in the United Kingdom? I am going to notify the European Union Thought and Speech authorities. They will have some brain wa... I mean "therapy" to give you.
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