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Dear Sir

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Back Room
careercollaborationworkspace
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  • D Offline
    D Offline
    David Wulff
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    A letter from the penis Dear Sir, I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor. I work at great depths. I plunge head first into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I don’t get paid overtime. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Yours sincerely, The Penis The response: Dear Penis, After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don’t always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work before you have completed the assigned task. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, The Management


    David Wulff
    http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

    I could have created a cool signature brought to life with complex interactive DHTML, but I don't like to show off.

    J M J 3 Replies Last reply
    0
    • D David Wulff

      A letter from the penis Dear Sir, I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor. I work at great depths. I plunge head first into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I don’t get paid overtime. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Yours sincerely, The Penis The response: Dear Penis, After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don’t always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work before you have completed the assigned task. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, The Management


      David Wulff
      http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

      I could have created a cool signature brought to life with complex interactive DHTML, but I don't like to show off.

      J Offline
      J Offline
      Jim Crafton
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Bravo !

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • D David Wulff

        A letter from the penis Dear Sir, I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor. I work at great depths. I plunge head first into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I don’t get paid overtime. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Yours sincerely, The Penis The response: Dear Penis, After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don’t always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work before you have completed the assigned task. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, The Management


        David Wulff
        http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

        I could have created a cool signature brought to life with complex interactive DHTML, but I don't like to show off.

        M Offline
        M Offline
        Mazdak
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Excellent. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Mazy **"If I go crazy then will you still Call me Superman If I’m alive and well, will you be There holding my hand I’ll keep you by my side with My superhuman might Kryptonite"**Kryptonite-3 Doors Down

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • D David Wulff

          A letter from the penis Dear Sir, I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor. I work at great depths. I plunge head first into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I don’t get paid overtime. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Yours sincerely, The Penis The response: Dear Penis, After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don’t always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work before you have completed the assigned task. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, The Management


          David Wulff
          http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

          I could have created a cool signature brought to life with complex interactive DHTML, but I don't like to show off.

          J Offline
          J Offline
          Jeremy Falcon
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Good one! :) Jeremy L. Falcon Homepage : Sonork = 100.16311
          "The height of your accomplishments will equal the depth of your convictions." - William F. Scolavino

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