CP Project and Rant
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Megan Forbes wrote: That really does suck, and not having someone you are close to around you will be hard. Of course, those reunions will be wonderful... Yeah it for sure sux. But I agree, I think the reunions will be great times :) Megan Forbes wrote: Hard to offer advice, without knowing a little more (ok, now I just feel nosy... but that's not how I intend to sound). Would one of you be prepared to relocate (her back home, or you out to California) in a while if you continue to get closer? How old are you both? Do you see yourselves together in 20 years? You don't sound nosy, don't worry...I appreciate the feedback :). We talked about it, and if we're still together after her first year she will come back home or I will go out there (but probably she'll come back home, since this is where both our families are). We're only 22 (both turning 23 at the end of the summer). Not so sure about the 20 years thing I suppose (we're too young for that), but we are really close, and things are great between us. Megan Forbes wrote: My (now) husband and I spent 2,5 years apart, after going out since high school. I was backpacking and putting myself through college in the UK, he was studying and doing his articles at home in South Africa. I guess that's the ultra super duper long distance relationship ;). It sounds quite difficult, but I'm glad to hear you made it through it all (and from your other posts, it sounds like you two are really happy together :)). But your time in the UK sounds tough, and I'm betting we will each go through some tough times as well, which sucks. Megan Forbes wrote: They can, and they do. Providing there is some kind of planned light at the end of the tunnel Thanks for the promising comments, and I'm glad to hear your story of it. It sounds like it might be possible to have our relationship last through this, and I will remember your advice about commitment :) Megan Forbes wrote: I hope I haven't depressed you further Not at all! Thanks for responding, especially with so much insight into this whole thing. :rose: Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareChris Richardson wrote: Not so sure about the 20 years thing I suppose (we're too young for that), What?? IMO, it's all about attitude. If you two have been together for a while, you can be thinking one of two things: 1) this is someone that I like, but if something better comes along, oh well, I'll give it a try, or 2) this is someone that I love as a part of my life and I want to WORK to keep it that way. The two of you need to talk about which of these you each are thinking, and then the future will be clearer. If either of you are thinking #1, then let her go to California, give her a nice kiss goodbye and tell her "have a good time and I'll see you soon." Then, let her have a good time and go see her soon. If you both are thinking #2, then all of the things the others have said will be great ideas ... you can keep in touch every day, send her letters, flowers, go visit, and love every moment of it. At some point in the future, you will be back together, having missed each other terribly, and ready to keep going. Good luck, Dave "You can say that again." -- Dept. of Redundancy Dept.
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Well it looks like I'll have ample free time to work on the CP Project. My girlfriend is moving to California in 3 weeks since she got a job as a teacher there :(. We're going to try the (ultra) long distance thing for the first few months to see how it goes, but I'm not so sure it's going to work (we live in Minnesota now). This sux :mad:. On the (slightly) plus side of it, since the school she will be working at has all year education, she gets to come home for two months, every few months. And since California is a cool place to visit, I'll be out there when I can (I could even work while I'm there if I don't have the vacation time, since both my bosses live and work near where she's moving to). Anybody else having a crap day besides me, or does anyone have any thoughts on trying to maintain a super long distance relationship? (also sorry to post this to everyone, I just had to rant) Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareYou can make it work if you're both committed to it. My fianceé and I did it for two years. Granted, Northern California-Southern California is a much smaller distance than California-Minnesota, but it sounds like you'll be able to visit each other fairly often. It's hard and you'll probably rack up a monstrous phone bill, but if and when it works out, it's totally worth it. Now, if I may take off the rose-colored glasses for a moment, I would like to offer you a piece of practical advice. If she's not the one, or if you don't see any future for the two of you, then don't waste your time on a long-distance relationship. Talk to her about where she sees you two in a few years. Make sure you have compatible plans. Be as certain as possible that if you invest a huge amount of time and money into maintaining this relationship, you'll have something to show for it in the end. That being said, I wish you the best of luck. It can be done. :)
Jon Sagara
In India, when someone says "mad cow", you know it's actually a bull charging at him. -- Rohit Sinha -
A few things to help you keep this in perspective: :) Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Out of sight, out of mind. If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with. If you truly love something, set it free. If it truly loves you, it will return.
Ed Gadziemski wrote: Out of sight, out of mind. :laugh:
Jon Sagara
In India, when someone says "mad cow", you know it's actually a bull charging at him. -- Rohit Sinha -
Well it looks like I'll have ample free time to work on the CP Project. My girlfriend is moving to California in 3 weeks since she got a job as a teacher there :(. We're going to try the (ultra) long distance thing for the first few months to see how it goes, but I'm not so sure it's going to work (we live in Minnesota now). This sux :mad:. On the (slightly) plus side of it, since the school she will be working at has all year education, she gets to come home for two months, every few months. And since California is a cool place to visit, I'll be out there when I can (I could even work while I'm there if I don't have the vacation time, since both my bosses live and work near where she's moving to). Anybody else having a crap day besides me, or does anyone have any thoughts on trying to maintain a super long distance relationship? (also sorry to post this to everyone, I just had to rant) Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareMy roommate in college dated his gf long distance (Savanna GA to Daytona Beach FL) for 4.5 yrs. ... well, they're married now. So there is hope. - Nitron
"Those that say a task is impossible shouldn't interrupt the ones who are doing it." - Chinese Proverb
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Well it looks like I'll have ample free time to work on the CP Project. My girlfriend is moving to California in 3 weeks since she got a job as a teacher there :(. We're going to try the (ultra) long distance thing for the first few months to see how it goes, but I'm not so sure it's going to work (we live in Minnesota now). This sux :mad:. On the (slightly) plus side of it, since the school she will be working at has all year education, she gets to come home for two months, every few months. And since California is a cool place to visit, I'll be out there when I can (I could even work while I'm there if I don't have the vacation time, since both my bosses live and work near where she's moving to). Anybody else having a crap day besides me, or does anyone have any thoughts on trying to maintain a super long distance relationship? (also sorry to post this to everyone, I just had to rant) Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareMegan's wonderful story has prompted me to add a bit of my own. When my wife and I first met, it was by way of a match maker who knew us both. At the time we both lived a day's drive from each other and miraculously, true love blossomed. Then I went and got another job and instead of moving closer, I moved to a very remote part of Canada where once you flew in, you were in and stayed there for four months. About 10 weeks into the contract, I called her up one night to tell her that I was not going to renew my contract and that when I was finished, I would be returning to live with her. She then proceeded to tell me that she was holding in her hand, a letter that she was about to mail to me, suggesting that we discontinue our relationship, because she didn't think she could go on any longer with this long distance sh1t. With my news, she decided to rip up the letter, I listened to her do that over the phone, and the rest they say is history. To this day, my wife still talks about that phone call and what would have happened if she had been out, or if the line was busy. If you both want to make things work out, the two of you will do so. Good Luck. :rose: Chris Meech "what makes CP different is the people and sense of community, things people will only discover if they join up and join in." Christian Graus Nov 14, 2002. "Microsoft hasn't ever enforced its patents. Apparently they keep them for defensive reasons only. Or, they could be waiting 'til they have a critical mass of patents, enforce them all at once and win the game of Risk that they're playing with the world." Chris Sells Feb 18, 2003.
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That really does suck, and not having someone you are close to around you will be hard. Of course, those reunions will be wonderful... :rose: Hard to offer advice, without knowing a little more (ok, now I just feel nosy... :-O but that's not how I intend to sound). Would one of you be prepared to relocate (her back home, or you out to California) in a while if you continue to get closer? How old are you both? Do you see yourselves together in 20 years? My (now) husband and I spent 2,5 years apart, after going out since high school. I was backpacking and putting myself through college in the UK, he was studying and doing his articles at home in South Africa. It was harsh, at times it was terrible. I spent January and February 1999 mornings and evenings running round Hyde Park, hoping that the pain of the terribly cold air in my lungs would help the pain of being away from him. It didn't. But, looking back, I can honestly say those years were one of the best things that could have happened to us. For one thing, we were 21-23 at that stage. It saved us from getting married too young. For another, it allowed us to "find ourselves" independantly. We did keep in touch though - more than most people around us thought was healthy. Sms/text messaging was in it's infancy, yet we used it throughout the day to keep in touch, as well as emailing literally every couple of hours. Being apart these days is not the same as it must have been 50 years ago :). However, now, at 28 years old, I would hate the idea of spending even one night away from him. I guess what I'm trying to say is, a lot of things depend on timing, in both your lives. And, if it's going to work, commitment. Total commitment. But don't believe friends who want to set you up with other people that long distance relationships can't work. They can, and they do. Providing there is some kind of planned light at the end of the tunnel :) I hope I haven't depressed you further :rose:
So few words, and yet so precise! Megan, you're a poet of mathematical accuracy! - Jörgen Sigvardsson
Truly wonderful story, Megan. Chris Meech "what makes CP different is the people and sense of community, things people will only discover if they join up and join in." Christian Graus Nov 14, 2002. "Microsoft hasn't ever enforced its patents. Apparently they keep them for defensive reasons only. Or, they could be waiting 'til they have a critical mass of patents, enforce them all at once and win the game of Risk that they're playing with the world." Chris Sells Feb 18, 2003.
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Megan's wonderful story has prompted me to add a bit of my own. When my wife and I first met, it was by way of a match maker who knew us both. At the time we both lived a day's drive from each other and miraculously, true love blossomed. Then I went and got another job and instead of moving closer, I moved to a very remote part of Canada where once you flew in, you were in and stayed there for four months. About 10 weeks into the contract, I called her up one night to tell her that I was not going to renew my contract and that when I was finished, I would be returning to live with her. She then proceeded to tell me that she was holding in her hand, a letter that she was about to mail to me, suggesting that we discontinue our relationship, because she didn't think she could go on any longer with this long distance sh1t. With my news, she decided to rip up the letter, I listened to her do that over the phone, and the rest they say is history. To this day, my wife still talks about that phone call and what would have happened if she had been out, or if the line was busy. If you both want to make things work out, the two of you will do so. Good Luck. :rose: Chris Meech "what makes CP different is the people and sense of community, things people will only discover if they join up and join in." Christian Graus Nov 14, 2002. "Microsoft hasn't ever enforced its patents. Apparently they keep them for defensive reasons only. Or, they could be waiting 'til they have a critical mass of patents, enforce them all at once and win the game of Risk that they're playing with the world." Chris Sells Feb 18, 2003.
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Megan Forbes wrote: That really does suck, and not having someone you are close to around you will be hard. Of course, those reunions will be wonderful... Yeah it for sure sux. But I agree, I think the reunions will be great times :) Megan Forbes wrote: Hard to offer advice, without knowing a little more (ok, now I just feel nosy... but that's not how I intend to sound). Would one of you be prepared to relocate (her back home, or you out to California) in a while if you continue to get closer? How old are you both? Do you see yourselves together in 20 years? You don't sound nosy, don't worry...I appreciate the feedback :). We talked about it, and if we're still together after her first year she will come back home or I will go out there (but probably she'll come back home, since this is where both our families are). We're only 22 (both turning 23 at the end of the summer). Not so sure about the 20 years thing I suppose (we're too young for that), but we are really close, and things are great between us. Megan Forbes wrote: My (now) husband and I spent 2,5 years apart, after going out since high school. I was backpacking and putting myself through college in the UK, he was studying and doing his articles at home in South Africa. I guess that's the ultra super duper long distance relationship ;). It sounds quite difficult, but I'm glad to hear you made it through it all (and from your other posts, it sounds like you two are really happy together :)). But your time in the UK sounds tough, and I'm betting we will each go through some tough times as well, which sucks. Megan Forbes wrote: They can, and they do. Providing there is some kind of planned light at the end of the tunnel Thanks for the promising comments, and I'm glad to hear your story of it. It sounds like it might be possible to have our relationship last through this, and I will remember your advice about commitment :) Megan Forbes wrote: I hope I haven't depressed you further Not at all! Thanks for responding, especially with so much insight into this whole thing. :rose: Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareChris Richardson wrote: Not so sure about the 20 years thing I suppose (we're too young for that), but we are really close, and things are great between us. As some others have said, if you aren't sure, rather be fair to both of you and call it quits now. But if you believe she is worth the hard work, and she feels the same way, then go for it! Great rewards in the end :) And a year, although tough, will fly by - look, it's June already! I hope things work out well for you both. As you say, things are great between you, and there's nothing better than being in love with someone who's a great friend. :rose:
So few words, and yet so precise! Megan, you're a poet of mathematical accuracy! - Jörgen Sigvardsson
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Megan's wonderful story has prompted me to add a bit of my own. When my wife and I first met, it was by way of a match maker who knew us both. At the time we both lived a day's drive from each other and miraculously, true love blossomed. Then I went and got another job and instead of moving closer, I moved to a very remote part of Canada where once you flew in, you were in and stayed there for four months. About 10 weeks into the contract, I called her up one night to tell her that I was not going to renew my contract and that when I was finished, I would be returning to live with her. She then proceeded to tell me that she was holding in her hand, a letter that she was about to mail to me, suggesting that we discontinue our relationship, because she didn't think she could go on any longer with this long distance sh1t. With my news, she decided to rip up the letter, I listened to her do that over the phone, and the rest they say is history. To this day, my wife still talks about that phone call and what would have happened if she had been out, or if the line was busy. If you both want to make things work out, the two of you will do so. Good Luck. :rose: Chris Meech "what makes CP different is the people and sense of community, things people will only discover if they join up and join in." Christian Graus Nov 14, 2002. "Microsoft hasn't ever enforced its patents. Apparently they keep them for defensive reasons only. Or, they could be waiting 'til they have a critical mass of patents, enforce them all at once and win the game of Risk that they're playing with the world." Chris Sells Feb 18, 2003.
Chris Meech wrote: To this day, my wife still talks about that phone call and what would have happened if she had been out, or if the line was busy. Ain't love and life grand? :) That really brought a smile to my face this morning.
So few words, and yet so precise! Megan, you're a poet of mathematical accuracy! - Jörgen Sigvardsson
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Chris Meech wrote: To this day, my wife still talks about that phone call and what would have happened if she had been out, or if the line was busy. Ain't love and life grand? :) That really brought a smile to my face this morning.
So few words, and yet so precise! Megan, you're a poet of mathematical accuracy! - Jörgen Sigvardsson
Megan Forbes wrote: Ain't love and life grand? Only when it works out. :(( Megan Forbes wrote: That really brought a smile to my face this morning There's been some nice stories here today. :)
David Wulff
"It is a helpless feeling to be unable to make something so terribly wrong... right."
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Well it looks like I'll have ample free time to work on the CP Project. My girlfriend is moving to California in 3 weeks since she got a job as a teacher there :(. We're going to try the (ultra) long distance thing for the first few months to see how it goes, but I'm not so sure it's going to work (we live in Minnesota now). This sux :mad:. On the (slightly) plus side of it, since the school she will be working at has all year education, she gets to come home for two months, every few months. And since California is a cool place to visit, I'll be out there when I can (I could even work while I'm there if I don't have the vacation time, since both my bosses live and work near where she's moving to). Anybody else having a crap day besides me, or does anyone have any thoughts on trying to maintain a super long distance relationship? (also sorry to post this to everyone, I just had to rant) Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareThank you to everyone who responded. Some very good stories in the responses :). I've got hope for the two of us, and thanks for the inspiration. :rose: Chris Richardson
Terrain Software -
Well it looks like I'll have ample free time to work on the CP Project. My girlfriend is moving to California in 3 weeks since she got a job as a teacher there :(. We're going to try the (ultra) long distance thing for the first few months to see how it goes, but I'm not so sure it's going to work (we live in Minnesota now). This sux :mad:. On the (slightly) plus side of it, since the school she will be working at has all year education, she gets to come home for two months, every few months. And since California is a cool place to visit, I'll be out there when I can (I could even work while I'm there if I don't have the vacation time, since both my bosses live and work near where she's moving to). Anybody else having a crap day besides me, or does anyone have any thoughts on trying to maintain a super long distance relationship? (also sorry to post this to everyone, I just had to rant) Chris Richardson
Terrain SoftwareChris Richardson wrote: Anybody else having a crap day besides me... Yep. I went to Court today to try to get access to my kids and was refused. As the next Hearing has been scheduled for early October, I certainly won't get to see them before then, and maybe not even this year. Right now they can take the so called British justice system is shove it. It's badly fucked up. :mad: Anna :rose: Homepage | My life in tears "Be yourself - not what others think you should be" - Marcia Graesch "Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart" - A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work. Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Visual C++ Add-In