NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE
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NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE To the citizens of the United States of America, In the light of your failure to be able to elect a President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The Right Honorable Tony Blair, MP, for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following Rules are introduced with immediate effect: 1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary". Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed". 2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. 3. You should learn to distinguish the British and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. 4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. 5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through. 6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least
I think the last time England tried to tell us how they'd manage the country, her best got their butts kicked by a bunch of farmers. Also, seeing as how she's handled the running of Northern Ireland, I think we'll stick to our own way. But, thanks for playing and I'll let Stan or John give you your parting gifts on the way out ;P Cheers, Tom Archer "Use what talents you possess. The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." - William Blake * Inside C# -Second Edition * Visual C++.NET Bible * Extending MFC Applications with the .NET Framework
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Richard Stringer wrote: Over engineered - over priced possibly, but fun as hell to drive. BW The Biggest Loser
"Farm Donkey makes us laugh.
Farm Donkey hauls some ass."
-The StovesIf professionally set up. Otherwise they oversteer and the brakes are touchy. Also if you are not , shall we say , skinny there ain't much room in there and the position of the seats don't give much leeway. I have trouble shifting the Boxster ( my business partner has one ). Not that the tranny isn't smooth as silk - it is - but the position of the gear in relationship to the seat is not very good for someone of my build. Richard "Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer --Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
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If professionally set up. Otherwise they oversteer and the brakes are touchy. Also if you are not , shall we say , skinny there ain't much room in there and the position of the seats don't give much leeway. I have trouble shifting the Boxster ( my business partner has one ). Not that the tranny isn't smooth as silk - it is - but the position of the gear in relationship to the seat is not very good for someone of my build. Richard "Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer --Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
I haven't driven the Boxster, but I will admit I wasn't impressed with early Z3, especially because of the room and partially because it was only 4cyl. I love driving my '96 328i though, just wish I found one with a stick. Not a sports car, but for a sedan I couldn't ask for much more. BW The Biggest Loser
"Farm Donkey makes us laugh.
Farm Donkey hauls some ass."
-The Stoves -
LOL - did you write this ? It's just as funny as the original. But you can't seriously tell me there's a difference between Canadian and US accents ? Christian I have several lifelong friends that are New Yorkers but I have always gravitated toward the weirdo's. - Richard Stringer
Oh, there's a difference between Canadian and American accents. It can be subtle though and I might not be able to tell them apart if I wasn't Canadian.... eh.
I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours. ~Stephen Roberts
« eikonoklastes »
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K(arl) wrote: I prefer a bike, for me it's much more impressive I haven't ridden bike much since I put my BSA Gold Star under a logging truck outside of Boulder Colorado some years ago. I still have the bike in the garage ( it needs some TLC and a few parts ). In 91 I traded a old pickup truck for a 67 Harley and had about 3500.00 work done on it and only rode it a few times. I sold it in 95 and actually made money on the deal. I got 6700 and the truck was only worth about 1500 -2000. Richard ( who knows what a log trucks tranny looks like from underneath ) "Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer --Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Richard Stringer wrote: BSA Gold Star That one?[^] Waoh, cool! Performances must be far from modern motorcycle, but I find the look outstanding. Richard Stringer wrote: knows what a log trucks tranny looks like from underneath Ouch! That must be frightening. I suppose you can consider lucky to be still alive?
Fold With Us! "A leader is a man who can adapt principles to circumstances - Georges S. Patton, 1885–1945"
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Fortunatly for you, here in the US we believe in freedom of the press, so we will allow you to print the above just as long as you like. Try to act on the above though, and you will discover that there are more guns here than people, and we have more people than you do. We know how to use them. I'm not talking about inaccurate, low power, ugly "assult" rifels, I'm talking about good honest hunting guns, able to kill a 500 lbs (not that kilogram junk you scream is better, nor even the stones we know you still use when nobody is looking) animal with no problems. You puny 150 lbs is no problem. Thats just insurance in case you are stupid enough to try something.
Henry miller wrote: Fortunatly for you, here in the US we believe in freedom of the press, so we will allow you to print the above just as long as you like. That's SO nice of you, event though, as far as I know, the CP servers are located in Canada, so there is absolutely nothing you could do anyway ;P "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus
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I'll take my 240hp Accord Sedan EX over all of them. :-D "Reality is what refuses to go away when I stop believing in it." Philip K. Dick
Nice, but this is the car of my dreams: VW Phaeton[^] Be sure to check out the W12 Engine :omg: But I guess I never get hold on that kind of money :-( "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus
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I think the last time England tried to tell us how they'd manage the country, her best got their butts kicked by a bunch of farmers. Also, seeing as how she's handled the running of Northern Ireland, I think we'll stick to our own way. But, thanks for playing and I'll let Stan or John give you your parting gifts on the way out ;P Cheers, Tom Archer "Use what talents you possess. The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." - William Blake * Inside C# -Second Edition * Visual C++.NET Bible * Extending MFC Applications with the .NET Framework
Tom Archer wrote: her best got their butts kicked by a bunch of farmers. Are you implying that the french troops were farmers in disguise ;P "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus
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Oh, there's a difference between Canadian and American accents. It can be subtle though and I might not be able to tell them apart if I wasn't Canadian.... eh.
I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours. ~Stephen Roberts
« eikonoklastes »
You say that if there is only one "American" accent. (by which you are obviously excluding all of Canada) There are 3 major different accents in the US (southern is the most recognizable, but the north and the middle are different), and each one has many many sub accents. Its not as bad as England where some people can tell which block you live on by your accent, but a good ear can guess which state someone lives in, with a typical error of being off by the by the next state over. Linguists study this. It is a interesting subject, though I'm not sure if it has any use. (There are other subjects that linguists study there are more useful, but overall I find them less interesting)
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Henry miller wrote: Fortunatly for you, here in the US we believe in freedom of the press, so we will allow you to print the above just as long as you like. That's SO nice of you, event though, as far as I know, the CP servers are located in Canada, so there is absolutely nothing you could do anyway ;P "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus
Sure there is. The US could easially turn all of Great Briton (is that the right region? I know there are differences between England, G.B., and U.K., but I'm not sure which is the best term here) into a uninhabbited swamp. We won't, at least not over this silly issue, but we could if you did something stupid enough to warrent it.
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Tom Archer wrote: her best got their butts kicked by a bunch of farmers. Are you implying that the french troops were farmers in disguise ;P "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus
I have no problem in stating that the French were a very important part of our fight for independence. Cheers, Tom Archer "Use what talents you possess. The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." - William Blake * Inside C# -Second Edition * Visual C++.NET Bible * Extending MFC Applications with the .NET Framework
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>Don't have to name them - you know them. Count me ignorant. I am genuinely curious as to which American cars you think are better than German cars. regards, Paul Watson South Africa Michael Dunn wrote: "except the sod who voted this a 1, NO SOUP FOR YOU" Crikey! ain't life grand?
Name me one car by anyone designed and built in one country with parts all designed and built in one country. I don't follow cars for the most part, but in the issue I care most about: reliability, the Korean cars far outshine anything else. Thats in the last 3 years, who knows how this years models will stack up? I won't buy a car with less than 100,000 miles on it. I'm cheap, so I want something that I can take from 116,000 to 350,000 without spending much on it. I drive a Japanese designed car made in Canada with an American name. So what do I call my car?
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Nice, but this is the car of my dreams: VW Phaeton[^] Be sure to check out the W12 Engine :omg: But I guess I never get hold on that kind of money :-( "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus
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Name me one car by anyone designed and built in one country with parts all designed and built in one country. I don't follow cars for the most part, but in the issue I care most about: reliability, the Korean cars far outshine anything else. Thats in the last 3 years, who knows how this years models will stack up? I won't buy a car with less than 100,000 miles on it. I'm cheap, so I want something that I can take from 116,000 to 350,000 without spending much on it. I drive a Japanese designed car made in Canada with an American name. So what do I call my car?
You bring up a good point. Here in S.A. Chevrolets are simply re-branded Hyundais with some markup for the Chevy brand. I do say though that apart from cases like that you take the brand (design) as the home country. Jaguar is part of PAG which is owned by Ford, but it is definitely still a British car. Lambo is owned by Audi but apart from upping trim-and-fitting quality it is still very much an Italian car. Things will change over the years as most of these aquasitions are still fresh and haven't had time to change the bought brand. Remember when Jap meant crap? Toyota proves that wrong, very reliable and well built cars. regards, Paul Watson South Africa Michael Dunn wrote: "except the sod who voted this a 1, NO SOUP FOR YOU" Crikey! ain't life grand?
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You say that if there is only one "American" accent. (by which you are obviously excluding all of Canada) There are 3 major different accents in the US (southern is the most recognizable, but the north and the middle are different), and each one has many many sub accents. Its not as bad as England where some people can tell which block you live on by your accent, but a good ear can guess which state someone lives in, with a typical error of being off by the by the next state over. Linguists study this. It is a interesting subject, though I'm not sure if it has any use. (There are other subjects that linguists study there are more useful, but overall I find them less interesting)
To me, a Yankee northern accent is the most recognizable. Jeff Martin Triple20 Software
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You say that if there is only one "American" accent. (by which you are obviously excluding all of Canada) There are 3 major different accents in the US (southern is the most recognizable, but the north and the middle are different), and each one has many many sub accents. Its not as bad as England where some people can tell which block you live on by your accent, but a good ear can guess which state someone lives in, with a typical error of being off by the by the next state over. Linguists study this. It is a interesting subject, though I'm not sure if it has any use. (There are other subjects that linguists study there are more useful, but overall I find them less interesting)
You're quite right, there are a whole bunch of American accents. I'm familiar with the Southern accent. In Canada we have a few different accents too: there's the east coasters and the quebecois, both of which are very distinct.
I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours. ~Stephen Roberts
« eikonoklastes »
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LOL - did you write this ? It's just as funny as the original. But you can't seriously tell me there's a difference between Canadian and US accents ? Christian I have several lifelong friends that are New Yorkers but I have always gravitated toward the weirdo's. - Richard Stringer
Eugenicists don't have the right to express themselves. You belong in a cell.
