And you thought BT were bad
-
Apparently someone wrote this letter of complaint to NTL (a cable operator in Britain). -------------------------------------------------- Dear Cretins, I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and telephone. During this three-month period I have encountered inadequacy of service which I had not previously considered possible, as well as ignorance and stupidity of monolithic proportions. Please allow me to provide specific details, so that you can either pursue your professional prerogative, and seek to rectify these difficulties - or more likely (I suspect) so that you can have some entertaining reading material as you while away the working day smoking B&H and drinking vendor-coffee on the bog in your office: My initial installation was cancelled without warning, resulting in my spending an entire Saturday sitting on my fat arse waiting for your technician to arrive. When he did not arrive, I spent a further 57 minutes listening to your infuriating hold music, and the even more annoying Scottish robot woman telling me to look at your helpful website.... HOW? I alleviated the boredom by playing with my testicles for a few minutes - an activity at which you are no-doubt both familiar and highly adept. The rescheduled installation then took place some two weeks later, although the technician did forget to bring a number of vital tools - such as a drill-bit, and his cerebrum. Two weeks later, my cable modem had still not arrived. After 15 telephone calls over 4 weeks my modem arrived... six weeks after I had requested it, and begun to pay for it. I estimate your internet servers downtime is roughly 35%... hours between about 6pm -midnight, Mon-Fri, and most of the weekend. I am still waiting for my telephone connection. I have made 9 calls on my mobile to your no-help line, and have been unhelpfully transferred to a variety of disinterested individuals, who are it seems also highly skilled bollock jugglers. I have been informed that a telephone line is available (and someone will call me back); that I will be transferred to someone who knows whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been cut off); that I will be transferred to someone (and then been redirected to an answer machine informing me that your office is closed); that I will be transferred to someone and then been directed to the irritating Scottish robot woman...and several other variations on this theme. Doubtless you are no-longer reading th
Yeah, I did give NTL a try before BTopenworld... :suss: :laugh: (joke) ____________________ David Wulff hu·mour Pronunciation Key (hymr) n. & v. Chiefly British Dave's Code Project Screensaver and Wallpaper page.
-
This was posted at The Register site ages ago - someone made it up I think.
Faith. Believing in something you *know* isn't true.
Robert Edward Caldecott wrote: someone made it up I think. Even if it was made up, it doesnt take the humour out of it :-D
Jonny Newman Liverpool, UK Sonork: 16257:Jonny Newman MSN Msngr: jonathann4@hotmail.com ICQ: 37606329 and now..... nonny@nonny.com I'm out there! Feel free to contact me about anything.
-
Apparently someone wrote this letter of complaint to NTL (a cable operator in Britain). -------------------------------------------------- Dear Cretins, I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and telephone. During this three-month period I have encountered inadequacy of service which I had not previously considered possible, as well as ignorance and stupidity of monolithic proportions. Please allow me to provide specific details, so that you can either pursue your professional prerogative, and seek to rectify these difficulties - or more likely (I suspect) so that you can have some entertaining reading material as you while away the working day smoking B&H and drinking vendor-coffee on the bog in your office: My initial installation was cancelled without warning, resulting in my spending an entire Saturday sitting on my fat arse waiting for your technician to arrive. When he did not arrive, I spent a further 57 minutes listening to your infuriating hold music, and the even more annoying Scottish robot woman telling me to look at your helpful website.... HOW? I alleviated the boredom by playing with my testicles for a few minutes - an activity at which you are no-doubt both familiar and highly adept. The rescheduled installation then took place some two weeks later, although the technician did forget to bring a number of vital tools - such as a drill-bit, and his cerebrum. Two weeks later, my cable modem had still not arrived. After 15 telephone calls over 4 weeks my modem arrived... six weeks after I had requested it, and begun to pay for it. I estimate your internet servers downtime is roughly 35%... hours between about 6pm -midnight, Mon-Fri, and most of the weekend. I am still waiting for my telephone connection. I have made 9 calls on my mobile to your no-help line, and have been unhelpfully transferred to a variety of disinterested individuals, who are it seems also highly skilled bollock jugglers. I have been informed that a telephone line is available (and someone will call me back); that I will be transferred to someone who knows whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been cut off); that I will be transferred to someone (and then been redirected to an answer machine informing me that your office is closed); that I will be transferred to someone and then been directed to the irritating Scottish robot woman...and several other variations on this theme. Doubtless you are no-longer reading th
-
Yeah, I did give NTL a try before BTopenworld... :suss: :laugh: (joke) ____________________ David Wulff hu·mour Pronunciation Key (hymr) n. & v. Chiefly British Dave's Code Project Screensaver and Wallpaper page.
-
It would be even funnier if some poor schmuck at NTL actually received this. I have dealt with NTL before and they are W*NKERS.
Faith. Believing in something you *know* isn't true.
Robert Edward Caldecott wrote: It would be even funnier if some poor schmuck at NTL actually received this They prolly have a filter that sends email like this to the newest member of the team. ;)
Jonny Newman Liverpool, UK Sonork: 16257:Jonny Newman MSN Msngr: jonathann4@hotmail.com ICQ: 37606329 and now..... nonny@nonny.com I'm out there! Feel free to contact me about anything.
-
Robert Edward Caldecott wrote: someone made it up I think. Even if it was made up, it doesnt take the humour out of it :-D
Jonny Newman Liverpool, UK Sonork: 16257:Jonny Newman MSN Msngr: jonathann4@hotmail.com ICQ: 37606329 and now..... nonny@nonny.com I'm out there! Feel free to contact me about anything.
-
Got my ADSL connection on Wednesday and it rocks. And I live 50 miles outside of London. Woohoo! How far is the nearest exchange to Tiverton? Or do you have one but BT won't install the equipment?
Faith. Believing in something you *know* isn't true.
Robert Edward Caldecott wrote: How far is the nearest exchange to Tiverton? Or do you have one but BT won't install the equipment? The nearest exchange... hmmm... let me see... that would be the Tiverton exchange, maybe? ;P And yes, BT won't install the equipment, though they will apparently give a definate yes or (more likely) no at the end of the month. ____________________ David Wulff hu·mour Pronunciation Key (hymr) n. & v. Chiefly British Dave's Code Project Screensaver and Wallpaper page.
-
I think the person who wrote the letter lives in Britain. Is Britain a developing country?
MS le Roux wrote: Is Britain a developing country? Not yet, but we're hopeful... "What is it?" and he said, "I don't know. Let's kill it." - Ed Gadziemski
-
Apparently someone wrote this letter of complaint to NTL (a cable operator in Britain). -------------------------------------------------- Dear Cretins, I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and telephone. During this three-month period I have encountered inadequacy of service which I had not previously considered possible, as well as ignorance and stupidity of monolithic proportions. Please allow me to provide specific details, so that you can either pursue your professional prerogative, and seek to rectify these difficulties - or more likely (I suspect) so that you can have some entertaining reading material as you while away the working day smoking B&H and drinking vendor-coffee on the bog in your office: My initial installation was cancelled without warning, resulting in my spending an entire Saturday sitting on my fat arse waiting for your technician to arrive. When he did not arrive, I spent a further 57 minutes listening to your infuriating hold music, and the even more annoying Scottish robot woman telling me to look at your helpful website.... HOW? I alleviated the boredom by playing with my testicles for a few minutes - an activity at which you are no-doubt both familiar and highly adept. The rescheduled installation then took place some two weeks later, although the technician did forget to bring a number of vital tools - such as a drill-bit, and his cerebrum. Two weeks later, my cable modem had still not arrived. After 15 telephone calls over 4 weeks my modem arrived... six weeks after I had requested it, and begun to pay for it. I estimate your internet servers downtime is roughly 35%... hours between about 6pm -midnight, Mon-Fri, and most of the weekend. I am still waiting for my telephone connection. I have made 9 calls on my mobile to your no-help line, and have been unhelpfully transferred to a variety of disinterested individuals, who are it seems also highly skilled bollock jugglers. I have been informed that a telephone line is available (and someone will call me back); that I will be transferred to someone who knows whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been cut off); that I will be transferred to someone (and then been redirected to an answer machine informing me that your office is closed); that I will be transferred to someone and then been directed to the irritating Scottish robot woman...and several other variations on this theme. Doubtless you are no-longer reading th
I only thank god everything NTL have supplied me works. Their customer service is absoluetly appauling - you can't understand how bad it is until you try phoning them for something. My sister has recently moved into a new house. She had to phone NTL to try and get a phone line installed there (previous tennents were BT). It took 2 weeks to finally get through to somebody after phoning many times every day and being put on hold and then being disconnected. It's like they don't want your custom or something. Simon I need your clothes, your boots, and your copy of VS.NET. Sonork ID 100.10024 C++ : The slag of all languages
-
Robert Edward Caldecott wrote: How far is the nearest exchange to Tiverton? Or do you have one but BT won't install the equipment? The nearest exchange... hmmm... let me see... that would be the Tiverton exchange, maybe? ;P And yes, BT won't install the equipment, though they will apparently give a definate yes or (more likely) no at the end of the month. ____________________ David Wulff hu·mour Pronunciation Key (hymr) n. & v. Chiefly British Dave's Code Project Screensaver and Wallpaper page.
David Wulff wrote: The nearest exchange... hmmm... let me see... that would be the Tiverton exchange, maybe? Your nearest exchange is in India? ;P Simon I need your clothes, your boots, and your copy of VS.NET. Sonork ID 100.10024 C++ : The slag of all languages