The Diagnosing Computer
-
A man complained to his friends "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00." The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow ... Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy laborand it will be better in two weeks. Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed out the following analysis:
- Your tap water is too hard ... Get a water softener.
- Your dog has worms ... Give him vitamins.
- Your daughter's on drugs ... Put her in rehab.
- Your wife's pregnant ... It's not yours---get a lawyer.
- And if you don't stop jerking off ... Your tennis elbow will never get better
Why not throw away a dime? I throw away ten pennies all the time.
-
A man complained to his friends "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00." The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow ... Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy laborand it will be better in two weeks. Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed out the following analysis:
- Your tap water is too hard ... Get a water softener.
- Your dog has worms ... Give him vitamins.
- Your daughter's on drugs ... Put her in rehab.
- Your wife's pregnant ... It's not yours---get a lawyer.
- And if you don't stop jerking off ... Your tennis elbow will never get better
Why not throw away a dime? I throw away ten pennies all the time.
:laugh: Jeremy L. Falcon Homepage : Sonork = 100.16311
"But everybody darlin' sometimes bites the hand that feeds." "Remember in this game we call life that no one said it's fair." "Just because you're winnin' don't mean you're the lucky ones." Song: Breakdown - Album: Use Your Illusion II - Artist: Guns N' Roses -
A man complained to his friends "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00." The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow ... Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy laborand it will be better in two weeks. Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed out the following analysis:
- Your tap water is too hard ... Get a water softener.
- Your dog has worms ... Give him vitamins.
- Your daughter's on drugs ... Put her in rehab.
- Your wife's pregnant ... It's not yours---get a lawyer.
- And if you don't stop jerking off ... Your tennis elbow will never get better
Why not throw away a dime? I throw away ten pennies all the time.
:laugh: :laugh: It's not new, but I never tire of the classics!! Thanks! I Drowned Schroedinger's Stupid Cat!
-
A man complained to his friends "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00." The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow ... Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy laborand it will be better in two weeks. Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed out the following analysis:
- Your tap water is too hard ... Get a water softener.
- Your dog has worms ... Give him vitamins.
- Your daughter's on drugs ... Put her in rehab.
- Your wife's pregnant ... It's not yours---get a lawyer.
- And if you don't stop jerking off ... Your tennis elbow will never get better
Why not throw away a dime? I throw away ten pennies all the time.
:-D :laugh: .. cool :-)
"When a friend hurts us, we should write it down in the sand, where the winds of forgiveness get in charge of erasing it away, and when something great happens, we should engrave it in the stone of the memory of the heart, where no wind can erase it" Nish on life [methinks] "It's The Soapbox; topics are optional" Shog 9
-
A man complained to his friends "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00." The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow ... Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy laborand it will be better in two weeks. Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed out the following analysis:
- Your tap water is too hard ... Get a water softener.
- Your dog has worms ... Give him vitamins.
- Your daughter's on drugs ... Put her in rehab.
- Your wife's pregnant ... It's not yours---get a lawyer.
- And if you don't stop jerking off ... Your tennis elbow will never get better
Why not throw away a dime? I throw away ten pennies all the time.
:laugh: :laugh: Oh the clasics are still the best...
"If at first you don't succeed.....you must be installing Windows..."
Windoze CP - Windows without the cr*p (Now with automatic bug eliminator!)
Hey so what if I'm a geek! Byte me!