Q. What's the difference between a woman from Tiverton and a walrus?

[David Wulff]

A. One's got a moustache and smells of fish and the other lives in the sea. Q. How do we know that God is a man? A. Because if God were a woman, sperm would taste like chocolate. Q. What's the difference between PMT and BSE? A. One's a mad cow's disease and the other's an agricultural problem. Q. Why did God give women orgasms? A. So they've got something else to moan about. Q. How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? A. At the circus, the clowns don't talk. Q. How is a man like a used car? A. Both are easy to get, cheap, and unreliable. Q. What's the difference between a woman and a coffin? A. You come in one and go in the other. Q. How do you scare a man? A. Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice. Q. What's a man's idea of a romantic evening? A. A candlelit football stadium. Q. Why did God make man first? A. He didn't want a woman looking over his shoulder. Q. How do you stop a man from raping you? A. Throw him the remote control. Q. What do Kermit the frog and Roseanne Barrs' husband have in common? A. They both enjoy fucking pigs. Q. How many women does it take to change a light bulb? A. None, they just sit there in the dark and bitch. Q. What's the difference between a man and a chimpanzee? A. One is hairy, smelly, and is always scratching its arse and the other's a chimpanzee. Q. Why are hurricanes normally named after women? A. When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them. Q. Why did the man cross the road? A. He heard the chicken was a tart. Q. Why can't you trust a woman? A. How can you trust something that bleeds for five days and doesn't die? Q. What's the best way to a man's heart? A. Through the back with a Stanley knife. Q. What's the difference between a woman with PMT and a pitbull terrier? A. Lipstick. Q. Why does it take one million sperm to fertilise one egg? A. They won't stop to ask directions. Q. Why is a woman like a dog turd? A. The older it is, the easier it is to pick up. Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning? A. They don't have balls to scratch. Q. What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts that a 25 year old doesn't? A. Her navel. Q. Why don't women have men's brains? A. Because they don't have penises to keep them in. Q. Why do men die before their wives? A. They want to. Q. What do electric toy trains and breasts have in common? A. They're usually int

[Le centriste]

David Wulff wrote: Q. How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex? A. Wipe your dick on the curtains. LOLOLOLOL

[Anna Jayne Metcalfe]

David Wulff wrote: Q. Why don't women have men's brains? A. Because they don't have penises to keep them in. David Wulff wrote: Q. Why are hurricanes normally named after women? A. When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them. Hehe I like it. :laugh: Am I right in thinking Tiverton doesn't have much of a social scene then Dave? X| Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

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