I Know It Does No Good

Roger Wright

But once in a while I like to reply to spammers. Tonight I got a spam message from someone who wants me to lose weight. Now, I'm the first to admit that I'm not the sexiest guy on the web, and I probably could stand to trim down a bit. Perhaps an inch off my arse would be an improvement (though I'm told that it's my best side). But trying to impress me with testimonials from people who have lost 120 lbs is definitely not a good approach. Here's my reply; feel free to use it if you get the same spam: "If I lost as much weight as you claim to have, anytime I turned sideways and stuck out my tongue I'd look like a zipper. I don't much mind receiving spam from people who are smart enough to do a little trivial market research and narrow their mailings to include people who might reasonably be expected to need their product or service. I know how to click the little 'X' thingy at the top of the page. But it is really annoying to get crap like this from morons like you who invest no effort in researching your target market. I assume that you have a brain, perhaps even an IQ larger than your belt size. Try a new exercise - use it. I didn't give you my address, and no one else with my permission did either. You are a blanket spammer, and deserve to be out of business faster than you can spell 'lawsuit.' Get a real address, get a real business, and in the meantime fuck off, and don't bother me again. Please feel free to pass that on to whatever slimebag sold you my address. You are scum, lower than an insurance salesman turned lawyer. Get a life, get a job, and quit fantasizing about small animals...." I know that some of you have replied to these cretins... What are some of your best? Nobody wants to read a diary by someone who has not seen the shadow of Bubba on the prison shower wall in front of them!
Paul Watson, on BLOGS and privacy - 1/16/2003

Chris Losinger

I applied to a job at LeadTools a few weeks ago. Yesterday, I got three spams from them - first ever. Apparently, they're spamming job applicants. f'ers. -c

WWT2D?

Fractals

Roger Wright

That's a bad sign, IMO. How would you feel about being associated with a company that engages in such practices? I'd have a hard time with it, though if I was hungry enough, I'd probably take the job. Then I'd work my way as high in the company as I could possibly rise, and try my damndest to stop such behavior. But what a miserable choice to be forced to make!!!:mad: Nobody wants to read a diary by someone who has not seen the shadow of Bubba on the prison shower wall in front of them!
Paul Watson, on BLOGS and privacy - 1/16/2003

HENDRIK R

I don't waste time responsing such sensless crap. Beside the momentary feeling of strength and intellectual superiority I'd possibly enjoy there're two things that prevent me from doing anything: 1) I fear no one will ever read my mail (excepting I publish it on CP;) ) 2) My response makes them know that there's really a nice fellow sitting in front of his screen and reading the f***ing stuff they're sendin. Such they'll never stop sending new mails. But beside that all: I like your way of handling it, too! :)

benjymous

Here's the only time I've replied to spam: (And I set up a new email account to reply from) Clickety[^] -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

Megan Forbes

Roger Wright wrote: I assume that you have a brain, perhaps even an IQ larger than your belt size Possibly not, if they need to lose 120lbs! :laugh:

Throw in a bit of S&M or eye-ball sucking**-Paul Watson on the merits of swearing, sex and obscenities in CP posts** ...they assumed that reasonably intelligent adults would know enough to leave the building if it was burning. Those who did not were, presumably, expendable, and there was less paperwork involved than trying to fire them**-Roger Wright on fire drills at work**

Andreas Saurwein

:) after reading your conversation, I am pretty sure this guy must be a stranded Alien trying to find the equipment for returning to his loving family on §%$&..²# in the year 5012. We should help him.

... you keep forgetting that sheep shagging is not a crime in Australia ...Paul Watson, The Lounge

Roger Wright

:laugh::laugh::laugh: That's great!:-D Nobody wants to read a diary by someone who has not seen the shadow of Bubba on the prison shower wall in front of them!
Paul Watson, on BLOGS and privacy - 1/16/2003

benjymous

Yeah, it's disappointing that he never replied again. I am still totally baffled as to the purpose of the original mail though - it's not traditional spam, as the mail account I replied from has never recieved any other mail (i.e. it didn't instantly get added to a "email accounts that reply" list) My original thought was just that it's someone with a bizarre sense of humour, who might appreciate someone playing along, but that doesn't appear to be true either. The only other option I can think of (bar the "maybe he really is a time traveller" thought) is that it's some kind of coded message, though what it's trying to communicate is beyond me -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

Chris Losinger

i responded "Take me off your list, i applied for a job, not as an opt-in!" or something similar. i had added "and take my resume out of consideration!", but removed it - i need a job :) -c

WWT2D?

Fractals

Roger Wright

Chris Losinger wrote: i had added "and take my resume out of consideration!", but removed it - i need a job Wise choice... I know the feeling! Good luck.:-D Nobody wants to read a diary by someone who has not seen the shadow of Bubba on the prison shower wall in front of them!
Paul Watson, on BLOGS and privacy - 1/16/2003