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(A)JOTD

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Back Room
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  • B benjymous

    (another) joke of the day.. Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. The Prime Minister greets the first patient who replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin race. Aboon them a you take your place. Painch, tripe or thairm. As langs my airm". Tony is confused, so he just grins and moves on to greet the next patient. The patient responds: "Some hae meat and canna eat. And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, so let the Lord be thankit". Even more confused, but trying not to show it, Tony moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant: "Wee sleekit, cowerin, timorous beasty. Thou needna start awa sae hastie, wi bickering brattle". Now alarmed, Tony turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "What kind of facility is this, doctor? Is it a mental ward?" "No, sir," replies the doctor. "This is the serious Burns unit". -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #2

    :~ :~ + X| X|

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    • B benjymous

      (another) joke of the day.. Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. The Prime Minister greets the first patient who replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin race. Aboon them a you take your place. Painch, tripe or thairm. As langs my airm". Tony is confused, so he just grins and moves on to greet the next patient. The patient responds: "Some hae meat and canna eat. And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, so let the Lord be thankit". Even more confused, but trying not to show it, Tony moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant: "Wee sleekit, cowerin, timorous beasty. Thou needna start awa sae hastie, wi bickering brattle". Now alarmed, Tony turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "What kind of facility is this, doctor? Is it a mental ward?" "No, sir," replies the doctor. "This is the serious Burns unit". -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #3

      I don't know why some idiot voted this a one, but I just gave it a gave it a five to compensate. Oh - and :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Elaine (a tigress of scottish ancestry) The tigress is here :-D

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      • L Lost User

        I don't know why some idiot voted this a one, but I just gave it a gave it a five to compensate. Oh - and :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Elaine (a tigress of scottish ancestry) The tigress is here :-D

        B Offline
        B Offline
        benjymous
        wrote on last edited by
        #4

        Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns is, and didn't understand the joke [edit] and someone with a fairly low rating, if your "5" can push the overall score up to 4.2 :) [/edit] Did you remember your haggis on burn's night? I had mine ready in a hutch in my garden and kept it hand fed for weeks before hand to make sure it was nice and plump. Yummy -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

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        • B benjymous

          Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns is, and didn't understand the joke [edit] and someone with a fairly low rating, if your "5" can push the overall score up to 4.2 :) [/edit] Did you remember your haggis on burn's night? I had mine ready in a hutch in my garden and kept it hand fed for weeks before hand to make sure it was nice and plump. Yummy -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

          D Offline
          D Offline
          Debs 0
          wrote on last edited by
          #5

          You eat haggis??? X| I'm sure it's just a huge joke played on us sassenachs to see if we'll fall for all their awful offal (try saying that after a few drams) while they laugh at the thought as they tuck into prime aberdeen angus steaks. Debbie

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          • D Debs 0

            You eat haggis??? X| I'm sure it's just a huge joke played on us sassenachs to see if we'll fall for all their awful offal (try saying that after a few drams) while they laugh at the thought as they tuck into prime aberdeen angus steaks. Debbie

            B Offline
            B Offline
            benjymous
            wrote on last edited by
            #6

            Ok, I'll admit that there is a growing number of people who believe that farming Haggii is just plain cruel (especially the battery farm ones that get force fed, and never get a chance to set foot on the highlands) But they're damned tasty :) Prime aberdeen angus steak is good, too, of course :-D -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

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            • B benjymous

              Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns is, and didn't understand the joke [edit] and someone with a fairly low rating, if your "5" can push the overall score up to 4.2 :) [/edit] Did you remember your haggis on burn's night? I had mine ready in a hutch in my garden and kept it hand fed for weeks before hand to make sure it was nice and plump. Yummy -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

              H Offline
              H Offline
              HENDRIK R
              wrote on last edited by
              #7

              benjymous wrote: Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns is, and didn't understand the joke Well, that applys perfectly to me ... cause I don't know who Burns is. I only know Mr. Burns (The Simpsons), but I fear he's not the one ;) BTW: I'm not the one who rated a 1 ( mentioned only to be safe ;) )

              We are men. We are different. We have only one word for soap. We do not own candles. We have never seen anything of any value in a craft shop. We do not own magazines full of photographs of celebrities with their clothes on. - Steve

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              • B benjymous

                (another) joke of the day.. Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. The Prime Minister greets the first patient who replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin race. Aboon them a you take your place. Painch, tripe or thairm. As langs my airm". Tony is confused, so he just grins and moves on to greet the next patient. The patient responds: "Some hae meat and canna eat. And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, so let the Lord be thankit". Even more confused, but trying not to show it, Tony moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant: "Wee sleekit, cowerin, timorous beasty. Thou needna start awa sae hastie, wi bickering brattle". Now alarmed, Tony turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "What kind of facility is this, doctor? Is it a mental ward?" "No, sir," replies the doctor. "This is the serious Burns unit". -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

                C Offline
                C Offline
                Chris Maunder
                wrote on last edited by
                #8

                :D Heard it before - still funny. (for those confused see this[^]) cheers, Chris Maunder

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                • C Chris Maunder

                  :D Heard it before - still funny. (for those confused see this[^]) cheers, Chris Maunder

                  H Offline
                  H Offline
                  HENDRIK R
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #9

                  Chris Maunder wrote: (for those confused see this[^]) Thx! :rose: I'd no clue what could be funny on that joke, but you helped me out of my hole of ignorance. :)

                  We are men. We are different. We have only one word for soap. We do not own candles. We have never seen anything of any value in a craft shop. We do not own magazines full of photographs of celebrities with their clothes on. - Steve

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                  • B benjymous

                    (another) joke of the day.. Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. The Prime Minister greets the first patient who replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin race. Aboon them a you take your place. Painch, tripe or thairm. As langs my airm". Tony is confused, so he just grins and moves on to greet the next patient. The patient responds: "Some hae meat and canna eat. And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, so let the Lord be thankit". Even more confused, but trying not to show it, Tony moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant: "Wee sleekit, cowerin, timorous beasty. Thou needna start awa sae hastie, wi bickering brattle". Now alarmed, Tony turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "What kind of facility is this, doctor? Is it a mental ward?" "No, sir," replies the doctor. "This is the serious Burns unit". -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

                    R Offline
                    R Offline
                    Roger Wright
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #10

                    benjymous wrote: the serious Burns unit". Oh, yuck!!!! [groan] It is ok for women not to like sports, so long as they nod in the right places and bring beers at the right times.
                    Paul Watson, on Sports - 2/10/2003

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                    • B benjymous

                      Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns is, and didn't understand the joke [edit] and someone with a fairly low rating, if your "5" can push the overall score up to 4.2 :) [/edit] Did you remember your haggis on burn's night? I had mine ready in a hutch in my garden and kept it hand fed for weeks before hand to make sure it was nice and plump. Yummy -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Roger Wright
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #11

                      benjymous wrote: I had mine ready in a hutch in my garden and kept it hand fed for weeks before hand to make sure it was nice and plump. How long have you been raising haggis? I raised naughas in the garage when I was a kid - a great hobby for youngsters, and paid a decent side income, too! But after the mid-70s the market for naugha hides dried up, and I've been looking for another crop ever since. How much can you net from a well-fed, nicely marbled haggi? It is ok for women not to like sports, so long as they nod in the right places and bring beers at the right times.
                      Paul Watson, on Sports - 2/10/2003

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                      • B benjymous

                        Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns is, and didn't understand the joke [edit] and someone with a fairly low rating, if your "5" can push the overall score up to 4.2 :) [/edit] Did you remember your haggis on burn's night? I had mine ready in a hutch in my garden and kept it hand fed for weeks before hand to make sure it was nice and plump. Yummy -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

                        S Offline
                        S Offline
                        Shog9 0
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #12

                        benjymous wrote: Probably some uncultred fool who doesn't know who Burns Well, i can't deny being an uncultured fool, but i do know who Burns is - i just don't care too much for poetry outside of limerics...

                        -------------------------- Shog9 -------------------------- ------- Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time -------

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                        • B benjymous

                          (another) joke of the day.. Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. The Prime Minister greets the first patient who replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin race. Aboon them a you take your place. Painch, tripe or thairm. As langs my airm". Tony is confused, so he just grins and moves on to greet the next patient. The patient responds: "Some hae meat and canna eat. And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, so let the Lord be thankit". Even more confused, but trying not to show it, Tony moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant: "Wee sleekit, cowerin, timorous beasty. Thou needna start awa sae hastie, wi bickering brattle". Now alarmed, Tony turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "What kind of facility is this, doctor? Is it a mental ward?" "No, sir," replies the doctor. "This is the serious Burns unit". -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

                          PJ ArendsP Offline
                          PJ ArendsP Offline
                          PJ Arends
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #13

                          Excellent:-D

                          [

                          ](http://www.canucks.com)Sonork 100.11743 Chicken Little "You're obviously a superstar." - Christian Graus about me - 12 Feb '03 Within you lies the power for good - Use it!

                          Within you lies the power for good; Use it!

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