Child Adoption
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Christian, it is an honourable thing to do to invite somebody elses child into you home as a member of your family. But, please appreciate that many children placed into the adoption procedure do have problems. These problems could include a variety of disabilities, could include those whose parents were unable to cope and there are many reasons why parents are unable to cope, and you will also appreciate that some children are damaged partly by their experiences with or within their family or by the Social Services departments insofar that many children are shipped from family to family and consequently not having stability in their young lives. Before you decide to go into the business of adoption you must think very hard and very objectively as to if you and your partner are suitable for being an adoptive parent. If there are ANY doubts whatsoever, then you should say "no", you should speak with your local Social Services to establish the ground rules for both fostering and adoption as there will be many obstacles you will need to satifactorily clear. Don't think that adoption is an easy life. Without doubt it will interfer with your working and social life insofar that if you work from home your work will no doubt suffer because of the added pressures that a potentially damaged child will bring. And overseas travel might become a no-no. Do not fall into the trap that you will adopt a perfectly normal and healthy child. Although they do exist, the probability of adopting a damaged child is very high and 3rd world options like Madonna's recent experiences is in my opinion a wrongful action. Note earlier I used the word "fostering". Before you consider adoption, try fostering, this is where you are presented usually with short-term care of a child this could be from baby to young adult who are either in the process of going through the adoption process or perhaps temporary care where a parent is unavailable due to, for instance, a short prison sentence or an unexpected hospital/medical emergency. Fostering will give you a good insight into the business of care. BUT don't expect the Social Services to fall over themselves. There will be many hurdles for you and your partner to overcome. And as far as children are concerned, don't fall into the idea that you will be able to pick and choose, that option might never be on the agenda.
Richard A. Abbott wrote:
But, please appreciate that many children placed into the adoption procedure do have problems. These problems could include a variety of disabilities, could include those whose parents were unable to cope and there are many reasons why parents are unable to cope, and you will also appreciate that some children are damaged partly by their experiences with or within their family or by the Social Services departments insofar that many children are shipped from family to family and consequently not having stability in their young lives.
Sure - I appreciate that is probably the case.
Richard A. Abbott wrote:
ou should speak with your local Social Services to establish the ground rules for both fostering and adoption as there will be many obstacles you will need to satifactorily clear.
I was hoping to do it Madonna style;P Seriously, right now it's something I'm thinking about, I was obviously going to talk to the relevant authorities before making any decisions.
Richard A. Abbott wrote:
Without doubt it will interfer with your working and social life insofar that if you work from home your work will no doubt suffer because of the added pressures that a potentially damaged child will bring
Social life ? What's that ? Seriously, if we did do it, I would expect it to bring it's own pressures, different to the ones that came from breeding our own. I would only consider a younger child tho, not a 6 or 10 year old. I'd mostly be thinking about the effect on my own kids.
Richard A. Abbott wrote:
3rd world options like Madonna's recent experiences is in my opinion a wrongful action.
I would tend to agree. ( I was kidding above )
Richard A. Abbott wrote:
Note earlier I used the word "fostering".
Yeah, I know what that is.
Richard A. Abbott wrote:
And as far as children are concerned, don't fall into the idea that you will be able to pick and choose, that option might never be on the agenda.
When we started sponsoring a child, I went to a web site and was presented with pages of pictures of kids in the third world. I thought that was gross. I want to see the child I adopted, but I don't want to look at a galle
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yes...
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
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If your capacity to care for and raise a child exceeds your number of children then adoption would probably make good sense. There is also the option of fostering.
'--8<------------------------ Ex Datis: Duncan Jones Merrion Computing Ltd
I have fostered and it a very rewarding experience...excceding that, it is when done well pro'ly the most rewarding, soul healing experience for the foster child(ren).
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
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I agree with you, but if you can get over the blood line issue, there are actually many benefits for adoption. Such as the female do not have to carry the baby for 10 months, and because for most adoption, by the time you got the baby, the baby is already 6+ months old, the baby's most troubling and high-risk period had passed. -- modified at 6:34 Sunday 12th November, 2006
.jpg wrote:
10 months
10 months?
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
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It depends. We have adopted kids in the family, and they are all mental. I can't help but think that the genetic makeup that led to a child in Western society being abandoned, goes on to cause problems. We want another child, and I am all for adopting a baby from the third world, where the reason for adoption is poverty, or death of parents, and not drug addiction or mental breakdown.
...and sometimes a child is still just a child. It is our job to reach their inner-self and re-ignite that passion called childhood that circumstances have conspired to squash. I agree, some children are so broken, so turned inside-out, that no amount of love and effort can save them. That is a shame. The final nail of destruction for the savable child is that a capable adult would withhold their love and efforts because of that adult's fear of failure...It was an adult who broke that child and it will be an adult who will rescue that child from being a broken adult.
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
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.jpg wrote:
Would you consider child adoption if you have no problems making baby?
My aunt and uncle did it. They had two kids of their own then adopted 5 more.
*** Developer Day 4 in Reading, England on 2nd December 2006 - Registration Now Open *** Upcoming Scottish Developers events: * Developer Day Scotland: are you interested in speaking or attending? My: Website | Blog | Photos
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.jpg wrote:
Would you consider child adoption if you have no problems making baby?
My aunt and uncle did it. They had two kids of their own then adopted 5 more.
*** Developer Day 4 in Reading, England on 2nd December 2006 - Registration Now Open *** Upcoming Scottish Developers events: * Developer Day Scotland: are you interested in speaking or attending? My: Website | Blog | Photos
They need a hand on the farm? Just kidding. In the mid to late 19th century in this country that is how many cities handled the "orphan problem".
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
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Nope, married last January and got 3 step-children/6 grand-step children in the deal. Wouldnt have it any other way:-D
John Hudson Mheghan Hudson on what she did when the router died: Well I tried System Restore :~ :omg: http://www.rainbow-innov.co.uk[^]
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They need a hand on the farm? Just kidding. In the mid to late 19th century in this country that is how many cities handled the "orphan problem".
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
Jerry Hammond wrote:
In the mid to late 19th century in this country that is how many cities handled the "orphan problem".
Sounds similar to the Victorian workhouses as depicted in Charles Dicken's Oliver Twist.
*** Developer Day 4 in Reading, England on 2nd December 2006 - Registration Now Open *** Upcoming Scottish Developers events: * Developer Day Scotland: are you interested in speaking or attending? My: Website | Blog | Photos
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I agree with you, but if you can get over the blood line issue, there are actually many benefits for adoption. Such as the female do not have to carry the baby for 10 months, and because for most adoption, by the time you got the baby, the baby is already 6+ months old, the baby's most troubling and high-risk period had passed. -- modified at 6:34 Sunday 12th November, 2006
.jpg wrote:
I agree with you, but if you can get over the blood line issue, there are actually many benefits for adoption. Such as the female do not have to carry the baby for 10 months, and because for most adoption, by the time you got the baby, the baby is already 6+ months old, the baby's most troubling and high-risk period had passed.
You sound like your buying a car. "You know those things loose 10% the moment you drive them off the lot and you never know if your going to get a lemon."
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Jerry Hammond wrote:
In the mid to late 19th century in this country that is how many cities handled the "orphan problem".
Sounds similar to the Victorian workhouses as depicted in Charles Dicken's Oliver Twist.
*** Developer Day 4 in Reading, England on 2nd December 2006 - Registration Now Open *** Upcoming Scottish Developers events: * Developer Day Scotland: are you interested in speaking or attending? My: Website | Blog | Photos
It is similar except that their were trainloads of children shipped to the mid-west to work on farms...a very docile and cheap work force.
"When I get a little money, I buy books and if any is left, I buy food and clothes." --Erasmus
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Yes and I would like to.
regards, Paul Watson Ireland FeedHenry needs you
eh, stop bugging me about it, give it a couple of days, see what happens.
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Nope, married last January and got 3 step-children/6 grand-step children in the deal. Wouldnt have it any other way:-D
John Hudson Mheghan Hudson on what she did when the router died: Well I tried System Restore :~ :omg: http://www.rainbow-innov.co.uk[^]
There is nothing wrong with bulk purchases ;)
Rocky <>< Latest Code Blog Post: ASP.NET HttpException - Cannot use leading "..".. Latest Tech Blog Post: Enviromission - Solar power of the future?
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I agree with you, but if you can get over the blood line issue, there are actually many benefits for adoption. Such as the female do not have to carry the baby for 10 months, and because for most adoption, by the time you got the baby, the baby is already 6+ months old, the baby's most troubling and high-risk period had passed. -- modified at 6:34 Sunday 12th November, 2006
[I should have realised someone else would see the same analogy just a post or two down....] Its a bit like buying a young second hand car. Someone else has already dealt with the driving off the forecourt depreciation, and initial [*] mechanical problems... Iain. [*] I almost said 'teething problems', just to prove it's a decent analogy.