What would a [insert language] programmer look like?
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you. VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that. C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful. Java: Despite their weasel-like appearance and demeanor, these programmers are kind, generous folk at heart. Web: Functioning alcoholics. SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
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...the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more...
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C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you. VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that. C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful. Java: Despite their weasel-like appearance and demeanor, these programmers are kind, generous folk at heart. Web: Functioning alcoholics. SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
----
...the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more...
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Excellent...feel free to expand on your post!
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
leckey wrote:
feel free to expand on your post!
are you calling him a C# programmer? :suss:
_________________________ Asu no koto o ieba, tenjo de nezumi ga warau. Talk about things of tomorrow and the mice in the ceiling laugh. (Japanese Proverb)
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
Sunrise Wallpaper Project | The StartPage Randomizer | A Random Web Page
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If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
Sunrise Wallpaper Project | The StartPage Randomizer | A Random Web Page
And a ponytail and shorts.
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
From observations at conferences: (and this will probably offend, oh, everyone...) VB: Plus size, bad dress sense. No more doughnuts for you lads. C#: The Khaki and golf shirt crowd. A little bright eyed and bushy tailed for my jaded sensibilities. C++: Lean, intense and balding. Often into rock climbing or mountain climbing DBAs: Large mountain men. Dave and I have fond memories of being in a SQL session and looking in awe at the size of the guys in the room. Clearly they don't just write SQL. They physically wrestle and beat the data out of the SQL servers. WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes. Architects: Odd. You have the feeling they are mentally rearranging your brain to make it work better as they talk to you. And then there are the Aging Rock Stars, the guys who were big a few years ago: Developing paunch, greying hair, wise and sometimes sad or cynical eyes. Excellent to sit next to in keynote talks. Partial to a drink. Sometimes during the keynotes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
VB(VB.NET): innocent looking guy seems to be just out of the college. Not Much Red Bull or Caffeine. C++: Appear egotistical, over confident, aloof personality,. C#(C++ background): A clear aura of superiority, a frustrated look every now and then. C#(VB background): Happy confident, delighted, amazed Java: Chatty, Get along well with other Java people, usually Polite, discuss a lot with others about programming, Usually will have MP3 players JavaScript/Web: Consume more Caffeine, usually Hardworking, every now and then screaming 'Yeah! It worked' DBAs: Irritated, Frustrated, Appear busy (even though if they are not), Slow to respond
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VB(VB.NET): innocent looking guy seems to be just out of the college. Not Much Red Bull or Caffeine. C++: Appear egotistical, over confident, aloof personality,. C#(C++ background): A clear aura of superiority, a frustrated look every now and then. C#(VB background): Happy confident, delighted, amazed Java: Chatty, Get along well with other Java people, usually Polite, discuss a lot with others about programming, Usually will have MP3 players JavaScript/Web: Consume more Caffeine, usually Hardworking, every now and then screaming 'Yeah! It worked' DBAs: Irritated, Frustrated, Appear busy (even though if they are not), Slow to respond
Rama Krishna Vavilala wrote:
'Yeah! It worked'
lol. Web developement surely is Purgatory on Earth sometimes ;)
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
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C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you. VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that. C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful. Java: Despite their weasel-like appearance and demeanor, these programmers are kind, generous folk at heart. Web: Functioning alcoholics. SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
----
...the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more...
Cobol: I don't know, haven't seen one for some time, but he's probably pretty old, may have bought a Carribean island in early 2000.
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And a ponytail and shorts.
Don't forget the suspenders!
"A Journey of a Thousand Rest Stops Begins with a Single Movement"
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
Somewhat related: The subject of "What's the difference between a geek and a nerd?" came up today. Part of my answer can't be posted on the Lounge. My best answer is: Watch "War Games" and see the two guys Matthew Broderick's character goes to for advice; the skinny one is clearly a geek. (Oh, the fat one probably does C/C++, the skinny one probably does Assembly or Fortran (even today)) And watch "Revenge of the Nerds"; while not all the "nerds" are actually Nerds there are several, but no geeks. By now the ones who didn't get hired by Microsoft or DoD are using C#. Come to think of it, no one mentioned Ada yet? Have any Ada programmers been spotted? --| I'm not a geek, I'm a nerd |--
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From observations at conferences: (and this will probably offend, oh, everyone...) VB: Plus size, bad dress sense. No more doughnuts for you lads. C#: The Khaki and golf shirt crowd. A little bright eyed and bushy tailed for my jaded sensibilities. C++: Lean, intense and balding. Often into rock climbing or mountain climbing DBAs: Large mountain men. Dave and I have fond memories of being in a SQL session and looking in awe at the size of the guys in the room. Clearly they don't just write SQL. They physically wrestle and beat the data out of the SQL servers. WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes. Architects: Odd. You have the feeling they are mentally rearranging your brain to make it work better as they talk to you. And then there are the Aging Rock Stars, the guys who were big a few years ago: Developing paunch, greying hair, wise and sometimes sad or cynical eyes. Excellent to sit next to in keynote talks. Partial to a drink. Sometimes during the keynotes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
Chris Maunder wrote:
Developing paunch
You noticed?:^)
"A Journey of a Thousand Rest Stops Begins with a Single Movement"
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From observations at conferences: (and this will probably offend, oh, everyone...) VB: Plus size, bad dress sense. No more doughnuts for you lads. C#: The Khaki and golf shirt crowd. A little bright eyed and bushy tailed for my jaded sensibilities. C++: Lean, intense and balding. Often into rock climbing or mountain climbing DBAs: Large mountain men. Dave and I have fond memories of being in a SQL session and looking in awe at the size of the guys in the room. Clearly they don't just write SQL. They physically wrestle and beat the data out of the SQL servers. WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes. Architects: Odd. You have the feeling they are mentally rearranging your brain to make it work better as they talk to you. And then there are the Aging Rock Stars, the guys who were big a few years ago: Developing paunch, greying hair, wise and sometimes sad or cynical eyes. Excellent to sit next to in keynote talks. Partial to a drink. Sometimes during the keynotes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
Chris Maunder wrote:
WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes.
Good Lord, Chris, did you just describe grown men as precious?
"I hope he can see this, because I'm doing it as hard as I can" - Ignignot
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If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
Sunrise Wallpaper Project | The StartPage Randomizer | A Random Web Page
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Chris Maunder wrote:
WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes.
Good Lord, Chris, did you just describe grown men as precious?
"I hope he can see this, because I'm doing it as hard as I can" - Ignignot
Precious == a little high maintenance, a little delicate sometimes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
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Precious == a little high maintenance, a little delicate sometimes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
Chris Maunder wrote:
Precious == a little high maintenance, a little delicate sometimes.
Ahh... I see. Here, Strawberry Shortcake[^] is precious.
-- Russell Morris Morbo: "WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!"
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Somewhat related: The subject of "What's the difference between a geek and a nerd?" came up today. Part of my answer can't be posted on the Lounge. My best answer is: Watch "War Games" and see the two guys Matthew Broderick's character goes to for advice; the skinny one is clearly a geek. (Oh, the fat one probably does C/C++, the skinny one probably does Assembly or Fortran (even today)) And watch "Revenge of the Nerds"; while not all the "nerds" are actually Nerds there are several, but no geeks. By now the ones who didn't get hired by Microsoft or DoD are using C#. Come to think of it, no one mentioned Ada yet? Have any Ada programmers been spotted? --| I'm not a geek, I'm a nerd |--
A nerd is someone socially challenged with bad dress sense. A geek is someone who obsesses about a topic. "To geek out".
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
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Cobol: I don't know, haven't seen one for some time, but he's probably pretty old, may have bought a Carribean island in early 2000.
Well, my transition like: C->VB6->HTML(Web)->Java->Unix C->VB.NET+C#+ASP.NET->PHP->COBOL(Mainframe) n my mood transition like: C:: Happy WOW! I did my first hello world VB6:: I like Dim and MsgBox HTML:: Marquee is Cool Java:: OOP is awesome Unix:: Socket LAN Chat program uff...UNIX is God .NET:: God Bless MS, finest VS IDE ever made PHP:: Whatever you type, it works...feels you can change the world COBOL:: I want to quit my job, depressed, life has no meaning, hardly sleep at night, life is like black screen. I hate PERFORM, PROCEDURE DIVISION. :(( :(( -- modified at 0:50 Wednesday 14th March, 2007
/**/
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From observations at conferences: (and this will probably offend, oh, everyone...) VB: Plus size, bad dress sense. No more doughnuts for you lads. C#: The Khaki and golf shirt crowd. A little bright eyed and bushy tailed for my jaded sensibilities. C++: Lean, intense and balding. Often into rock climbing or mountain climbing DBAs: Large mountain men. Dave and I have fond memories of being in a SQL session and looking in awe at the size of the guys in the room. Clearly they don't just write SQL. They physically wrestle and beat the data out of the SQL servers. WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes. Architects: Odd. You have the feeling they are mentally rearranging your brain to make it work better as they talk to you. And then there are the Aging Rock Stars, the guys who were big a few years ago: Developing paunch, greying hair, wise and sometimes sad or cynical eyes. Excellent to sit next to in keynote talks. Partial to a drink. Sometimes during the keynotes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
Chris Maunder wrote:
and balding.
:laugh::laugh: , Damn so C++ is the culprit? Chris can you specify the exact version of it? So that I can stop using it.
Press: 1500 to 2,200 messages in just 6 days? How's that possible sir? **Dr.Brad :**Well,I just replied to everything Graus did and then argued with Negus for a bit.