Microsoft Customer Support
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
I dont find that amusing, i bet noone who have used their support does. The question always ends up in the hands of idiots like 'Pamela', and you have to bounce it back and forth a million of times before the person at the other end understands it really is a problem and passes it on to someone with a brain. X| I bet pamela pasted the email straight into the MSDN search box, didnt get any result and sent back the standard reply. /Magnus
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I dont find that amusing, i bet noone who have used their support does. The question always ends up in the hands of idiots like 'Pamela', and you have to bounce it back and forth a million of times before the person at the other end understands it really is a problem and passes it on to someone with a brain. X| I bet pamela pasted the email straight into the MSDN search box, didnt get any result and sent back the standard reply. /Magnus
Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. cheers, Chris Maunder I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?" - @Logan
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Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. cheers, Chris Maunder I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?" - @Logan
I was going to say...some sort of automated response from some artificial intelligence system that couldn't find an answer in it's answer tree. Brigg Thorp Software Engineer Timex Corporation
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I was going to say...some sort of automated response from some artificial intelligence system that couldn't find an answer in it's answer tree. Brigg Thorp Software Engineer Timex Corporation
I dont think so, even if they have some automated system, surely they must have someone there to actually look at the question if the system fails. My experience is that there is no automated system. (it would probably answer the questions better tough) /Magnus
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Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. cheers, Chris Maunder I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?" - @Logan
Chris Maunder wrote: Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. Nish's wife, perhaps. Simon I need your clothes, your boots, and your copy of VS.NET. Sonork ID 100.10024 In these plagued streets of pity, you can buy anything - for $200, anyone can conceive a god on video
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Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. cheers, Chris Maunder I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?" - @Logan
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Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. cheers, Chris Maunder I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?" - @Logan
Is anyone aware of Microsoft using bots? Nick Parker
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
Microsoft Tech Support vs Psychic Friends Network[^] Not sure if this has been posted here before, but since the lounge search option seems to have vanished, there's not much I can do -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
Restated Question: I want to hear something else than Music Vivaldi when calling PSS Steps to reproduce: 1) call Microsoft support 2) if you are not put on hold, put back the receiver, and start at step 1 again usually, 0 repeats are enough to reproduce the problem described below 3) If you're put on hold: listen to the music that is played while you are on hold It is a certain piece by Vivaldi. Observation: The same piece of music is played every every time. The same piece has been played in various support calls over the last five years. Never a different piece has been played Problem: For users that regulary or semi-regulary contact Microsoft Customer support, this causes severe stress, discomfort and general unhappiness. Solution: Change the piece of music that is played when caller is put on hold Suggestion: pick a random section from "The Matrix" soundtrack -------- Give it to Pam! It's not that complicated...
We are ugly but we have the music Leonhard Cohen [sighist]
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
The thing I hate when I'm on hold is having the idiot recording keep interupting the song to tell me my call is important to them every 45 seconds.
"I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?" -xterm
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
You got a response????? Wow! I've been trying for eight years, and they've never answered.:eek: I Drowned Schroedinger's Stupid Cat!
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Actually I'm betting 'Pamela' was a bot. cheers, Chris Maunder I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?" - @Logan
If anyone could write a blonde bot, MS would:laugh: I Drowned Schroedinger's Stupid Cat!
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Microsoft Tech Support vs Psychic Friends Network[^] Not sure if this has been posted here before, but since the lounge search option seems to have vanished, there's not much I can do -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!
It was a while back, but it's worth the repeat:-D I Drowned Schroedinger's Stupid Cat!
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If anyone could write a blonde bot, MS would:laugh: I Drowned Schroedinger's Stupid Cat!
ROFL! ____________________ David Wulff What's the point in life if you can't point and laugh when someone trips over themselves? "Half the reason people switch away from VB is to find out what actually goes on.. and then like me they find out that they weren't quite as good as they thought - they've been nannied." - Alex on being a programmer. You can contact my solicitors, Lambert & Butler, on +44 0870 742 4471 24 hours (10 till 4 Sunday).
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Is anyone aware of Microsoft using bots? Nick Parker
I thought that Bill was a bot :omg: JohnJ http://www.rainbow-innov.co.uk
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Microsoft Tech Support vs Psychic Friends Network[^] Not sure if this has been posted here before, but since the lounge search option seems to have vanished, there's not much I can do -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!
From bmug.org: by Michael Patrick Ellard and Daniel Albert Wright Whoa! Ellard is the last name of my ex-stepfather/ex-guardian. Strange... Jeremy L. Falcon Homepage : Sonork = 100.16311
"Victims falling under chains ~ You hear them crying dying pains The fist of terrors breaking through ~ Now there's nothing you can do" Song: Phantom Lord - Album: Kill 'em All - Artist: Metallica -
I dont find that amusing, i bet noone who have used their support does. The question always ends up in the hands of idiots like 'Pamela', and you have to bounce it back and forth a million of times before the person at the other end understands it really is a problem and passes it on to someone with a brain. X| I bet pamela pasted the email straight into the MSDN search box, didnt get any result and sent back the standard reply. /Magnus
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
It looks like a right answer to me. :-D :-D :-D Best regards, Alexandru Savescu
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I was browsing newsgroup comp.os.ms-windows.programming.win32 and found this wonderful thread posting, which I've reproduced in full below. Enjoy. In my work I sometimes have to contact Microsoft by phone. After doing so several times recently, I sent them this complaint: --- begin --- URL:http://www.microsoft.com/australia/ LANG:English (United States) LOC:AU BR: windows 98/ msie 5.5/en-us Subject: No more Vivaldi, please I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! David --- end --- (I think it's the Four Seasons, which they've had on repeat play since the first time I rang them, which could be 5 years ago or longer). This was their response: --- begin --- Hello David, Thank you for contacting us at Microsoft.com Customer Support. We appreciate the time you spent in writing to us about your concern. We are very sorry but we need more information about your inquiry. Please send us another email and restate your question in a different manner. Let us know exactly what you did step-by-step, and where the process failed. The more specific details you include, the better our chances will be of understanding and resolving your problem. Thank you for your patience. Sincerely, Pamela Microsoft.com Customer Support --- end --- Stephen Kellett -- Memory Validator. Faster Leak Detection, Better Analysis. http://www.softwareverify.com http://www.objmedia.demon.co.uk/rsi.html
Stephen Kellett wrote: I'm tired of hearing the same Vivaldi piece when I ring and I'm put on hold. Please change the record! Sounds like they use the same call-center as BT OpenWorld! Every call involves at least 20 minutes of listening to the same 3 minute section of the Four Seasons repeated ad nauseum. X|
