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Axioms

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  • H Offline
    H Offline
    Harvey Saayman
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    i. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. ii. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. iii. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. iv. On the other hand, you have different fingers. v. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. vi. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse? vii. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. viii. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty. ix. Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it. x. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. xi. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. xii. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged. xiii. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower. xiv. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. xv. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. xvi. Honk if you love peace and quiet. xvii. Pardon my driving, I am reloading. xviii. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? xix. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. xx. It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living. xxi. Just remember ... if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. xxii. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them. xxiv. You can't have everything, where would you put it? xxv. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population. xxvi. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. xxvii. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. xxviii. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. xxix. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. xxx. Shin: A device for finding furniture. xxxi. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools. xxxii. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. xxxiii. It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats. xxxiv. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens. xxxv. I wished the buck stopped here, because I could sure us

    P D E L 4 Replies Last reply
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    • H Harvey Saayman

      i. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. ii. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. iii. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. iv. On the other hand, you have different fingers. v. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. vi. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse? vii. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. viii. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty. ix. Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it. x. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. xi. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. xii. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged. xiii. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower. xiv. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. xv. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. xvi. Honk if you love peace and quiet. xvii. Pardon my driving, I am reloading. xviii. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? xix. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. xx. It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living. xxi. Just remember ... if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. xxii. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them. xxiv. You can't have everything, where would you put it? xxv. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population. xxvi. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. xxvii. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. xxviii. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. xxix. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. xxx. Shin: A device for finding furniture. xxxi. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools. xxxii. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. xxxiii. It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats. xxxiv. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens. xxxv. I wished the buck stopped here, because I could sure us

      P Offline
      P Offline
      phannon86
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      HarveySaayman wrote:

      xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

      ...and in all likelihood they would be driving a BMW/Audi. Apologies to the drivers of those here (big generalisation) but it had to be said. :)

      He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man

      H J 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • H Harvey Saayman

        i. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. ii. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. iii. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. iv. On the other hand, you have different fingers. v. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. vi. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse? vii. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. viii. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty. ix. Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it. x. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. xi. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. xii. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged. xiii. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower. xiv. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. xv. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. xvi. Honk if you love peace and quiet. xvii. Pardon my driving, I am reloading. xviii. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? xix. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. xx. It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living. xxi. Just remember ... if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. xxii. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them. xxiv. You can't have everything, where would you put it? xxv. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population. xxvi. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. xxvii. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. xxviii. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. xxix. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. xxx. Shin: A device for finding furniture. xxxi. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools. xxxii. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. xxxiii. It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats. xxxiv. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens. xxxv. I wished the buck stopped here, because I could sure us

        D Offline
        D Offline
        Dalek Dave
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Throwing Acid around is Wrong, in some peoples eyes. Beer, so ugly girls can have babies. People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw parties.

        ------------------------------------ "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy" - Bob Monkhouse

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • P phannon86

          HarveySaayman wrote:

          xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

          ...and in all likelihood they would be driving a BMW/Audi. Apologies to the drivers of those here (big generalisation) but it had to be said. :)

          He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man

          H Offline
          H Offline
          Harvey Saayman
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

          Harvey Saayman - South Africa Junior Developer .Net, C#, SQL

          you.suck = (you.passion != Programming)

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • H Harvey Saayman

            i. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. ii. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. iii. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. iv. On the other hand, you have different fingers. v. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. vi. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse? vii. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. viii. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty. ix. Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it. x. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. xi. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. xii. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged. xiii. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower. xiv. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. xv. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. xvi. Honk if you love peace and quiet. xvii. Pardon my driving, I am reloading. xviii. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? xix. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. xx. It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living. xxi. Just remember ... if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. xxii. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them. xxiv. You can't have everything, where would you put it? xxv. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population. xxvi. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. xxvii. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. xxviii. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. xxix. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. xxx. Shin: A device for finding furniture. xxxi. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools. xxxii. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. xxxiii. It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats. xxxiv. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens. xxxv. I wished the buck stopped here, because I could sure us

            E Offline
            E Offline
            eyeseetee
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Some more http://www.sullivanet.com/misc/looneybin/deep.htm

            S 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • H Harvey Saayman

              i. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. ii. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. iii. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. iv. On the other hand, you have different fingers. v. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. vi. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse? vii. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. viii. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty. ix. Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it. x. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. xi. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. xii. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged. xiii. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower. xiv. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. xv. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. xvi. Honk if you love peace and quiet. xvii. Pardon my driving, I am reloading. xviii. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? xix. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. xx. It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living. xxi. Just remember ... if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. xxii. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them. xxiv. You can't have everything, where would you put it? xxv. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population. xxvi. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. xxvii. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. xxviii. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. xxix. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. xxx. Shin: A device for finding furniture. xxxi. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools. xxxii. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. xxxiii. It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats. xxxiv. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens. xxxv. I wished the buck stopped here, because I could sure us

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              L Offline
              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              You sure know roman numbers well :laugh:

              The Developer - CEH

              D 1 Reply Last reply
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              • L Lost User

                You sure know roman numbers well :laugh:

                The Developer - CEH

                D Offline
                D Offline
                Dalek Dave
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Imagine coding in Latin! (Actually, you can't, they had no Zero)

                ------------------------------------ "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy" - Bob Monkhouse

                S 1 Reply Last reply
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                • P phannon86

                  HarveySaayman wrote:

                  xxiii. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

                  ...and in all likelihood they would be driving a BMW/Audi. Apologies to the drivers of those here (big generalisation) but it had to be said. :)

                  He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man

                  J Offline
                  J Offline
                  Jorgen Sigvardsson
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  As a former Audi owner, I'd say you are absolutely right. I would also like to point out that an Audio owner would make the feat possible! :cool: Hah! ;)

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • E eyeseetee

                    Some more http://www.sullivanet.com/misc/looneybin/deep.htm

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    SimulationofSai
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Some are hilarious :laugh: It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere. If "con" is the opposite of "pro", then Congress is the opposite of progress. The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?:laugh: Still haven't finished reading yet.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • D Dalek Dave

                      Imagine coding in Latin! (Actually, you can't, they had no Zero)

                      ------------------------------------ "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy" - Bob Monkhouse

                      S Offline
                      S Offline
                      Scorch
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      cout << "Salve Mundo!\n"; :laugh:

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