Another low quality cat joke
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A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he arrived home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further, and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answered, "Put the little bastard on the phone, I'm lost and need directions."
Blog link to be reinstated at a later date.
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A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he arrived home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further, and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answered, "Put the little bastard on the phone, I'm lost and need directions."
Blog link to be reinstated at a later date.
:laugh::laugh::laugh:
"The clue train passed his station without stopping." - John Simmons / outlaw programmer "Real programmers just throw a bunch of 1s and 0s at the computer to see what sticks" - Pete O'Hanlon "Not only do you continue to babble nonsense, you can't even correctly remember the nonsense you babbled just minutes ago." - Rob Graham
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A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he arrived home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further, and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answered, "Put the little bastard on the phone, I'm lost and need directions."
Blog link to be reinstated at a later date.
That was good... and I'm not trying to top it.. but it reminded me of another cat joke: A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They turned on a night light, turned on the answering machine, covered their pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. They phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened the front door to leave their house. The cat they had put out into the yard scooted back into the house. They didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tried to eat the bird. The wife got into the taxi while the husband went back inside to get the cat. The cat ran upstairs, the man in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, the wife didn't want the driver to know the house would be empty for the night. She explained to the taxi driver that her husband would be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good bye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband got into the cab. "Sorry I took so long, he said as they drove away.. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck. Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!" The cabdriver hit a parked car...
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That was good... and I'm not trying to top it.. but it reminded me of another cat joke: A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They turned on a night light, turned on the answering machine, covered their pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. They phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened the front door to leave their house. The cat they had put out into the yard scooted back into the house. They didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tried to eat the bird. The wife got into the taxi while the husband went back inside to get the cat. The cat ran upstairs, the man in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, the wife didn't want the driver to know the house would be empty for the night. She explained to the taxi driver that her husband would be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good bye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband got into the cab. "Sorry I took so long, he said as they drove away.. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck. Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!" The cabdriver hit a parked car...
ROTFLMHO!!! :laugh: :laugh:
A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station.... _______________________________________________________________________________________ My programs never have bugs, they just develop random features. _______________________________________________________________________________________ Computers are so strange, you just yawn good and proper and they've got something new out! R. A.