what men should know
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1. Skid marks are not attractive. Learn to wipe yourself. If you can't, the bathroom has a hamper for dirty clothes, try getting the skid mark underwear in it 1. Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous 1. Don't ask us if your hair is getting thin if you don't want to hear the answer. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it then just do it yourself. 1. If it itches, you might want to use soap and water to clean it first. 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. And finally, Thank you for sleeping on the couch. I was able to sleep without the snoring. ;P
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1. Skid marks are not attractive. Learn to wipe yourself. If you can't, the bathroom has a hamper for dirty clothes, try getting the skid mark underwear in it 1. Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous 1. Don't ask us if your hair is getting thin if you don't want to hear the answer. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it then just do it yourself. 1. If it itches, you might want to use soap and water to clean it first. 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. And finally, Thank you for sleeping on the couch. I was able to sleep without the snoring. ;P
notadood wrote: Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous Do you suppose it would help if we had the paper delivered to the bathroom?:-D "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Recursion." "Recursion who?" "Knock, knock..."
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1. Skid marks are not attractive. Learn to wipe yourself. If you can't, the bathroom has a hamper for dirty clothes, try getting the skid mark underwear in it 1. Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous 1. Don't ask us if your hair is getting thin if you don't want to hear the answer. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it then just do it yourself. 1. If it itches, you might want to use soap and water to clean it first. 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. And finally, Thank you for sleeping on the couch. I was able to sleep without the snoring. ;P
notadood wrote: 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. Ok, this one I agree with. BTW, you created an account solely for the purpose of posting this message? Or does this happen to "coincidently" be your first post? What kinda chick would create an account named "notadood". That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
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notadood wrote: Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous Do you suppose it would help if we had the paper delivered to the bathroom?:-D "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Recursion." "Recursion who?" "Knock, knock..."
I hear they are coming out with Internet-enabled toilets that come with flat-panel screens that can show the news or any other reading material. :-D (Actually, that wouldn't be a bad idea... a touch-panel screen or keyboard might *not* be such a good idea in those conditions, though. :-D ) You are special and unique, just like everyone else.
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1. Skid marks are not attractive. Learn to wipe yourself. If you can't, the bathroom has a hamper for dirty clothes, try getting the skid mark underwear in it 1. Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous 1. Don't ask us if your hair is getting thin if you don't want to hear the answer. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it then just do it yourself. 1. If it itches, you might want to use soap and water to clean it first. 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. And finally, Thank you for sleeping on the couch. I was able to sleep without the snoring. ;P
Welcome new member, please tell us local folk a little about yourself. You don't have to, I just noticed your bio was a little short. :) notadood wrote: 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. Oh, so everything in life has to be fair now huh? :laugh: Nick Parker
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I hear they are coming out with Internet-enabled toilets that come with flat-panel screens that can show the news or any other reading material. :-D (Actually, that wouldn't be a bad idea... a touch-panel screen or keyboard might *not* be such a good idea in those conditions, though. :-D ) You are special and unique, just like everyone else.
Navin wrote: Internet-enabled toilets Ah, Nirvana! :rolleyes: Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
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notadood wrote: 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. Ok, this one I agree with. BTW, you created an account solely for the purpose of posting this message? Or does this happen to "coincidently" be your first post? What kinda chick would create an account named "notadood". That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
Jeremy Falcon wrote: That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. here we go again.... ;-) Michael :-) Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana
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Jeremy Falcon wrote: That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. here we go again.... ;-) Michael :-) Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana
Michael P Butler wrote: here we go again.... I know, but if it looks like a book, feels like a book, smells like a book, tastes like a book :confused:... Well, you get the idea. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
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notadood wrote: 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. Ok, this one I agree with. BTW, you created an account solely for the purpose of posting this message? Or does this happen to "coincidently" be your first post? What kinda chick would create an account named "notadood". That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
Maybe a gay guy? bibamus, edamus, cras moriemur
[eat, drink, for tomorrow we die]
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notadood wrote: 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. Ok, this one I agree with. BTW, you created an account solely for the purpose of posting this message? Or does this happen to "coincidently" be your first post? What kinda chick would create an account named "notadood". That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
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I hear they are coming out with Internet-enabled toilets that come with flat-panel screens that can show the news or any other reading material. :-D (Actually, that wouldn't be a bad idea... a touch-panel screen or keyboard might *not* be such a good idea in those conditions, though. :-D ) You are special and unique, just like everyone else.
Navin wrote: or any other reading material Hoo baby ! wow bathroom breaks may get seriously extended....
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Actually I was searching for some SQL DMO code and came across the previous posting. Since there are not many girls who know how to spell SQL much less code DMO, I figured I would join this circus. You know, when in Rome... ;P
Does that mean you are going to walk to the bathroom with a paper under your arm? :)
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Michael P Butler wrote: here we go again.... I know, but if it looks like a book, feels like a book, smells like a book, tastes like a book :confused:... Well, you get the idea. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
well, on the other side... look at the phonetics - notadood -> not-a-dood -> not-a-dude? Who knows :)
int x=1, y=5;
x^=y^=x^=y; // whats the content of x and y now? -
notadood wrote: 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. Ok, this one I agree with. BTW, you created an account solely for the purpose of posting this message? Or does this happen to "coincidently" be your first post? What kinda chick would create an account named "notadood". That's not girly; hence, I don't believe it was created by one. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
Jeremy, I was a bit suspicious myself. Maybe someones girfriend has been having words with them.... Elaine (fluffy tigress emoticon) Would you like to meet my teddy bear ?
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well, on the other side... look at the phonetics - notadood -> not-a-dood -> not-a-dude? Who knows :)
int x=1, y=5;
x^=y^=x^=y; // whats the content of x and y now?But that's my point. Jeremy Falcon Imputek "C# is the answer to a question nobody asked." - Chris Losinger
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1. Skid marks are not attractive. Learn to wipe yourself. If you can't, the bathroom has a hamper for dirty clothes, try getting the skid mark underwear in it 1. Going to the bathroom with a newspaper under your arm at work is more than obvious that you're going to take a dump. be a little less conspicuous 1. Don't ask us if your hair is getting thin if you don't want to hear the answer. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it then just do it yourself. 1. If it itches, you might want to use soap and water to clean it first. 1. "I am in shape. round is a shape" Round means you are fat. lose some weight. Lay off the beer. If you expect us to look like Victoria secret models, you can expect us to want you to look like a soap star. And finally, Thank you for sleeping on the couch. I was able to sleep without the snoring. ;P
- If *she's* not happy, *you're* not happy. 2) If she's not happy for too long, then you're not happy, but with only half your stuff. 3) Never answer a question from a woman that starts out with "Do you think...". They don't care what you think. Besides, no matter how you answer the question, you'll be wrong and/or insensitive. 4) If she complains that you leave the seat up, stop lifting it altogether. After a week or so, lift the seat and leave it up. If she complains again, repeat the cycle. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends
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- If *she's* not happy, *you're* not happy. 2) If she's not happy for too long, then you're not happy, but with only half your stuff. 3) Never answer a question from a woman that starts out with "Do you think...". They don't care what you think. Besides, no matter how you answer the question, you'll be wrong and/or insensitive. 4) If she complains that you leave the seat up, stop lifting it altogether. After a week or so, lift the seat and leave it up. If she complains again, repeat the cycle. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: 3) Never answer a question from a woman that starts out with "Do you think...". They don't care what you think. Besides, no matter how you answer the question, you'll be wrong and/or insensitive. Or you could stop spending time with women who act like children. Ryan Johnston
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well, on the other side... look at the phonetics - notadood -> not-a-dood -> not-a-dude? Who knows :)
int x=1, y=5;
x^=y^=x^=y; // whats the content of x and y now? -
- If *she's* not happy, *you're* not happy. 2) If she's not happy for too long, then you're not happy, but with only half your stuff. 3) Never answer a question from a woman that starts out with "Do you think...". They don't care what you think. Besides, no matter how you answer the question, you'll be wrong and/or insensitive. 4) If she complains that you leave the seat up, stop lifting it altogether. After a week or so, lift the seat and leave it up. If she complains again, repeat the cycle. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: 4) If she complains that you leave the seat up, stop lifting it altogether. After a week or so, lift the seat and leave it up. If she complains again, repeat the cycle. That one is great!! LOL!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: -- LuisR ────────────── Luis Alonso Ramos Chihuahua, Mexico www.luisalonsoramos.com "Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics, I assure you that mine are greater." -- Albert Einstein
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: 3) Never answer a question from a woman that starts out with "Do you think...". They don't care what you think. Besides, no matter how you answer the question, you'll be wrong and/or insensitive. Or you could stop spending time with women who act like children. Ryan Johnston
Why don't you just leave? You're annoying the grown-ups. I guess I should give you fair warning - I'm probably one of the LAST people on CodeProject that you want to piss off. Others can vouch for that... ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends