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PhD Final Exam

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  • C Chris Maunder

    Just found this in my inbox... ======================================================================== THE Ph.D. FINAL EXAM Note: Anyone who has taken a Ph.D. Final Exam will surely remember these very standard kinds of questions. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophica impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubis

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    Xiangyang Liu
    wrote on last edited by
    #5

    Chris Maunder wrote:

    SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world.

    The only sociological problem accompany the end of the world is: There is nobody listening to your problems! :)

    My .NET Business Application Framework My Home Page My Younger Son & His "PET"

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    • C Chris Maunder

      Just found this in my inbox... ======================================================================== THE Ph.D. FINAL EXAM Note: Anyone who has taken a Ph.D. Final Exam will surely remember these very standard kinds of questions. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophica impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubis

      P Offline
      P Offline
      Pete OHanlon
      wrote on last edited by
      #6

      Congratulations for Bob's spiffy new look. He looks ready for a good Irish night out.

      "WPF has many lovers. It's a veritable porn star!" - Josh Smith

      As Braveheart once said, "You can take our freedom but you'll never take our Hobnobs!" - Martin Hughes.

      My blog | My articles | MoXAML PowerToys

      S 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • P Pete OHanlon

        Congratulations for Bob's spiffy new look. He looks ready for a good Irish night out.

        "WPF has many lovers. It's a veritable porn star!" - Josh Smith

        As Braveheart once said, "You can take our freedom but you'll never take our Hobnobs!" - Martin Hughes.

        My blog | My articles | MoXAML PowerToys

        S Offline
        S Offline
        Simon P Stevens
        wrote on last edited by
        #7

        I wonder if tomorrow he'll be drawn with a terrible hang over looking sorry for himself.

        Simon

        D 1 Reply Last reply
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        • S Simon P Stevens

          I wonder if tomorrow he'll be drawn with a terrible hang over looking sorry for himself.

          Simon

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          D Offline
          Douglas Troy
          wrote on last edited by
          #8

          Does that mean that later tonight, Bob will appear with a scantly clad Female alien with questionable morals? :rolleyes:

          V 1 Reply Last reply
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          • D Douglas Troy

            Does that mean that later tonight, Bob will appear with a scantly clad Female alien with questionable morals? :rolleyes:

            V Offline
            V Offline
            Vikram A Punathambekar
            wrote on last edited by
            #9

            Well, :bob:'s gender has never been confirmed in the first place.

            Cheers, Vıkram.

            Carpe Diem.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • C Chris Maunder

              Just found this in my inbox... ======================================================================== THE Ph.D. FINAL EXAM Note: Anyone who has taken a Ph.D. Final Exam will surely remember these very standard kinds of questions. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophica impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubis

              J Offline
              J Offline
              Jim Crafton
              wrote on last edited by
              #10

              HISTORY: Peter I: Got the keys. Remaining 1800 years: various bouts of violence, corruption, carnage, torture, reform, social progress, infidelity, crime, corruption, sloth, grace, and a few moments of genuine good will. MEDICINE: Bah, just pass the brandy... PUBLIC SPEAKING: Klaatu barada nikto! BIOLOGY: See Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arCITMfxvEc[^] MUSIC: Channeling K. Stockhausen, channeling K. Stockhausen, please report to the main observatory. PSYCHOLOGY: Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam blandit mattis leo. Etiam tortor. Nulla tincidunt tempus ligula. Nulla pretium, augue eu feugiat varius, massa augue viverra justo, vel consectetur metus est et quam. Nunc mauris. Ut ac felis. Fusce tempor, purus eget mattis ullamcorper, velit quam tristique orci, et aliquet nisl tellus vel nisl. Vestibulum ante ipsum primis in faucibus orci luctus et ultrices posuere cubilia Curae; Fusce est turpis, ultrices ut, porta et, hendrerit quis, quam. Aliquam at elit. Pellentesque pellentesque laoreet quam. Maecenas porttitor egestas erat. Vestibulum non lacus id diam eleifend tincidunt. Maecenas faucibus metus at risus. Vivamus nisl odio, tristique quis, euismod quis, elementum non, tellus. Sed convallis nulla at libero. Donec at nisl. Ribbus, Longa. Ut ut nunc et risus. Rome Nasr, Jemdet. Gilgamesh nova mensus. Babylon Socrates. Dude, Where's Your Car?. Athens SOCIOLOGY: Dating becomes problematic, general lack of choice, and it's hard to find a Mars bar. On the other hand, parking your car has never been easier. ENGINEERING: Pfft, a disassembled rifle? I studied with Professor Norris, I can tear apart the tiger just by looking at it. ECONOMICS: Line up all the CEO's of every major bank. Shoot them with the previously assembled high power rifle (do I have time for a reload?). Paint a picture in the Cubist style while lecturing on how this was all predetermined as dictated by Quantum physics, leaving room for doubt, as per Prof Heisenberg. POLITICAL SCIENCE: Vladimir, I've got this really cute tiger here I'd like you to meet. Oh, President Chavez says hello, but he's busy holding out for his own economic collapse, or at least trying to see if Fidel will pick up the bill. EPISTEMOLOGY: Whatever, dude! PHYSICS: It's all stuff, see: 2+2=5 It's all p

              R J 2 Replies Last reply
              0
              • C Chris Maunder

                Just found this in my inbox... ======================================================================== THE Ph.D. FINAL EXAM Note: Anyone who has taken a Ph.D. Final Exam will surely remember these very standard kinds of questions. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophica impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubis

                M Offline
                M Offline
                Mustafa Ismail Mustafa
                wrote on last edited by
                #11

                Thanks for the heads up Chris, this should come in handy soon :laugh:

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • C Chris Maunder

                  Just found this in my inbox... ======================================================================== THE Ph.D. FINAL EXAM Note: Anyone who has taken a Ph.D. Final Exam will surely remember these very standard kinds of questions. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophica impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubis

                  R Offline
                  R Offline
                  RichardM1
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #12

                  Schools today are going to hell. Back in my day, the tests were NEVER this easy. ;^)

                  Silver member by constant and unflinching longevity.

                  U 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • C Chris Maunder

                    Just found this in my inbox... ======================================================================== THE Ph.D. FINAL EXAM Note: Anyone who has taken a Ph.D. Final Exam will surely remember these very standard kinds of questions. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately. HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophica impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubis

                    B Offline
                    B Offline
                    bVagadishnu
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #13

                    Chris Maunder wrote:

                    Answer all questions.

                    There are no questions in that entry. :confused::confused::confused:

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • J Jim Crafton

                      HISTORY: Peter I: Got the keys. Remaining 1800 years: various bouts of violence, corruption, carnage, torture, reform, social progress, infidelity, crime, corruption, sloth, grace, and a few moments of genuine good will. MEDICINE: Bah, just pass the brandy... PUBLIC SPEAKING: Klaatu barada nikto! BIOLOGY: See Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arCITMfxvEc[^] MUSIC: Channeling K. Stockhausen, channeling K. Stockhausen, please report to the main observatory. PSYCHOLOGY: Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam blandit mattis leo. Etiam tortor. Nulla tincidunt tempus ligula. Nulla pretium, augue eu feugiat varius, massa augue viverra justo, vel consectetur metus est et quam. Nunc mauris. Ut ac felis. Fusce tempor, purus eget mattis ullamcorper, velit quam tristique orci, et aliquet nisl tellus vel nisl. Vestibulum ante ipsum primis in faucibus orci luctus et ultrices posuere cubilia Curae; Fusce est turpis, ultrices ut, porta et, hendrerit quis, quam. Aliquam at elit. Pellentesque pellentesque laoreet quam. Maecenas porttitor egestas erat. Vestibulum non lacus id diam eleifend tincidunt. Maecenas faucibus metus at risus. Vivamus nisl odio, tristique quis, euismod quis, elementum non, tellus. Sed convallis nulla at libero. Donec at nisl. Ribbus, Longa. Ut ut nunc et risus. Rome Nasr, Jemdet. Gilgamesh nova mensus. Babylon Socrates. Dude, Where's Your Car?. Athens SOCIOLOGY: Dating becomes problematic, general lack of choice, and it's hard to find a Mars bar. On the other hand, parking your car has never been easier. ENGINEERING: Pfft, a disassembled rifle? I studied with Professor Norris, I can tear apart the tiger just by looking at it. ECONOMICS: Line up all the CEO's of every major bank. Shoot them with the previously assembled high power rifle (do I have time for a reload?). Paint a picture in the Cubist style while lecturing on how this was all predetermined as dictated by Quantum physics, leaving room for doubt, as per Prof Heisenberg. POLITICAL SCIENCE: Vladimir, I've got this really cute tiger here I'd like you to meet. Oh, President Chavez says hello, but he's busy holding out for his own economic collapse, or at least trying to see if Fidel will pick up the bill. EPISTEMOLOGY: Whatever, dude! PHYSICS: It's all stuff, see: 2+2=5 It's all p

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      ricmil42
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #14

                      Jim Crafton wrote:

                      PHYSICS: It's all stuff, see: 2+2=5 It's all part of a new kind of science.

                      Actually 2 + 2 does equal 5. For extremely large values of 2. :)

                      J 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • R ricmil42

                        Jim Crafton wrote:

                        PHYSICS: It's all stuff, see: 2+2=5 It's all part of a new kind of science.

                        Actually 2 + 2 does equal 5. For extremely large values of 2. :)

                        J Offline
                        J Offline
                        Jim Crafton
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #15

                        Exactly - were you on the board that approved my PhD?

                        ¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! VCF Blog Just Say No to Web 2 Point Oh

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                        • J Jim Crafton

                          Exactly - were you on the board that approved my PhD?

                          ¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! VCF Blog Just Say No to Web 2 Point Oh

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                          ricmil42
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #16

                          I was the deciding vote!

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                          • J Jim Crafton

                            HISTORY: Peter I: Got the keys. Remaining 1800 years: various bouts of violence, corruption, carnage, torture, reform, social progress, infidelity, crime, corruption, sloth, grace, and a few moments of genuine good will. MEDICINE: Bah, just pass the brandy... PUBLIC SPEAKING: Klaatu barada nikto! BIOLOGY: See Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arCITMfxvEc[^] MUSIC: Channeling K. Stockhausen, channeling K. Stockhausen, please report to the main observatory. PSYCHOLOGY: Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam blandit mattis leo. Etiam tortor. Nulla tincidunt tempus ligula. Nulla pretium, augue eu feugiat varius, massa augue viverra justo, vel consectetur metus est et quam. Nunc mauris. Ut ac felis. Fusce tempor, purus eget mattis ullamcorper, velit quam tristique orci, et aliquet nisl tellus vel nisl. Vestibulum ante ipsum primis in faucibus orci luctus et ultrices posuere cubilia Curae; Fusce est turpis, ultrices ut, porta et, hendrerit quis, quam. Aliquam at elit. Pellentesque pellentesque laoreet quam. Maecenas porttitor egestas erat. Vestibulum non lacus id diam eleifend tincidunt. Maecenas faucibus metus at risus. Vivamus nisl odio, tristique quis, euismod quis, elementum non, tellus. Sed convallis nulla at libero. Donec at nisl. Ribbus, Longa. Ut ut nunc et risus. Rome Nasr, Jemdet. Gilgamesh nova mensus. Babylon Socrates. Dude, Where's Your Car?. Athens SOCIOLOGY: Dating becomes problematic, general lack of choice, and it's hard to find a Mars bar. On the other hand, parking your car has never been easier. ENGINEERING: Pfft, a disassembled rifle? I studied with Professor Norris, I can tear apart the tiger just by looking at it. ECONOMICS: Line up all the CEO's of every major bank. Shoot them with the previously assembled high power rifle (do I have time for a reload?). Paint a picture in the Cubist style while lecturing on how this was all predetermined as dictated by Quantum physics, leaving room for doubt, as per Prof Heisenberg. POLITICAL SCIENCE: Vladimir, I've got this really cute tiger here I'd like you to meet. Oh, President Chavez says hello, but he's busy holding out for his own economic collapse, or at least trying to see if Fidel will pick up the bill. EPISTEMOLOGY: Whatever, dude! PHYSICS: It's all stuff, see: 2+2=5 It's all p

                            J Offline
                            J Offline
                            jara88884
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #17

                            EPISTEMOLOGY: Whatever, dude! Actually 1/4"!

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • R RichardM1

                              Schools today are going to hell. Back in my day, the tests were NEVER this easy. ;^)

                              Silver member by constant and unflinching longevity.

                              U Offline
                              U Offline
                              urbane tiger
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #18

                              In my day PhD exams didn't even exist. Yet another instance of post-modernism, like home-ownership being an unalienable human-right. Next you'll be able to win 'em in a pub raffle - "Want the meat tray, mate, or the PhD in Billy Cart Racing".

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