A Murder is Announced.
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
Dalek Dave wrote:
...someone up the corridor who does know something about them....
...and who should have had it properly secured. :doh: Just sayin', that's all. ;) ;P
The StartPage Randomizer - The Windows Cheerleader - Twitter
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Don't you need to thoroughly scan your network now as well, since it was a networked machine? Couldn't it have put virus files onto other machines on the network?
¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! Personal 3D projects Just Say No to Web 2 Point Blow
Most Trojans require user interaction to be introduced to systems. Social engineering is much quicker, more effective, and requires less complex code. P.T. Barnum understood human nature well.
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I did a minor check around and all seemed fine, nobody else reported opening anything, and once the bad box was off the LAN all was well. I did power down and restart the modem, swtiches and wireless router.
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
Yuck, well sounds like you got lucky. Hopefully you just have the one computer to deal with tomorrow. I sometimes wonder about the need for a license to use a computer, that, or a really profound and complete redesign of how they work.
¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! Personal 3D projects Just Say No to Web 2 Point Blow
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Dalek Dave wrote:
...someone up the corridor who does know something about them....
...and who should have had it properly secured. :doh: Just sayin', that's all. ;) ;P
The StartPage Randomizer - The Windows Cheerleader - Twitter
Everyone who has normal access to them understands, I have trained them that way! This buffoon is the MD, and I deliberately did not put a PC on his desk because he does not know Jack Shit about them. He has a macbook, (therein lies a tale), and that is all he should use so that he can get his emails. He went into the main office and started poking around on it at lunchtime because his mac was in the car and he couldn't be arsed to go and get it. I have given him a bollocking and told him never to touch my computers again!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
Dalek Dave wrote:
Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it.
And you let a manager touch that?
Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in? Developer, Author (Guardians of Xen)
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Most Trojans require user interaction to be introduced to systems. Social engineering is much quicker, more effective, and requires less complex code. P.T. Barnum understood human nature well.
ragnaroknrol wrote:
Most Trojans require user interaction to be introduced to systems.
Woah! Kid sister!
The StartPage Randomizer - The Windows Cheerleader - Twitter
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Dalek Dave wrote:
Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it.
And you let a manager touch that?
Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in? Developer, Author (Guardians of Xen)
Worse! He is the Managing Director! And I didn't let him, he came poking around at lunchtime, when the elves had gone out to play.
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
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Worse! He is the Managing Director! And I didn't let him, he came poking around at lunchtime, when the elves had gone out to play.
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
I think it's time to install a sophisticated, state-of-the-art, security system... One that will thwart the efforts of even the most determined manager... Unplug the keyboard and mouse. Worst case, he'll reboot it. More likely, he'll complain to you that it's broken, and you can take appropriate steps.
Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in? Developer, Author (Guardians of Xen)
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
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Reminds me of the time a fellow developer opened up an email with the I Love You virus. After we got everything fixed I asked him who hell he thought loved him now. C
Oh, I had a boss who looked who looked at "I Love You" and said, "I wonder if it really does what they say..." Yes, it really did. :sigh:
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
Dalek Dave wrote:
a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
I think on this occasion you might be forgiven if you keep the tonic to a minimum, or just leave it in the bottle. My condolences; I suspect you may be working for my former boss who, the night before leaving for a vacation, decided that security was lax and changed all the system passwords. This, in a busy retail store, and no memo to anyone - including the IT guy, me. The only thing that kept the stores open was the fact that I knew HIS special password, and managed to rebuild the security files (much more fun than Windows, an obsolete DOS spinoff called SuperDOS). X|
"A Journey of a Thousand Rest Stops Begins with a Single Movement"
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Worse! He is the Managing Director! And I didn't let him, he came poking around at lunchtime, when the elves had gone out to play.
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
"Windows Key" + L (locks your machine) is your friend. Don't leave your desk without using it.
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes -
Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
This is why the FSM allowed men to invent tools like TrueImage[^] and hourly backups.
And above all things, never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning. --Isaac Asimov Avoid the crowd. Do your own thinking independently. Be the chess player, not the chess piece. --Ralph Charell
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Worse! He is the Managing Director! And I didn't let him, he came poking around at lunchtime, when the elves had gone out to play.
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
Dalek Dave wrote:
And I didn't let him, he came poking around at lunchtime, when the elves had gone out to play.
Sounds really dirty! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Cheers, Vikram. (Cracked not one CCC, but two!)
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
Why wait until home for the G&T?
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
A few requests: Please do arrange a live video feed for all others to learn from... Do make it a point to teach him a lesson after u chop one finger at a time And in the end, make sure that u chop one finger off urs too... coz, u left ur machine unlocked. and the most interesting fact, it was this MD who recruited u... :) :laugh:
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Tomorrow morning I will take great delight in Spiflicating my boss. It is nearly 9.00pm and I am just in the door. Let me tell you why... The correct procedure when a pop-up appears informing you that there are 34 viruses and trojans on your PC and that if you 'Click Here' you will load the software to eradicate them, is to say no thanks and get the hell off my system! Not if you are my MD. If you are he, and are aware that you know nothing about computers, and that there is someone up the corridor who does know something about them, then obviously the correct thing to do is click yes and screw up a computer. Not just any computer, but the PC that is the shared drive for a LAN, and has all the data on it. When a few minutes later he comes to my office and says there are strange things on the screen and he can't access the internet or his mail I suspect the worst. A trip down the corridor confirms my worst suspicions. I first of all try removing it, no dice. I do a system restore, no good either. OK, I do a full back up of all the important files (takes ages), and start tinkering. Meanwhile no-one can get out into internet land, so after half an hour I power down, remove the whole box from the LAN and at least the others can get out. Nothing for it, but Re-install XP, run updates, reload office and put back all the data files, re-establish the box on the LAN, set up all the emails & stuff. All the while I do Muttley Muttering under my breath and concoct weird and painful ways of exacting my revenge. I am going to chop his fingers off for starters. Why were there pop-ups? Because he saw a notification at the top of the screen saying that a pop-up had been blocked and he wanted to know what he was missing. So, for 7 hours I have been fixing this, and finally I am home, to some freshly cooked lasagne and a Very Large Gin and Tonic!!!!
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould
So if you are doing all the work then what the elves are doing?
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail! Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya
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So if you are doing all the work then what the elves are doing?
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail! Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya
My Elves are secretarial and accounts clerks, I am an accountant (Although my title, for what it is worth, is Accounts Office and Administration Manager, it means I am responsible for cleaning up behind people when they screw up), the tech side is something I fell into because I am the only one who knows a lot about it. So you see, my Elves would be of very little help. (I mean in a technical situation; they are very good at their normal jobs, esp after I give each of them some specialist training in differant aspects of accounts and admin practise)
------------------------------------ In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms. Stephen J Gould