How Many Germans Does it Take to Change a Lightbulb?
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A mathematician, a physicist and a chemist have agreed to be tested in a psychological experiment. The psychologist explains the setup. "As you probably only too aware, there is a smoking-hot naked woman in the centre of the room. For the purposes of this test she has agreed to do anything you want when you get to her. The only rule is each step you take towards her, must be half the length of the previous one". The mathematician thinks for a second, then says "I'm out, I can never reach her". The physicist sets off, takes a couple of paces, then leaves saying "the evidence suggests it would take an infinite amount of time to reach her". The Chemist sets off. The pyschologist asks "Why are you going, don't you realise that you can never reach the woman?" The chemist replies "I know, but I can get close enough for experimental purposes".
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
I've heard that joke but usually the 3rd is an engineer and he says "I know, but I can get close enough to be within tolerance."
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One: Because that is the number necessary to do the job* Seeing as we are going into old chestnuts today.... *This joke is much funnier when told by a german
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
Once upon a time 3 engineers were in a car, having trip in a long road inside a desert; a cs engineer, an electronics engineer and a mechanical engineer. Somewhere in the road, the stopped and did not move. The electronics engineer said: "it might be because of wire which brings power to the engine.Let's check the wiring!". The mechanical engineer said: " it might be because of mixture of oil and water inside engine, let's try it.". The cs guy was silent. The other guys looked at him: "What do you guess? what is the problem? ". He replied "Whenever a computer hangs, we just push the Reset button. So, ... Lets just get out and then get into again!"
Behzad
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A mathematician, a physicist and a chemist have agreed to be tested in a psychological experiment. The psychologist explains the setup. "As you probably only too aware, there is a smoking-hot naked woman in the centre of the room. For the purposes of this test she has agreed to do anything you want when you get to her. The only rule is each step you take towards her, must be half the length of the previous one". The mathematician thinks for a second, then says "I'm out, I can never reach her". The physicist sets off, takes a couple of paces, then leaves saying "the evidence suggests it would take an infinite amount of time to reach her". The Chemist sets off. The pyschologist asks "Why are you going, don't you realise that you can never reach the woman?" The chemist replies "I know, but I can get close enough for experimental purposes".
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
while I certainly like the chemists approach (I am dirty by nature ;)) I would humbly suggest ... That is an engineering problem ! You just have to reach the smoking-hot naked woman in one single step ;) or maybe roll, jump, drive or cycle the way ;) Or is it simple the problem of a poet ? Saying something beautiful that will bring her to you ? Okay enough gibberish from me - I will shut up and hmm take a jump to my beautifull girlfriend on the couch :)
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I majored in applied mathematics in college. One of my professors used a similar story to explain the difference between theoretical math and applied math: Take a basketball court. A mathematician stands at one end of the court, an engineer at the other. Tell them that the first person to reach the middle of the court will win a large sum of money, provided that every even step is going backwards half the distance of every odd step. The mathematician will throw up his hands in disgust and leave, knowing that it will take an infinite amount of time to reach the middle. The engineer will start walking back and forth, because he knows that he can easily get close enough as to make no difference.
TechBearSeattle wrote:
knowing that it will take an infinite amount of time to reach the middle
I might be wrong, cause I don't know enough of math, but I don't think this problem is unsolvable (or will take an infinite amount of time). Say that if you advance 1 meter per step, thus you have to take a 0.5 meter step back. After 2 steps, you're at 0.5 meter; at 4 steps, you're at 1m; at 6 steps, you're at 1.5m; etc... Eventually, you'll reach your goal. If every step has to be the half of the previous step, then you'll never get to your destination, unless your destination is one step away from you. Please correct me if I'm wrong. :)
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A mathematician, a physicist and a chemist have agreed to be tested in a psychological experiment. The psychologist explains the setup. "As you probably only too aware, there is a smoking-hot naked woman in the centre of the room. For the purposes of this test she has agreed to do anything you want when you get to her. The only rule is each step you take towards her, must be half the length of the previous one". The mathematician thinks for a second, then says "I'm out, I can never reach her". The physicist sets off, takes a couple of paces, then leaves saying "the evidence suggests it would take an infinite amount of time to reach her". The Chemist sets off. The pyschologist asks "Why are you going, don't you realise that you can never reach the woman?" The chemist replies "I know, but I can get close enough for experimental purposes".
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
Keith Barrow wrote:
The only rule is each step you take towards her, must be half the length of the previous one". The mathematician thinks for a second, then says "I'm out, I can never reach her".
Nitpick: as the problem is stated, you can reach her, since the length of the first step is undefined. So if the first step takes you >= 2/3 the distance, the second step will be >= 1/3 the distance and you'll reach your destination :-O
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A mathematician, a physicist and a chemist have agreed to be tested in a psychological experiment. The psychologist explains the setup. "As you probably only too aware, there is a smoking-hot naked woman in the centre of the room. For the purposes of this test she has agreed to do anything you want when you get to her. The only rule is each step you take towards her, must be half the length of the previous one". The mathematician thinks for a second, then says "I'm out, I can never reach her". The physicist sets off, takes a couple of paces, then leaves saying "the evidence suggests it would take an infinite amount of time to reach her". The Chemist sets off. The pyschologist asks "Why are you going, don't you realise that you can never reach the woman?" The chemist replies "I know, but I can get close enough for experimental purposes".
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
CHEMIST KNOW HOW TO REACT !
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"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein
"As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert
"If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek dissappointment. If you are searching for perfection in yourself, then you seek failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010
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One: Because that is the number necessary to do the job* Seeing as we are going into old chestnuts today.... *This joke is much funnier when told by a german
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
How many Creation Scientists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two: one to change it quickly, and one to point out that no transitional forms occurred at all.How many Darwinians does it take to change a lightbulb?
"Well actually, we won't even TRY to change the bulb. We will simply stop using the room that has the burned out bulb, and start using only rooms with FUNCTIONING bulbs. That way, over time, ...." -
A mathematician, a physicist and a chemist have agreed to be tested in a psychological experiment. The psychologist explains the setup. "As you probably only too aware, there is a smoking-hot naked woman in the centre of the room. For the purposes of this test she has agreed to do anything you want when you get to her. The only rule is each step you take towards her, must be half the length of the previous one". The mathematician thinks for a second, then says "I'm out, I can never reach her". The physicist sets off, takes a couple of paces, then leaves saying "the evidence suggests it would take an infinite amount of time to reach her". The Chemist sets off. The pyschologist asks "Why are you going, don't you realise that you can never reach the woman?" The chemist replies "I know, but I can get close enough for experimental purposes".
Dalek Dave: There are many words that some find offensive, Homosexuality, Alcoholism, Religion, Visual Basic, Manchester United, Butter. Pete o'Hanlon: If it wasn't insulting tools, I'd say you were dumber than a bag of spanners.
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Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb? A1: Let x be the amount of time it takes one mathematician to change one light bulb and {x} be the domain of all available mathematicians.... A2: One. The proof is left up to the student. --- Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, but the lightbulb has to really want to change. --- (Ok, this one is obscure. A vote up to the first person to get this.) Q: How many Lojban speakers does it take to change a broken light bulb? A1: How does one change broken light? A2: Two: one to decide what to change it into, and one to figure out what kind of bulb emits broken light.
While not familiar with Lojban, the joke probably plays on the fact that the expressions (probably?) are non-associative, and without parentheses it is understood as ((broken light) bulb) i.e. a bulb that emits "broken light" (as A2 actually states). The A2 also states that the verb "change" requires a second operand defining the "destination" of changing ("to change from what to what"). Or am I just being pathetic at trying to explain the trivial issue?
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While not familiar with Lojban, the joke probably plays on the fact that the expressions (probably?) are non-associative, and without parentheses it is understood as ((broken light) bulb) i.e. a bulb that emits "broken light" (as A2 actually states). The A2 also states that the verb "change" requires a second operand defining the "destination" of changing ("to change from what to what"). Or am I just being pathetic at trying to explain the trivial issue?