The Two Farmers
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Richard Blythe wrote:
I just seen the "Three Kick Rule" and it reminded me of this one:
The only farmer joke I know would get me sooooooo badly down-voted. :-D
_________________________ John Andrew Holmes "It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others." Shhhhh.... I am not really here. I am a figment of your imagination.... I am still in my cave so this must be an illusion....
:laugh: We'll, at least you would generate some conversation! (Your ratings would sure start moving! :thumbsdown:)
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
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I just seen the "Three Kick Rule" and it reminded me of this one: ----------------------- Two farmers: Joe:suss: and Fred:cool:, were on their way home from picking apples. Fred looked at Joe's apples and said: "Give me two of your apples and we'll have the same amount" Joe looks smug and say's: "Give me two of your apples and I'll have twice as many as you do." ------------------------ Question: How many apples does each farmer presently have?
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
Richard Blythe wrote:
Question: How many apples does each farmer presently have?
Same as they have before... ;P Joe gives 2 apples to Fred Then Fred gives him back 2 apples...
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I just seen the "Three Kick Rule" and it reminded me of this one: ----------------------- Two farmers: Joe:suss: and Fred:cool:, were on their way home from picking apples. Fred looked at Joe's apples and said: "Give me two of your apples and we'll have the same amount" Joe looks smug and say's: "Give me two of your apples and I'll have twice as many as you do." ------------------------ Question: How many apples does each farmer presently have?
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
Fred - 10 Joe - 14 Assuming Fred has 'a' apples and Joe has 'b' apples, here we go -> a + 2 = b - 2 ("Give me two of your apples and we'll have the same amount") b + 2 = 2(a - 2) ("Give me two of your apples and I'll have twice as many as you do.") => (b + 2) = 2(b - 6) b + 2 = 2b - 12 => b = 14 a = 10
The funniest thing about this particular signature is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything it's too late to stop reading it.
modified on Monday, July 12, 2010 12:46 PM
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I just seen the "Three Kick Rule" and it reminded me of this one: ----------------------- Two farmers: Joe:suss: and Fred:cool:, were on their way home from picking apples. Fred looked at Joe's apples and said: "Give me two of your apples and we'll have the same amount" Joe looks smug and say's: "Give me two of your apples and I'll have twice as many as you do." ------------------------ Question: How many apples does each farmer presently have?
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
Jesus H. Christ. No wonder so much software blows goats. The answer is either: Joe has 14 and Fred has 10 because: (14 - 2) == (10 + 2) AND (14 + 2) == 2*(10-2) Or the answer is Fred has 24 and Joe 0 because Joe got his ass kicked for being so smug. [Edit: There were two wrong answers posted when I posted this, thus my comment. You know who you are. ;P]
He said, "Boy I'm just old and lonely, But thank you for your concern, Here's wishing you a Happy New Year." I wished him one back in return.
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I just seen the "Three Kick Rule" and it reminded me of this one: ----------------------- Two farmers: Joe:suss: and Fred:cool:, were on their way home from picking apples. Fred looked at Joe's apples and said: "Give me two of your apples and we'll have the same amount" Joe looks smug and say's: "Give me two of your apples and I'll have twice as many as you do." ------------------------ Question: How many apples does each farmer presently have?
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
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Jesus H. Christ. No wonder so much software blows goats. The answer is either: Joe has 14 and Fred has 10 because: (14 - 2) == (10 + 2) AND (14 + 2) == 2*(10-2) Or the answer is Fred has 24 and Joe 0 because Joe got his ass kicked for being so smug. [Edit: There were two wrong answers posted when I posted this, thus my comment. You know who you are. ;P]
He said, "Boy I'm just old and lonely, But thank you for your concern, Here's wishing you a Happy New Year." I wished him one back in return.
The first is correct but I like the second one! :laugh: :laugh:
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
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I had always pictured you as a farmer. Well, to be more accurate, like part of a farmer. An elderly one at that. I shouldn't prevaricate, I always pictured you as an elderly farmers foreskin. N.B. :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” Why do programmers often confuse Halloween and Christmas? - Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec. Business Myths of the Geek #4 'What you think matters.'
Henry Minute wrote:
I had always pictured you as a farmer.
That was my great-grandfather, he help found the agricultural offices in New Mexico and worked with them to start the agriculture programs at NMSU. ;P
Henry Minute wrote:
Well, to be more accurate, like part of a farmer. An elderly one at that. I shouldn't prevaricate, I always pictured you as an elderly farmers foreskin.
That's my brother. No family resemblance for either of us. ;P ;P
_________________________ John Andrew Holmes "It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others." Shhhhh.... I am not really here. I am a figment of your imagination.... I am still in my cave so this must be an illusion....
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Fred - 10 Joe - 14 Assuming Fred has 'a' apples and Joe has 'b' apples, here we go -> a + 2 = b - 2 ("Give me two of your apples and we'll have the same amount") b + 2 = 2(a - 2) ("Give me two of your apples and I'll have twice as many as you do.") => (b + 2) = 2(b - 6) b + 2 = 2b - 12 => b = 14 a = 10
The funniest thing about this particular signature is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything it's too late to stop reading it.
modified on Monday, July 12, 2010 12:46 PM
They both have infinity apples (My infinite arithmatic is rusty but i belive the formulas work if a and b both equal infinity. Although the logistics of carrying infinity applies in a basket would be tough to figure out.
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You cheat! This is a mind game! :-D
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
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Henry Minute wrote:
I had always pictured you as a farmer.
That was my great-grandfather, he help found the agricultural offices in New Mexico and worked with them to start the agriculture programs at NMSU. ;P
Henry Minute wrote:
Well, to be more accurate, like part of a farmer. An elderly one at that. I shouldn't prevaricate, I always pictured you as an elderly farmers foreskin.
That's my brother. No family resemblance for either of us. ;P ;P
_________________________ John Andrew Holmes "It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others." Shhhhh.... I am not really here. I am a figment of your imagination.... I am still in my cave so this must be an illusion....
I'm gonna tell your brother that you think he's old and wrinkled and full of BS, ;P
Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” Why do programmers often confuse Halloween and Christmas? - Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec. Business Myths of the Geek #4 'What you think matters.'
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You cheat! This is a mind game! :-D
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
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:laugh: We'll, at least you would generate some conversation! (Your ratings would sure start moving! :thumbsdown:)
The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.
Three Army enlisted men were driving down a back country road in a rain-storm, suddenly the road was too muddy and they slid off hitting a large tree and wouldn't start. Looking about they noticed a farm-house, they ran over to the farmhouse to ask for a phone: "Nope no phone." said the farmer. So they asked about a vehicle that could take them to town, "Nope, only got the tractor and it won't run long in this storm." So they asked if there was a place they could stay the night until the storm blew over. "Sure got one room upstairs, but it's only got one bed." The Army men shrugged and sighed and headed upstairs. About this time three Air-Force men were driving down the same road in the rain-storm, suddenly the road was too muddy and they slid off hitting a large tree near one other vehicle and wouldn't start. Looking about they noticed a farm-house, they ran over to the farmhouse to ask for a phone: "Nope no phone." said the farmer. So they asked about a vehicle that could take them to town, "Nope, only got the tractor and it won't run long in this storm." So they asked if there was a place they could stay the night until the storm blew over. "Sure got one room upstairs, but it's only got one bed and three Army fellars are in it already." The Air Force men shrugged and sighed and headed upstairs. About this time three Navy men were driving down the same road in the rain-storm, suddenly the road was too muddy and they slid off hitting a large tree near two other vehicles and wouldn't start. Looking about they noticed a farm-house, they ran over to the farmhouse to ask for a phone: "Nope no phone." said the farmer. So they asked about a vehicle that could take them to town, "Nope, only got the tractor and it won't run long in this storm." So they asked if there was a place they could stay the night until the storm blew over. "Sure got one room upstairs, but it's only got one bed and three Army and three Air-Force fellars are in it already." The Navy men shrugged and sighed and headed upstairs. About this time a beautiful blond in red sports car was driving down the same road in the rain-storm, suddenly the road was too muddy and she slid off hitting a large tree near three other vehicles and wouldn't start. Looking about she noticed a farm-house, she ran over to the farmhouse to ask for a phone: "Nope no phone." said the farmer. So she asked about a vehicle that could take her to town, "Nope, only got the tractor and it won't run long in this storm." So she asked if there was a place she could stay the nigh
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They both have infinity apples (My infinite arithmatic is rusty but i belive the formulas work if a and b both equal infinity. Although the logistics of carrying infinity applies in a basket would be tough to figure out.
Countably infinite to be exact. :)
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How did you get Fred and Joe from J and F? That's the part I'm not getting. :confused:
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I had always pictured you as a farmer. Well, to be more accurate, like part of a farmer. An elderly one at that. I shouldn't prevaricate, I always pictured you as an elderly farmers foreskin. N.B. :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” Why do programmers often confuse Halloween and Christmas? - Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec. Business Myths of the Geek #4 'What you think matters.'
Does it involve two teenagers with their car stuck in the rain? Does it involve the farmers daughter being dead? Does it involve lost boy scouts? Does it involve the ugly mule? Is it the other one about the ugly mule? Does it involve a camel's testicles? (Actually this is a clean one)
Need custom software developed? I do custom programming based primarily on MS tools with an emphasis on C# development and consulting. I also do Android Programming as I find it a refreshing break from the MS. A man said to the universe: "Sir I exist!" "However," replied the universe, "The fact has not created in me
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Does it involve two teenagers with their car stuck in the rain? Does it involve the farmers daughter being dead? Does it involve lost boy scouts? Does it involve the ugly mule? Is it the other one about the ugly mule? Does it involve a camel's testicles? (Actually this is a clean one)
Need custom software developed? I do custom programming based primarily on MS tools with an emphasis on C# development and consulting. I also do Android Programming as I find it a refreshing break from the MS. A man said to the universe: "Sir I exist!" "However," replied the universe, "The fact has not created in me
Ennis Ray Lynch, Jr. wrote:
Does it involve the farmers daughter being dead?
That is the only one that sounds familiar, but I don't remember it off the top of my head. The other's don't even strike a memory, though it is entirely possible I have heard them.... I guess I could google a bit. :)
_________________________ John Andrew Holmes "It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others." Shhhhh.... I am not really here. I am a figment of your imagination.... I am still in my cave so this must be an illusion....
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How did you get Fred and Joe from J and F? That's the part I'm not getting. :confused:
Bassam Abdul-Baki wrote:
How did you get Fred and Joe from J and F? That's the part I'm not getting
Yeah, it's this arbitrary name association based on random alphabets that's been the bane of computer programming this decade! :mad:
Regards, Nish
Blog: blog.voidnish.com Most recent article: An MVVM friendly approach to adding system menu entries in a WPF application
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Richard Blythe wrote:
mind
He used it. He made others (wolfram) do his work. :)
The funniest thing about this particular signature is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything it's too late to stop reading it.
Abhinav S wrote:
He used it. He made others (wolfram) do his work.
Damn college football students.... ;P ;P *ducks* hey, watch where you throw those vegetables! I have an excuse, they used to do that at my college, I refused to take tests for football students so I had to take the bell curve on 20% passing. I usually fell in about top 22-25%, so I didn't pass. :)
_________________________ John Andrew Holmes "It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others." Shhhhh.... I am not really here. I am a figment of your imagination.... I am still in my cave so this must be an illusion....