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  3. A Red Neck Chrismas - times were tough back when I was young

A Red Neck Chrismas - times were tough back when I was young

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • Mike HankeyM Offline
    Mike HankeyM Offline
    Mike Hankey
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    We were a poor family and it was a bone-chilling cold winter. My Daddy asked me what I wanted for Christmas. Knowing full-well that "Santa" couldn't afford the new bicycle I really wanted, I answered, "Well, Dad, I'd like a new pair of corduroy pants and something small to play with, if that's okay." Impatiently, I waited for Christmas morning and of course, I couldn't race downstairs until I could hear Mom and Dad stirring around down there, getting breakfast going. When it was time to open the presents I eagerly tore off the (re-used) wrapping paper and the little home-made bow, lifted the lid and.... There was the most magnificent pair of dark brown corduroy pants I'd ever seen! Mom said, "Try them on, Son, and see if they fit you." I whisked off my pajama bottoms and pulled on my new pants. "Did Santa bring me something small to play with?" I asked. Dad said, "Well, Son, put your hands in the pockets of them there new pants!" I did as directed. The bottoms of both pockets had been cut out!

    I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
    My Site

    H J T 3 Replies Last reply
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    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

      We were a poor family and it was a bone-chilling cold winter. My Daddy asked me what I wanted for Christmas. Knowing full-well that "Santa" couldn't afford the new bicycle I really wanted, I answered, "Well, Dad, I'd like a new pair of corduroy pants and something small to play with, if that's okay." Impatiently, I waited for Christmas morning and of course, I couldn't race downstairs until I could hear Mom and Dad stirring around down there, getting breakfast going. When it was time to open the presents I eagerly tore off the (re-used) wrapping paper and the little home-made bow, lifted the lid and.... There was the most magnificent pair of dark brown corduroy pants I'd ever seen! Mom said, "Try them on, Son, and see if they fit you." I whisked off my pajama bottoms and pulled on my new pants. "Did Santa bring me something small to play with?" I asked. Dad said, "Well, Son, put your hands in the pockets of them there new pants!" I did as directed. The bottoms of both pockets had been cut out!

      I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
      My Site

      H Offline
      H Offline
      Henry Minute
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      I assume that the Red Neck in the subject refers to the turkey's neck.

      Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.”

      D 1 Reply Last reply
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      • H Henry Minute

        I assume that the Red Neck in the subject refers to the turkey's neck.

        Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.”

        D Offline
        D Offline
        Dalek Dave
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Did you have to strangle your own turkey?

        ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[

        H 1 Reply Last reply
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        • D Dalek Dave

          Did you have to strangle your own turkey?

          ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[

          H Offline
          H Offline
          Henry Minute
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          No, young Fred did the decent thing and came ready strangled. His neck, however helped make some excellent gravy.

          Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.”

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          • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

            We were a poor family and it was a bone-chilling cold winter. My Daddy asked me what I wanted for Christmas. Knowing full-well that "Santa" couldn't afford the new bicycle I really wanted, I answered, "Well, Dad, I'd like a new pair of corduroy pants and something small to play with, if that's okay." Impatiently, I waited for Christmas morning and of course, I couldn't race downstairs until I could hear Mom and Dad stirring around down there, getting breakfast going. When it was time to open the presents I eagerly tore off the (re-used) wrapping paper and the little home-made bow, lifted the lid and.... There was the most magnificent pair of dark brown corduroy pants I'd ever seen! Mom said, "Try them on, Son, and see if they fit you." I whisked off my pajama bottoms and pulled on my new pants. "Did Santa bring me something small to play with?" I asked. Dad said, "Well, Son, put your hands in the pockets of them there new pants!" I did as directed. The bottoms of both pockets had been cut out!

            I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
            My Site

            J Offline
            J Offline
            Jeff Connelly
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Mike Hankey wrote:

            We were a poor family

            You couldn't even afford a "t" in Christmas. Now that's poor!

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

              We were a poor family and it was a bone-chilling cold winter. My Daddy asked me what I wanted for Christmas. Knowing full-well that "Santa" couldn't afford the new bicycle I really wanted, I answered, "Well, Dad, I'd like a new pair of corduroy pants and something small to play with, if that's okay." Impatiently, I waited for Christmas morning and of course, I couldn't race downstairs until I could hear Mom and Dad stirring around down there, getting breakfast going. When it was time to open the presents I eagerly tore off the (re-used) wrapping paper and the little home-made bow, lifted the lid and.... There was the most magnificent pair of dark brown corduroy pants I'd ever seen! Mom said, "Try them on, Son, and see if they fit you." I whisked off my pajama bottoms and pulled on my new pants. "Did Santa bring me something small to play with?" I asked. Dad said, "Well, Son, put your hands in the pockets of them there new pants!" I did as directed. The bottoms of both pockets had been cut out!

              I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
              My Site

              T Offline
              T Offline
              TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              That's plain gross and stupid.

              Fight Big Government:
              http://obamacareclassaction.com/
              http://obamacaretruth.org/

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