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  4. Gynecologist's Assistant

Gynecologist's Assistant

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Soapbox
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  • B Offline
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    Baji Jabbar
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    A young man goes into the Job Centre in Jacksonville, Florida , and sees a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested he goes to learn more - 'Can you give me some more details about this?' he asks the guy behind the desk. The Job Centre man sorts through his files & replies - 'Oh yes here it is: The job entails you getting the lady patients ready for the gynecologist. You have to help them out of their underwear, lie them down and carefully wash their genital regions. You then apply shaving foam and gently shave off all their pubic hair then rub in soothing oils so that they're ready for the gynecologist's examination. There's an annual salary of $45,000, but you're going to have to go to Oxford, Mississippi. That's about 620 miles fom here.' 'Oh why, is that where the job's is located?' 'No sir - that's where the end of the applicants line is!

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    • B Baji Jabbar

      A young man goes into the Job Centre in Jacksonville, Florida , and sees a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested he goes to learn more - 'Can you give me some more details about this?' he asks the guy behind the desk. The Job Centre man sorts through his files & replies - 'Oh yes here it is: The job entails you getting the lady patients ready for the gynecologist. You have to help them out of their underwear, lie them down and carefully wash their genital regions. You then apply shaving foam and gently shave off all their pubic hair then rub in soothing oils so that they're ready for the gynecologist's examination. There's an annual salary of $45,000, but you're going to have to go to Oxford, Mississippi. That's about 620 miles fom here.' 'Oh why, is that where the job's is located?' 'No sir - that's where the end of the applicants line is!

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      Dalek Dave
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      And go back to the Paleolithic Era, for when that joke was first told.

      ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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      • D Dalek Dave

        And go back to the Paleolithic Era, for when that joke was first told.

        ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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        Baji Jabbar
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        It echoed back to me now only :)

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        • D Dalek Dave

          And go back to the Paleolithic Era, for when that joke was first told.

          ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          go back to the Paleolithic Era

          Hmm, dont think there was an Oxford Missisippi then. DOnt even think there was an Oxford Oxfordshire either for that matter...

          "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

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          • L Lost User

            Dalek Dave wrote:

            go back to the Paleolithic Era

            Hmm, dont think there was an Oxford Missisippi then. DOnt even think there was an Oxford Oxfordshire either for that matter...

            "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

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            Bassam Abdul Baki
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            No, they just had oxen then.

            Web - BM - RSS - Math - LinkedIn

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            • B Bassam Abdul Baki

              No, they just had oxen then.

              Web - BM - RSS - Math - LinkedIn

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              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              ... and a path across a stream... --edit-- oh come on people, put it together! :) --edit-- OK, I give up, its a 'ford' OK? A path across a stream. And this one is where Oxen used to cross, hence Oxford.

              "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

              modified on Tuesday, February 1, 2011 9:47 AM

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              • B Bassam Abdul Baki

                No, they just had oxen then.

                Web - BM - RSS - Math - LinkedIn

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                Lost User
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Bassam Abdul-Baki wrote:

                No, they just had oxen then.

                And interestingly 'oxen' is one of a few words in English which uses the Germanic plural form instead of the French.

                "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

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                • L Lost User

                  Bassam Abdul-Baki wrote:

                  No, they just had oxen then.

                  And interestingly 'oxen' is one of a few words in English which uses the Germanic plural form instead of the French.

                  "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

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                  Dalek Dave
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Or, in fact, the Old English weak declension. Others are Children, Brethren, Kine and Housen.

                  ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                  • D Dalek Dave

                    Or, in fact, the Old English weak declension. Others are Children, Brethren, Kine and Housen.

                    ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                    Lost User
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Kine and Housen? OK, Kine I had tolook up, its a word for a group of animals not a plural, and doesnt end in 'en' so its not a Germanic plural. Housen? When was the last time and place that was used in Britain. 1580? In Winchester?

                    "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

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                    • L Lost User

                      Kine and Housen? OK, Kine I had tolook up, its a word for a group of animals not a plural, and doesnt end in 'en' so its not a Germanic plural. Housen? When was the last time and place that was used in Britain. 1580? In Winchester?

                      "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

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                      Dalek Dave
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      As I stated, it is not the Germanic, but Old English Weak Declension. Try looking that up! And any it is implied by the sounding that it is the same, there tended not to be consistant spelling in those days, so it was all aural. Shoon!

                      ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                      • B Baji Jabbar

                        It echoed back to me now only :)

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                        Sandeep Mewara
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        Me too, so 5ed you. :)

                        Sandeep Mewara [My latest tip/trick] [Forum guidelines]

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                        • D Dalek Dave

                          Or, in fact, the Old English weak declension. Others are Children, Brethren, Kine and Housen.

                          ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                          Oakman
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          IIRC, Old English tended to use "M" not "N" as the final consonant of many plurals, while using "N" as the final consonant for the infinitive form of verbs.

                          “The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” ~ H.L. Mencken

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                          • O Oakman

                            IIRC, Old English tended to use "M" not "N" as the final consonant of many plurals, while using "N" as the final consonant for the infinitive form of verbs.

                            “The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” ~ H.L. Mencken

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                            Dalek Dave
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Took a while to find[^]

                            ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                            • D Dalek Dave

                              As I stated, it is not the Germanic, but Old English Weak Declension. Try looking that up! And any it is implied by the sounding that it is the same, there tended not to be consistant spelling in those days, so it was all aural. Shoon!

                              ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                              Lost User
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              What do verb declensions have to do with nouns Dave? (You are talking to someone who learnt Dutch by the way, which has much of the same structure as old english) As for 'shoon', whats that supposed to be? --edit-- OK, got the link from your reponse to Oakman: http://www.codeproject.com/Messages/3754675/Re-Gynecologists-Assistant.aspx[^] So schoon is a bastardisation of schoenen, makes sense, but kine? Well, thats Scots so is it really English? ;) Eyren has also been attested in kent (Dutch is eiren by comparison) so its not only northern dialect as the wikipage says.

                              "It is a remarkable fact that despite the worldwide expenditure of perhaps US$50 billion since 1990, and the efforts of tens of thousands of scientists worldwide, no human climate signal has yet been detected that is distinct from natural variation." Bob Carter, Research Professor of Geology, James Cook University, Townsville

                              modified on Tuesday, February 1, 2011 11:14 AM

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                              • D Dalek Dave

                                Took a while to find[^]

                                ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC League Table Link CCC Link[^]

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                                Oakman
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                You were not wrong, even about "kine" What i want to know is if the plural of mouse is mice, and the plural of louse is lice, why isn't the plural of spouse. . .

                                “The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” ~ H.L. Mencken

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                                • O Oakman

                                  You were not wrong, even about "kine" What i want to know is if the plural of mouse is mice, and the plural of louse is lice, why isn't the plural of spouse. . .

                                  “The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” ~ H.L. Mencken

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                                  Single Step Debugger
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  The plural of spouse is jail.

                                  There is only one Ashley Judd and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

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                                  • S Single Step Debugger

                                    The plural of spouse is jail.

                                    There is only one Ashley Judd and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

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                                    Oakman
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    Deyan Georgiev wrote:

                                    The plural of spouse is jail.

                                    I've been married three times. Are you suggesting that the "three-time loser" laws have been extended?

                                    “The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” ~ H.L. Mencken

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                                    • O Oakman

                                      Deyan Georgiev wrote:

                                      The plural of spouse is jail.

                                      I've been married three times. Are you suggesting that the "three-time loser" laws have been extended?

                                      “The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” ~ H.L. Mencken

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                                      Single Step Debugger
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Nope, you’ve been punished enough.

                                      There is only one Ashley Judd and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

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