A Job
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In a notorious pub in Govan sat Big Shuggy. A simple man, built like an ox, he was sat at the end of the bar and half way through his usual lunchtime refreshment of twelve or so pints of heavy when a small, gay man entered the bar and sat next to him. After watching Shuggy down another couple of pints, the gay man plucked up the courage to speak to Shug and leaned over to whisper "Would you like a blow job?". Shuggy grabbed him by the throat, dragged him out of the pub, and kicked and punched the man along the street, leaving him a pile of blood and snotters in the gutter. When Shuggy returned to his stool at the bar, the landlord asked what it was the man said which angered Shuggy so much. "I don't know really," said Shuggy, "but it was something about a job."
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In a notorious pub in Govan sat Big Shuggy. A simple man, built like an ox, he was sat at the end of the bar and half way through his usual lunchtime refreshment of twelve or so pints of heavy when a small, gay man entered the bar and sat next to him. After watching Shuggy down another couple of pints, the gay man plucked up the courage to speak to Shug and leaned over to whisper "Would you like a blow job?". Shuggy grabbed him by the throat, dragged him out of the pub, and kicked and punched the man along the street, leaving him a pile of blood and snotters in the gutter. When Shuggy returned to his stool at the bar, the landlord asked what it was the man said which angered Shuggy so much. "I don't know really," said Shuggy, "but it was something about a job."
Just brilliant.
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In a notorious pub in Govan sat Big Shuggy. A simple man, built like an ox, he was sat at the end of the bar and half way through his usual lunchtime refreshment of twelve or so pints of heavy when a small, gay man entered the bar and sat next to him. After watching Shuggy down another couple of pints, the gay man plucked up the courage to speak to Shug and leaned over to whisper "Would you like a blow job?". Shuggy grabbed him by the throat, dragged him out of the pub, and kicked and punched the man along the street, leaving him a pile of blood and snotters in the gutter. When Shuggy returned to his stool at the bar, the landlord asked what it was the man said which angered Shuggy so much. "I don't know really," said Shuggy, "but it was something about a job."
It's old, but good - I first heard it about two Liverpudlians in a pub...
Real men don't use instructions. They are only the manufacturers opinion on how to put the thing together. Digital man: "You are, in short, an idiot with the IQ of an ant and the intellectual capacity of a hose pipe."