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  3. An effortless joke... [modified]

An effortless joke... [modified]

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  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

    If you have to explain a joke it's not worth telling.

    musefan wrote:

    now you may laugh

    NO

    If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^] [My Site]

    J Offline
    J Offline
    Johnny J
    wrote on last edited by
    #36

    Mike Hankey wrote:

    NO

    Sourpuss - grumpyface... ;P

    I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
    -----
    Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
    -----
    Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
    -----
    Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

    Mike HankeyM 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • J Johnny J

      musefan wrote:

      P.S My location is correct

      Really? If you're English then answer me this: What's a spotted dick? 1) What you get after a saturday night on the town with DD 2) The nickname for the pitcher at the local cricket match 3) Some disgusting sponge cake type of desert 4) All of the above

      I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
      -----
      Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
      -----
      Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
      -----
      Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

      modified on Thursday, March 3, 2011 7:48 AM

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #37

      He does not claim to be English, it just says his location is United Kingdom. I'm sure there are plenty of people here with locations that do not match their nationality.

      I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

      J M 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • K Keith Barrow

        Curiously, a lot of teh mistakes he makes in English are those of a Middle-Eastern Person, say from Lebanon for example.

        Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
        -Or-
        A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

        J Offline
        J Offline
        Johnny J
        wrote on last edited by
        #38

        Indeed - but he DID know what a spotted dick was, so he MUST be English... :laugh:

        I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
        -----
        Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
        -----
        Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
        -----
        Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

        K 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • L Lost User

          Please tell me your geographic location while I call some guys at the airforce who still owe me something...

          "I have what could be described as the most wide-open sense of humor on the site, and if I don't think something is funny, then it really isn't." - JSOC, 2011 -----
          "Friar Modest never was a prior" - Italian proverb

          L Offline
          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #39

          Well the joke did bomb.

          Join the cool kids - Come fold with us[^]

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • M musefan

            Why would it not be true? 1. I am clearly a fan of an English born band 2. My previous post joke (which has apparently annoyed people) is based on a popular board game here in England 3. My location says "England"

            Don't vote my posts down just because you don't understand them - if you lack the superior intelligence that I possess then simply walk away

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #40

            musefan wrote:

            3. My location says "England"

            Total fail; your location says United Kingdom, so you obviously cannot be here if you think it is the same as England.

            I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

            K M 2 Replies Last reply
            0
            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

              I'm far enough from Texas for it not to be a problem: he's busy building a submarine, anyway. :laugh:

              Real men don't use instructions. They are only the manufacturers opinion on how to put the thing together. Digital man: "You are, in short, an idiot with the IQ of an ant and the intellectual capacity of a hose pipe."

              L Offline
              L Offline
              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #41

              Better be careful. In my family it has become a tradition to go to Texas when we want to shoot something. The last thing my father shot flew all the way up north over Canada and landed in Alaska. And later I went there as well and shot with some things that went straight up into the stratosphere and pounced upon some unlucky target drone. You never know when you are out of range.

              "I have what could be described as the most wide-open sense of humor on the site, and if I don't think something is funny, then it really isn't." - JSOC, 2011 -----
              "Friar Modest never was a prior" - Italian proverb

              OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • L Lost User

                Johnny J. wrote:

                His profile says England

                No, it says United Kingdom, which is not the same thing.

                I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

                J Offline
                J Offline
                Johnny J
                wrote on last edited by
                #42

                True, but I'd rather stay out of that discussion - If we get into it, then at least I need to bring my lunch... :)

                I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
                -----
                Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
                -----
                Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                -----
                Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • J Johnny J

                  Indeed - but he DID know what a spotted dick was, so he MUST be English... :laugh:

                  I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
                  -----
                  Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
                  -----
                  Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                  -----
                  Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

                  K Offline
                  K Offline
                  Keith Barrow
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #43

                  I stand corrected! And the Pitcher at a cricket match is indeed a pint, though we do fill them from a pitcher. :confused: :laugh:

                  Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                  -Or-
                  A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                    If you have to explain a joke it's not worth telling.

                    musefan wrote:

                    now you may laugh

                    NO

                    If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^] [My Site]

                    M Offline
                    M Offline
                    musefan
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #44

                    Mike Hankey wrote:

                    If you have to explain a joke it's not worth telling.

                    That was the whole point. See the previous lounge topic

                    Don't vote my posts down just because you don't understand them - if you lack the superior intelligence that I possess then simply walk away

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • L Lost User

                      He does not claim to be English, it just says his location is United Kingdom. I'm sure there are plenty of people here with locations that do not match their nationality.

                      I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

                      J Offline
                      J Offline
                      Johnny J
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #45

                      True again - how very wise you are today. BUT:

                      Richard MacCutchan wrote:

                      I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

                      You failed at that?!?!?! :)

                      I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
                      -----
                      Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
                      -----
                      Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                      -----
                      Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

                      L 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • L Lost User

                        Better be careful. In my family it has become a tradition to go to Texas when we want to shoot something. The last thing my father shot flew all the way up north over Canada and landed in Alaska. And later I went there as well and shot with some things that went straight up into the stratosphere and pounced upon some unlucky target drone. You never know when you are out of range.

                        "I have what could be described as the most wide-open sense of humor on the site, and if I don't think something is funny, then it really isn't." - JSOC, 2011 -----
                        "Friar Modest never was a prior" - Italian proverb

                        OriginalGriffO Offline
                        OriginalGriffO Offline
                        OriginalGriff
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #46

                        I thing I'm fairly safe: it would be a declaration of war to shoot me from Texas! And we may have lost the first round, but we would win the rematch! :tongue in cheek smiley:

                        Real men don't use instructions. They are only the manufacturers opinion on how to put the thing together. Digital man: "You are, in short, an idiot with the IQ of an ant and the intellectual capacity of a hose pipe."

                        "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                        "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                        L 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • J Johnny J

                          Mike Hankey wrote:

                          NO

                          Sourpuss - grumpyface... ;P

                          I'm not heavy - I'm KIDNAP RESISTANT...
                          -----
                          Don't tell my folks I'm a computer programmer - They think I'm a piano player in a cat house...
                          -----
                          Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                          -----
                          Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects - Will Rogers, September 7, 1924

                          Mike HankeyM Offline
                          Mike HankeyM Offline
                          Mike Hankey
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #47

                          It shows eh? :mad: ;P

                          If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^] [My Site]

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L Lost User

                            He does not claim to be English, it just says his location is United Kingdom. I'm sure there are plenty of people here with locations that do not match their nationality.

                            I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

                            M Offline
                            M Offline
                            musefan
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #48

                            A good point... thou I am English

                            Don't vote my posts down just because you don't understand them - if you lack the superior intelligence that I possess then simply walk away

                            L 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              musefan wrote:

                              3. My location says "England"

                              Total fail; your location says United Kingdom, so you obviously cannot be here if you think it is the same as England.

                              I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

                              K Offline
                              K Offline
                              Keith Barrow
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #49

                              Why not? Most English people do :-)

                              Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                              -Or-
                              A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                              L 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • M musefan

                                ...for the "too busy to think" people. Knock knock Who’s there? Olivia. Olivia who? Olivia, so get out my house! ...this joke is meant to be funny because "Olivia" sounds like "I live here" as in "I live here, so get out my house!" now you may laugh :laugh:

                                Don't vote my posts down just because you don't understand them - if you lack the superior intelligence that I possess then simply walk away

                                modified on Thursday, March 3, 2011 7:40 AM

                                D Offline
                                D Offline
                                Dan Neely
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #50

                                If you have to explain a joke it's a failure.

                                3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                  I thing I'm fairly safe: it would be a declaration of war to shoot me from Texas! And we may have lost the first round, but we would win the rematch! :tongue in cheek smiley:

                                  Real men don't use instructions. They are only the manufacturers opinion on how to put the thing together. Digital man: "You are, in short, an idiot with the IQ of an ant and the intellectual capacity of a hose pipe."

                                  L Offline
                                  L Offline
                                  Lost User
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #51

                                  Ok Wales is out of range. For now. But the guy who may try to shoot you might take that submarine for a spin :) Edit: That would make a great novel: The Hunt for (enter name of submarine)

                                  "I have what could be described as the most wide-open sense of humor on the site, and if I don't think something is funny, then it really isn't." - JSOC, 2011 -----
                                  "Friar Modest never was a prior" - Italian proverb

                                  OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Lost User

                                    Ok Wales is out of range. For now. But the guy who may try to shoot you might take that submarine for a spin :) Edit: That would make a great novel: The Hunt for (enter name of submarine)

                                    "I have what could be described as the most wide-open sense of humor on the site, and if I don't think something is funny, then it really isn't." - JSOC, 2011 -----
                                    "Friar Modest never was a prior" - Italian proverb

                                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                                    OriginalGriff
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #52

                                    He won't get a very big gun in a four foot model :-D

                                    Real men don't use instructions. They are only the manufacturers opinion on how to put the thing together. Digital man: "You are, in short, an idiot with the IQ of an ant and the intellectual capacity of a hose pipe."

                                    "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                                    "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                                    L 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                      He won't get a very big gun in a four foot model :-D

                                      Real men don't use instructions. They are only the manufacturers opinion on how to put the thing together. Digital man: "You are, in short, an idiot with the IQ of an ant and the intellectual capacity of a hose pipe."

                                      L Offline
                                      L Offline
                                      Lost User
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #53

                                      The model is only the prototype.

                                      "I have what could be described as the most wide-open sense of humor on the site, and if I don't think something is funny, then it really isn't." - JSOC, 2011 -----
                                      "Friar Modest never was a prior" - Italian proverb

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • K Keith Barrow

                                        Curiously, a lot of teh mistakes he makes in English are those of a Middle-Eastern Person, say from Lebanon for example.

                                        Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                                        -Or-
                                        A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                                        M Offline
                                        M Offline
                                        musefan
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #54

                                        what mistakes? I must learn these to better fit in plus its pronounced Lebanon

                                        Don't vote my posts down just because you don't understand them - if you lack the superior intelligence that I possess then simply walk away

                                        K 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • L Lost User

                                          musefan wrote:

                                          3. My location says "England"

                                          Total fail; your location says United Kingdom, so you obviously cannot be here if you think it is the same as England.

                                          I must get a clever new signature for 2011.

                                          M Offline
                                          M Offline
                                          musefan
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #55

                                          Actually I didn't even check my profile. I just went on what the post I was replying to said. And if Stephen Fry has a say on it, you will be surprised how many of the countries of the UK he claims to actually be part of England

                                          Don't vote my posts down just because you don't understand them - if you lack the superior intelligence that I possess then simply walk away

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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