Family IT Support
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Mike Hankey wrote:
savey
You mean "savvy"?
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997I think he was saving her for something and then he dumped her. :)
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Poor spelling will be my downfall.
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
Mike Hankey wrote:
Poo
ur spelling will beemy downfall.FTFY
3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18
Alass you two?
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
I expect many of the posters here act as free IT support for their family members. I do, and have a BIG family! I have had many strange callouts, but the one I had last night takes the biscuit. My father-in-law asked me to drop in to help him setting up his new laptop. He is a gadget freak, so is always buying new kit - I wish I could afford all of the stuff he gets then barely uses! The new laptop (decent spec Toshiba) needed connecting to his wifi printer, user settings transferring from his old laptop, software installing (and Norton removing!) etc etc, but the thing he was most worried about was the quality of the video from the built-in webcam. This was supposedly high spec (3Mp), but when he opened the software, the video feed was very blurry, unfocussed and washed out. He was very displeased with this and asked if he should complain to the manufacturer or take it back to the retailer. After examining the system for a few moments, checking settings etc, I had a brainwave. I peeled the protective plastic film off the bezel and then showed him the very clear video feed in all its glory! Needless to say, he was very sheepish! Can anyone top this?
==================================== Transvestites - Roberts in Disguise! ====================================
My grandma bought a computer recently. She is half in her 70's and cannot even hold the mouse properly. My mother (her daughter), an uncle (her son) and some grandchildren (including me) have repeatedly told her how to send an email. One night she called "I have typed an email to my sister, how can I send it?", "Hey grandma, you have to click the big button that says 'send'", "Yes, I have done that, but my message dissapeared and I have typed it again."... Her sister received the same email three times that evening :laugh: My grandma is the best grandma in the world (all grandchildren agree), so we help her with love. But having to explain this kind of stuff ("No grandma, Google is just Google, no matter if you use IE, FF or Chrome...", my nephew installed all three :doh: ) really can get on your nerves :^) We are lucky she can still use a computer at all though :D
It's an OO world.
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I expect many of the posters here act as free IT support for their family members. I do, and have a BIG family! I have had many strange callouts, but the one I had last night takes the biscuit. My father-in-law asked me to drop in to help him setting up his new laptop. He is a gadget freak, so is always buying new kit - I wish I could afford all of the stuff he gets then barely uses! The new laptop (decent spec Toshiba) needed connecting to his wifi printer, user settings transferring from his old laptop, software installing (and Norton removing!) etc etc, but the thing he was most worried about was the quality of the video from the built-in webcam. This was supposedly high spec (3Mp), but when he opened the software, the video feed was very blurry, unfocussed and washed out. He was very displeased with this and asked if he should complain to the manufacturer or take it back to the retailer. After examining the system for a few moments, checking settings etc, I had a brainwave. I peeled the protective plastic film off the bezel and then showed him the very clear video feed in all its glory! Needless to say, he was very sheepish! Can anyone top this?
==================================== Transvestites - Roberts in Disguise! ====================================
Chris Quinn wrote:
I peeled the protective plastic film off the bezel
And here I was thinking you would have told him to put his glasses on.
People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs
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I expect many of the posters here act as free IT support for their family members. I do, and have a BIG family! I have had many strange callouts, but the one I had last night takes the biscuit. My father-in-law asked me to drop in to help him setting up his new laptop. He is a gadget freak, so is always buying new kit - I wish I could afford all of the stuff he gets then barely uses! The new laptop (decent spec Toshiba) needed connecting to his wifi printer, user settings transferring from his old laptop, software installing (and Norton removing!) etc etc, but the thing he was most worried about was the quality of the video from the built-in webcam. This was supposedly high spec (3Mp), but when he opened the software, the video feed was very blurry, unfocussed and washed out. He was very displeased with this and asked if he should complain to the manufacturer or take it back to the retailer. After examining the system for a few moments, checking settings etc, I had a brainwave. I peeled the protective plastic film off the bezel and then showed him the very clear video feed in all its glory! Needless to say, he was very sheepish! Can anyone top this?
==================================== Transvestites - Roberts in Disguise! ====================================
I had a phone call from my Dad once: Dad: My laptop won't start me: is it plugged in? Dad: yes. me: have you pressed the power button? Dad: yes. me: what happened? Dad: nothing, the screen is still black. me: ok, there's nothing I can do over the phone so. Dad: what? are you sure? can you not log into it remotely to try to fix it. me: no, if it's not powering up, then I can't do anything over the phone. I think it turned out the battery had come loose or something.
Pete
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I expect many of the posters here act as free IT support for their family members. I do, and have a BIG family! I have had many strange callouts, but the one I had last night takes the biscuit. My father-in-law asked me to drop in to help him setting up his new laptop. He is a gadget freak, so is always buying new kit - I wish I could afford all of the stuff he gets then barely uses! The new laptop (decent spec Toshiba) needed connecting to his wifi printer, user settings transferring from his old laptop, software installing (and Norton removing!) etc etc, but the thing he was most worried about was the quality of the video from the built-in webcam. This was supposedly high spec (3Mp), but when he opened the software, the video feed was very blurry, unfocussed and washed out. He was very displeased with this and asked if he should complain to the manufacturer or take it back to the retailer. After examining the system for a few moments, checking settings etc, I had a brainwave. I peeled the protective plastic film off the bezel and then showed him the very clear video feed in all its glory! Needless to say, he was very sheepish! Can anyone top this?
==================================== Transvestites - Roberts in Disguise! ====================================
I'm not sure about topping it but here is a conversation between me and my mother-in-law: Her: I (did a bunch of stuff and erased files). Can you get the E back on my desktop? Me: The E? Do you mean a shortcut to Internet Explorer? Her: No. I want the E that will open my mail. Me: Ok. What do you use for your e-mail? (Thinking I was going to put a shortcut to the proper site) Her: I want it to open the internet. Me: Right. But what site do you want it to open? Her: The internet. Me: I understand, but the internet is a bunch of separate websites. Which one do you want it to open? Her: It needs to open the internet like it always did. Me: What website was the first screen that appears? Her: I don't know it just opens the internet. Me (getting very angry at this point): Ok. But what site on the internet? Imagine I tell you to go to a room in a hotel. You would ask what room. But all I tell you is my room. You don't know which room number I'm in much like I don't know what your default website was. Do you remember any part of what was in the address bar? Her: The address bar is always empty. Me (happy this is almost over): So you just start with a blank page? That's easy enough. Her: No. It always opens the internet. Me (fuming, looking at the clock and ready to leave): You just said the address bar is empty. Her: It is. Fine. Just forget it if you don't want to fix it. I know you know how. Just do it. Me (walks away) Afterwards I found out "the internet" is the website for her company's e-mail and listing stuff. The "address bar" is the google toolbar. When she wants to go to a website, she types the website into the search bar and then clicks the first link in Google. I try not to answer the phone when she calls. Unfortunately, my wife is on her side. But that's a whole other argument involving needing to spend a lot of money on a Mac just to get on the internet. And they wonder why I like video games that involve blowing people up.
Brad Deja Moo - When you feel like you've heard the same bull before.
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Alass you two?
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
I can see that, keep up the good work. :)
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
I'm not sure about topping it but here is a conversation between me and my mother-in-law: Her: I (did a bunch of stuff and erased files). Can you get the E back on my desktop? Me: The E? Do you mean a shortcut to Internet Explorer? Her: No. I want the E that will open my mail. Me: Ok. What do you use for your e-mail? (Thinking I was going to put a shortcut to the proper site) Her: I want it to open the internet. Me: Right. But what site do you want it to open? Her: The internet. Me: I understand, but the internet is a bunch of separate websites. Which one do you want it to open? Her: It needs to open the internet like it always did. Me: What website was the first screen that appears? Her: I don't know it just opens the internet. Me (getting very angry at this point): Ok. But what site on the internet? Imagine I tell you to go to a room in a hotel. You would ask what room. But all I tell you is my room. You don't know which room number I'm in much like I don't know what your default website was. Do you remember any part of what was in the address bar? Her: The address bar is always empty. Me (happy this is almost over): So you just start with a blank page? That's easy enough. Her: No. It always opens the internet. Me (fuming, looking at the clock and ready to leave): You just said the address bar is empty. Her: It is. Fine. Just forget it if you don't want to fix it. I know you know how. Just do it. Me (walks away) Afterwards I found out "the internet" is the website for her company's e-mail and listing stuff. The "address bar" is the google toolbar. When she wants to go to a website, she types the website into the search bar and then clicks the first link in Google. I try not to answer the phone when she calls. Unfortunately, my wife is on her side. But that's a whole other argument involving needing to spend a lot of money on a Mac just to get on the internet. And they wonder why I like video games that involve blowing people up.
Brad Deja Moo - When you feel like you've heard the same bull before.
-
I expect many of the posters here act as free IT support for their family members. I do, and have a BIG family! I have had many strange callouts, but the one I had last night takes the biscuit. My father-in-law asked me to drop in to help him setting up his new laptop. He is a gadget freak, so is always buying new kit - I wish I could afford all of the stuff he gets then barely uses! The new laptop (decent spec Toshiba) needed connecting to his wifi printer, user settings transferring from his old laptop, software installing (and Norton removing!) etc etc, but the thing he was most worried about was the quality of the video from the built-in webcam. This was supposedly high spec (3Mp), but when he opened the software, the video feed was very blurry, unfocussed and washed out. He was very displeased with this and asked if he should complain to the manufacturer or take it back to the retailer. After examining the system for a few moments, checking settings etc, I had a brainwave. I peeled the protective plastic film off the bezel and then showed him the very clear video feed in all its glory! Needless to say, he was very sheepish! Can anyone top this?
==================================== Transvestites - Roberts in Disguise! ====================================
I had a pretty good one years ago that I still remember vividly. This one was not for family but for a good attorney friend. She called me way after hours to tell me that she desperately needed a legal document for a morning court case but the document was on her assitant's computer. The assistant had just left on vacation and could not be reached and would not be back for days. She went to her assistant's computer but could get nothing to show on the screen. It was completely black. Me: Is the computer running? Friend: Yes, the lights are on and everything. Me: Is the monitor powered on? Friend: Yes the indicator light on the monitor is on. Me: Is the monitor cable plugged into the computer. Friend: Yes. After trying about a dozen other things it still showed only a black screen. She asked if I could please come into the office and do what I could since this was so important. She would pay me for my travel (45min each way) and time. Reluctantly I drove there in the dark and got to work. I sat down and played with the monitor buttons a little and suddenly the picture appeared! To make a long story short, it turns out the assistant had left while working on a sensitive document and didn't want to leave it exposed in plain view. So of course she did the most logical secure thing... she turned the monitor brightness all the way down till is was black. :confused: Gotta love it!!
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I had a pretty good one years ago that I still remember vividly. This one was not for family but for a good attorney friend. She called me way after hours to tell me that she desperately needed a legal document for a morning court case but the document was on her assitant's computer. The assistant had just left on vacation and could not be reached and would not be back for days. She went to her assistant's computer but could get nothing to show on the screen. It was completely black. Me: Is the computer running? Friend: Yes, the lights are on and everything. Me: Is the monitor powered on? Friend: Yes the indicator light on the monitor is on. Me: Is the monitor cable plugged into the computer. Friend: Yes. After trying about a dozen other things it still showed only a black screen. She asked if I could please come into the office and do what I could since this was so important. She would pay me for my travel (45min each way) and time. Reluctantly I drove there in the dark and got to work. I sat down and played with the monitor buttons a little and suddenly the picture appeared! To make a long story short, it turns out the assistant had left while working on a sensitive document and didn't want to leave it exposed in plain view. So of course she did the most logical secure thing... she turned the monitor brightness all the way down till is was black. :confused: Gotta love it!!
I had exactly the same problem on a work project - I used to work for a UK government department, and part of our remit was processing salary payments for many departments. There was a legacy (C/CPM!) system that captured overtime payments for prison officers, and I was the only person in the whole organisation that had any knowledge of it. It was sited in our data centre, about five miles from where I was working, and I got a phone call one day to say that the system had gone haywire and most of the menus had disappeared. As it was the day before the payroll run they were panicking - if the screws didn't get their money they would walk off the job, leading to riots etc! I grabbed my bag, loaded it with all of the OS floppies etc, then jumped in a taxi and headed off to the data centre. After waiting for about 20 minutes for someone to le me into the computer room, I approached the terminal (green screen monitor) to see just a few bits of highlighted text visible. I turned up the brightness and walked out! It turns out that they had had a visit from the "computer sanitisation crew" - an outside company who came in from time to time to clean everyone's screens, keyboards and phones. While cleaning the screen they had accidentally turned the brightness down to about 10% of normal, so only the highlighted bits of text were visible.
==================================== Transvestites - Roberts in Disguise! ====================================
