Am I a bad person?
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
Why do you carry around a case of briefs? ;P
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
30 seconds??? No way I would have waited that long to say something: rude sod.
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me
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Why do you carry around a case of briefs? ;P
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
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Move right, he shouts. :)
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
No, you would have been a bad person if you laughed out loud as his body bounced off the walls of the elevator shaft, after you shoved him down it. A quiet grin is sufficient.
Software Zen:
delete this; -
Move right, he shouts. :)
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
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I let you off easy this time. Any more under-garment related puns and I'm going have to get mean.
Whew! For a minute there, I was coming up a little short of breath. ;)
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
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Whew! For a minute there, I was coming up a little short of breath. ;)
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
You are my idol today... :thumbsup: Waaay to subtle... you should have done the same shouting at the same time: DIEEEEEEEEEEEE STUPID FOOOOT DIEEEEEEEE! erm... :rolleyes: DIEEEEEEEEEEEE!
[www.tamelectromecanica.com] Robots, CNC and PLC machines for grinding and polishing.
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
Gregory.Gadow wrote:
Too subtle?
Yes. I personally would have said something to the effect of "are you going up or down?". Then if he didn't respond then I would have raised my voice and told him to back up and let all of us on the elevator proceed with our morning. I have found that when you speak your mind in these types of situations, it almost always works in your favor. Most people, are too chicken shit and surprised that you said anything to them to really put up a fight or get nasty. Best case scenario is that he gets testy then you do as Henry Minute said earlier and give him one..or two, to the nuts - make sure you drive up with your swing of the brief case and then twist after impact. He will then proceed to vomit all over the place as his testicles deflate like a balloon. Works every damn time. I learned a lot in the Army...taking shit from no one is my specialty. Cheers.
-- ** You don't hire a handyman to build a house, you hire a carpenter. ** Jack of all trades and master of none.
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
Probably a lot more subtle than my solution would have been.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997 -
Gregory.Gadow wrote:
Am I a bad person?
Yes! You should have accidentally swung the sharp corner into his nuts.
Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus! When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is.
Henry Minute wrote:
You should have accidentally swung the sharp corner into his nuts.
I live in Seattle: we have cultured passive aggression to a fine art. If this had been New York, however, your solution would definitely have been my first choice. ;P
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You tho got out of that with a thong and a prayer! :-D Pardon my lisp! ;)
The environment that nurtures creative programmers kills management and marketing types - and vice versa. - Orson Scott Card
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Probably a lot more subtle than my solution would have been.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997The solution involving a small metallic projectile travelling at high speed?
"Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.
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I was running late to work this morning. I boarded the elevator at the garage level with three other people and started up. After a few floors, the elevator stopped to let someone else on. But rather than enter the elevator, he stuck out a foot and a hand to hold the elevator door open while he finished his conversation. About 30 seconds later, the elevator began to buzz annoyingly -- the door wouldn't be open this long unless something was broken, right? Still, he held the elevator door open while he chatted with someone in the hall. So I turned around and "accidentally" dropped my briefcase on his foot. The offender yelped and jumped back into the hall. As the door closed, I bent down to retrieve my case and flashed him a small "Sorry about that" smile. Too subtle?
Yes, while Henry's recommendation would have been a little much a "S**t or get off the pot" would have sufficed. [Edit] With a Hey A&&hole to get his attention of course. [/Edit]
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
Henry Minute wrote:
You should have accidentally swung the sharp corner into his nuts.
I live in Seattle: we have cultured passive aggression to a fine art. If this had been New York, however, your solution would definitely have been my first choice. ;P
Gregory.Gadow wrote:
cultured passive aggression
It would still be effective, and they would not know how to respond before you made your get away. Just the idea makes me laugh. :laugh: Thanks Henry!
It was broke, so I fixed it.
