Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • World
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Code Project
CODE PROJECT For Those Who Code
  • Home
  • Articles
  • FAQ
Community
  1. Home
  2. Other Discussions
  3. The Back Room
  4. Let's start the New Year by Offending Everyone!

Let's start the New Year by Offending Everyone!

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Back Room
questionlearning
25 Posts 10 Posters 0 Views 1 Watching
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • P peterchen

    Roger Wright wrote: are you an odd color? Do you worship something strange? Do your eyes slant in a new and different direction? Do you have skin the color of Barney's, without holding your breath? Well, I'm german, to begin with... :cool:


    As James Bond in "die another day", Pierce Brosnan features traits handy in the dawning millenium. He fights without hesitation in a bewildering environment, trusts his high-tech-gadgets, and rather falls for beauty than pondering the political absurdities around him.  [sighist]

    R Offline
    R Offline
    Rutger Ellen
    wrote on last edited by
    #10

    Ok here's one from a duchman Driving along the rhine(= a river) in the netherlands I see someone drinking from the rine using his left hand. As I see that I drive up to him and say: "Hey don't drink from that water is's poisonus!!" he says: "Was sagen Sie" I say: "Mit zwei handen"

    C 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • R Rutger Ellen

      Ok here's one from a duchman Driving along the rhine(= a river) in the netherlands I see someone drinking from the rine using his left hand. As I see that I drive up to him and say: "Hey don't drink from that water is's poisonus!!" he says: "Was sagen Sie" I say: "Mit zwei handen"

      C Offline
      C Offline
      ColinDavies
      wrote on last edited by
      #11

      Das ist gut, aber findet eine Flasche, damit er das waser heim für seine Familie nehmen kan. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies

      Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

      You are the intrepid one, always willing to leap into the fray! A serious character flaw, I might add, but entertaining. Said by Roger Wright about me.

      B K 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • R Roger Wright

        Our old friend Lori, Loli10, sent me this today. In the spirit of Diversity, and the intolerance of it, I present the following: Something to Offend Damned Near Everybody 1. What's the Cuban national anthem? ................"Row, Row, Row Your Boat" 2. Where does an Irish family go on vacation? ................ A different bar. 3. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? ................ They named him "Sum Ting Wong." 4. What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast? ................ They're hiring. 5. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek? ............... Because they're not going to work in the future either. 6. Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays? ................. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it. 7. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? ................ A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe. 8. How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? ................ Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*! 9. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? ................ A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..." 10. My, my, how times have changed. Years ago, when 100 white men chased 1 black man, we called it the Ku Klux Klan. .................. Today they call it the PGA TOUR. 11. Why is there no Disneyland in China? ................ No one's tall enough to go on the good rides Did we miss anyone? Actually, I'm offended - there's no WASP in the list! I propose a challenge, then... We represent the most ethnically diverse group I know of, and I'm sure we've heard every ethnic joke on the planet among us. There are 130+ nationalities in the world, at least 6 major faiths, several shades and hues of skin color, and more political and regional divisions than you can shake a stick at. All and each has a stereotype associated with it, and somewhere among our group someone has heard a joke based on these distinctions. Let's pool our knowledge and finally complete this silly old email joke before next year in time to start it around the world again, missing no one! "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?" - Megan Forbes, on Management (12/5/2002)

        L Offline
        L Offline
        Lost User
        wrote on last edited by
        #12

        I notice your wife didn't let you make a joke about women :laugh: :laugh: The tigress is here :-D

        R 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • C ColinDavies

          Ok I can't resist. (Qu) Why was Hitler a terrible golfer ? (Answer below.) (Ans) He could never get out of a bunker. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies

          Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

          You are the intrepid one, always willing to leap into the fray! A serious character flaw, I might add, but entertaining. Said by Roger Wright about me.

          B Offline
          B Offline
          brianwelsch
          wrote on last edited by
          #13

          Or this old stand-by.... (Q) How do German's tie their shoes? (A) In little Nazis.... (bum-da-bum bump) Thank You, Thank You....... :rolleyes: BW "If you enjoy what you do, you'll never work another day in your life." - Confucius

          D 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • C ColinDavies

            Das ist gut, aber findet eine Flasche, damit er das waser heim für seine Familie nehmen kan. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies

            Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

            You are the intrepid one, always willing to leap into the fray! A serious character flaw, I might add, but entertaining. Said by Roger Wright about me.

            B Offline
            B Offline
            brianwelsch
            wrote on last edited by
            #14

            Was bist du aber gemein.. ;) BW "If you enjoy what you do, you'll never work another day in your life." - Confucius

            C 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • B brianwelsch

              Or this old stand-by.... (Q) How do German's tie their shoes? (A) In little Nazis.... (bum-da-bum bump) Thank You, Thank You....... :rolleyes: BW "If you enjoy what you do, you'll never work another day in your life." - Confucius

              D Offline
              D Offline
              David Wulff
              wrote on last edited by
              #15

              I don't get it? :-O


              David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

              Skippy, the rain won't come! [+]

              B 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • L Lost User

                I notice your wife didn't let you make a joke about women :laugh: :laugh: The tigress is here :-D

                R Offline
                R Offline
                Roger Wright
                wrote on last edited by
                #16

                Trollslayer wrote: I notice your wife didn't let you make a joke about women I don't have one, but even I have enough sense not to tread that path!:-D "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?" - Megan Forbes, on Management (12/5/2002)

                J 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • D David Wulff

                  I don't get it? :-O


                  David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                  Skippy, the rain won't come! [+]

                  B Offline
                  B Offline
                  brianwelsch
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #17

                  Tie their shoes in knots. knotsies ---> Nazis. Alright, maybe its knot that funny...:~ BW "Gandalf. Yes. That is what they used to call me. Gandalf the Grey. *I* am Gandalf the White." - Gandalf the White

                  J 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • C ColinDavies

                    peterchen wrote: But so far you happened to only insult an Austrian. I feel insulted that you mix me up with an Austrian. OK, (Qu) Why does Geramny have the highest incidence of Caesarean births in the world ? (Ans) It's really hard to push such big square heads out of round holes. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies

                    Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

                    You are the intrepid one, always willing to leap into the fray! A serious character flaw, I might add, but entertaining. Said by Roger Wright about me.

                    R Offline
                    R Offline
                    Roger Wright
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #18

                    That's what pliers are for! "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?" - Megan Forbes, on Management (12/5/2002)

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • B brianwelsch

                      Was bist du aber gemein.. ;) BW "If you enjoy what you do, you'll never work another day in your life." - Confucius

                      C Offline
                      C Offline
                      Chris Losinger
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #19

                      Gunter glieben glauchen globen (*) -c


                      I'm not the droid you're looking for.

                      ThumbNailer

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • R Roger Wright

                        Our old friend Lori, Loli10, sent me this today. In the spirit of Diversity, and the intolerance of it, I present the following: Something to Offend Damned Near Everybody 1. What's the Cuban national anthem? ................"Row, Row, Row Your Boat" 2. Where does an Irish family go on vacation? ................ A different bar. 3. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? ................ They named him "Sum Ting Wong." 4. What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast? ................ They're hiring. 5. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek? ............... Because they're not going to work in the future either. 6. Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays? ................. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it. 7. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? ................ A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe. 8. How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? ................ Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*! 9. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? ................ A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..." 10. My, my, how times have changed. Years ago, when 100 white men chased 1 black man, we called it the Ku Klux Klan. .................. Today they call it the PGA TOUR. 11. Why is there no Disneyland in China? ................ No one's tall enough to go on the good rides Did we miss anyone? Actually, I'm offended - there's no WASP in the list! I propose a challenge, then... We represent the most ethnically diverse group I know of, and I'm sure we've heard every ethnic joke on the planet among us. There are 130+ nationalities in the world, at least 6 major faiths, several shades and hues of skin color, and more political and regional divisions than you can shake a stick at. All and each has a stereotype associated with it, and somewhere among our group someone has heard a joke based on these distinctions. Let's pool our knowledge and finally complete this silly old email joke before next year in time to start it around the world again, missing no one! "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?" - Megan Forbes, on Management (12/5/2002)

                        J Offline
                        J Offline
                        Jorgen Sigvardsson
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #20

                        Well worth a 5! :-D -- Only in a world this shitty could you even try to say these were innocent people and keep a straight face.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • P peterchen

                          Owww, bad one, Colin :-D But so far you happened to only insult an Austrian. I feel insulted that you mix me up with an Austrian. Oh.


                          As James Bond in "die another day", Pierce Brosnan features traits handy in the dawning millenium. He fights without hesitation in a bewildering environment, trusts his high-tech-gadgets, and rather falls for beauty than pondering the political absurdities around him.  [sighist]

                          J Offline
                          J Offline
                          Jorgen Sigvardsson
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #21

                          Well, he claimed that Austria belonged to the greater Germany. So in his own words, he was German. But then again, his words were mostly.. hmm.. screwed up? :) -- Only in a world this shitty could you even try to say these were innocent people and keep a straight face.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • B brianwelsch

                            Tie their shoes in knots. knotsies ---> Nazis. Alright, maybe its knot that funny...:~ BW "Gandalf. Yes. That is what they used to call me. Gandalf the Grey. *I* am Gandalf the White." - Gandalf the White

                            J Offline
                            J Offline
                            Jorgen Sigvardsson
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #22

                            Uhmm.. you have to stretch pretty far to get that one. :) -- Only in a world this shitty could you even try to say these were innocent people and keep a straight face.

                            B 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • R Roger Wright

                              Trollslayer wrote: I notice your wife didn't let you make a joke about women I don't have one, but even I have enough sense not to tread that path!:-D "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?" - Megan Forbes, on Management (12/5/2002)

                              J Offline
                              J Offline
                              Jorgen Sigvardsson
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #23

                              Roger Wright wrote: I don't have one, but even I have enough sense not to tread that path! *making chicken sounds* :rolleyes: -- Only in a world this shitty could you even try to say these were innocent people and keep a straight face.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • J Jorgen Sigvardsson

                                Uhmm.. you have to stretch pretty far to get that one. :) -- Only in a world this shitty could you even try to say these were innocent people and keep a straight face.

                                B Offline
                                B Offline
                                brianwelsch
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #24

                                Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: you have to stretch pretty far to get that one. Yeah, I guess so... I remember kids telling me that one when I was much younger. Out of any stupid Germen jokes I heard growing up that one stuck with me. Go figure... :~ BW "Gandalf. Yes. That is what they used to call me. Gandalf the Grey. *I* am Gandalf the White." - Gandalf the White

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • C ColinDavies

                                  Das ist gut, aber findet eine Flasche, damit er das waser heim für seine Familie nehmen kan. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies

                                  Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

                                  You are the intrepid one, always willing to leap into the fray! A serious character flaw, I might add, but entertaining. Said by Roger Wright about me.

                                  K Offline
                                  K Offline
                                  KaRl
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #25

                                  Unglaublich! I wusste nicht, dass NZ eine alte Kolonie des Deutschen Reichs war :)


                                  I don't feel it anymore I don't see, anymore I don't hear, anymore I don't speak anymore, I don't feel

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  Reply
                                  • Reply as topic
                                  Log in to reply
                                  • Oldest to Newest
                                  • Newest to Oldest
                                  • Most Votes


                                  • Login

                                  • Don't have an account? Register

                                  • Login or register to search.
                                  • First post
                                    Last post
                                  0
                                  • Categories
                                  • Recent
                                  • Tags
                                  • Popular
                                  • World
                                  • Users
                                  • Groups