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Vampires

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  • H Offline
    H Offline
    hoernchenmeister
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Ok, this is a joke (yeah, really). I hope the translation doesn't kill the fun ;) Three vampires (v1, v2, v3) are meeting in the night on a little hill. They want to make sure (once and for all) which one of them is the greatest vampire off all times. v1: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 10 minutes later he is back, covered in blood. v2/v3: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v1: Yeah, can you guys see the little village over there? (in the night they can see some lights from a little village 2 miles away). v2/v3: Yes, we can see it. v1: I sucked the village completely dry, not a single drop of blood left there. The other vampires Uhhhed an Ohhhed and agreed that he is a real great vampire. A little bit later: v2: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 20 minutes later he is back, completely covered in blood... it's dripping from his robe... quite a mess v1/v3: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v2: Yeah, can you guys see the little town over there? (in the night they can see some lights from a little town about 4 miles away). v1/v3: Yes, we can see it. v2: I sucked the town completely dry, not a single drop of blood left there. The other vampires Uhhhed an Ohhhed and agreed that he is a really, really great vampire. A little bit later: v3: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 5 minutes later he is back, completely soaked in blood... it's dripping from his robe, his mouth, his head... blood everywhere v1/v2: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v3: Hah... look over there. Can you guys see the tree? v1/v2: Yes, we can see it... v3: I couldn't...

    L N 2 Replies Last reply
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    • H hoernchenmeister

      Ok, this is a joke (yeah, really). I hope the translation doesn't kill the fun ;) Three vampires (v1, v2, v3) are meeting in the night on a little hill. They want to make sure (once and for all) which one of them is the greatest vampire off all times. v1: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 10 minutes later he is back, covered in blood. v2/v3: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v1: Yeah, can you guys see the little village over there? (in the night they can see some lights from a little village 2 miles away). v2/v3: Yes, we can see it. v1: I sucked the village completely dry, not a single drop of blood left there. The other vampires Uhhhed an Ohhhed and agreed that he is a real great vampire. A little bit later: v2: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 20 minutes later he is back, completely covered in blood... it's dripping from his robe... quite a mess v1/v3: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v2: Yeah, can you guys see the little town over there? (in the night they can see some lights from a little town about 4 miles away). v1/v3: Yes, we can see it. v2: I sucked the town completely dry, not a single drop of blood left there. The other vampires Uhhhed an Ohhhed and agreed that he is a really, really great vampire. A little bit later: v3: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 5 minutes later he is back, completely soaked in blood... it's dripping from his robe, his mouth, his head... blood everywhere v1/v2: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v3: Hah... look over there. Can you guys see the tree? v1/v2: Yes, we can see it... v3: I couldn't...

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      It's a very old joke, normally told about vampire bats, but I like the almost childlike attempt at swearing you have got into it.

      Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

      H 1 Reply Last reply
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      • L Lost User

        It's a very old joke, normally told about vampire bats, but I like the almost childlike attempt at swearing you have got into it.

        Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

        H Offline
        H Offline
        hoernchenmeister
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Swearing in foreign languages is hard ;)

        P 1 Reply Last reply
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        • H hoernchenmeister

          Swearing in foreign languages is hard ;)

          P Offline
          P Offline
          Pete OHanlon
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Just search for any post by Michael Martin. You should find plenty of practical samples there.

          Forgive your enemies - it messes with their heads

          "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

          My blog | My articles | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier - my favourite utility

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          • H hoernchenmeister

            Ok, this is a joke (yeah, really). I hope the translation doesn't kill the fun ;) Three vampires (v1, v2, v3) are meeting in the night on a little hill. They want to make sure (once and for all) which one of them is the greatest vampire off all times. v1: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 10 minutes later he is back, covered in blood. v2/v3: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v1: Yeah, can you guys see the little village over there? (in the night they can see some lights from a little village 2 miles away). v2/v3: Yes, we can see it. v1: I sucked the village completely dry, not a single drop of blood left there. The other vampires Uhhhed an Ohhhed and agreed that he is a real great vampire. A little bit later: v2: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 20 minutes later he is back, completely covered in blood... it's dripping from his robe... quite a mess v1/v3: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v2: Yeah, can you guys see the little town over there? (in the night they can see some lights from a little town about 4 miles away). v1/v3: Yes, we can see it. v2: I sucked the town completely dry, not a single drop of blood left there. The other vampires Uhhhed an Ohhhed and agreed that he is a really, really great vampire. A little bit later: v3: Hey guys, just wait here for a moment, I'll be right back: Huuuu, he vanishes into the night... 5 minutes later he is back, completely soaked in blood... it's dripping from his robe, his mouth, his head... blood everywhere v1/v2: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened? v3: Hah... look over there. Can you guys see the tree? v1/v2: Yes, we can see it... v3: I couldn't...

            N Offline
            N Offline
            nevin 2011
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            hoernchenmeister wrote:

            5 minutes later he is back, completely soaked in blood... it's dripping from his robe, his mouth, his head... blood everywhere
             
            v1/v2: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened?
            v3: Hah... look over there. Can you guys see the tree?
            v1/v2: Yes, we can see it...
             
            v3: I couldn't...

            I couldn't... What?? Didn't understand. Plz explain!

            H 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • N nevin 2011

              hoernchenmeister wrote:

              5 minutes later he is back, completely soaked in blood... it's dripping from his robe, his mouth, his head... blood everywhere
               
              v1/v2: Hey dude, what the sweet hell happened?
              v3: Hah... look over there. Can you guys see the tree?
              v1/v2: Yes, we can see it...
               
              v3: I couldn't...

              I couldn't... What?? Didn't understand. Plz explain!

              H Offline
              H Offline
              hoernchenmeister
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              I couldn't (see the tree.... when vanishing into the night... that's why he is soaked in (his own) blood). Actually he hit the tree when flying away. I screwed this one up, didn't I?

              L N 2 Replies Last reply
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              • H hoernchenmeister

                I couldn't (see the tree.... when vanishing into the night... that's why he is soaked in (his own) blood). Actually he hit the tree when flying away. I screwed this one up, didn't I?

                L Offline
                L Offline
                Le centriste
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Vampires have blood? That means Edward can have a boner, after all.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • H hoernchenmeister

                  I couldn't (see the tree.... when vanishing into the night... that's why he is soaked in (his own) blood). Actually he hit the tree when flying away. I screwed this one up, didn't I?

                  N Offline
                  N Offline
                  nevin 2011
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Thanks for that. Great one! My mistake!! Damn me .. can't understand a simple joke! :(

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