More gender bashing

Paul Watson

PREGNANCY QUESTIONS & ANSWERS Q: Should I have a baby after 35? A: No, 35 children is enough. Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? A: With any luck, right after he finishes college. Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex? A: Childbirth. Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational. A: So what's your question? Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right? A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current. Q: When is the best time to get an epidural? A: Right after you find out you're pregnant. Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor? A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you. Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth? A: Yes, pregnancy. Q: Do I have to have a baby shower? A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly. Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again? A: When the kids are in college. "ESTROGEN ISSUES" 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES" 1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet. 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says "How's my driving-call 1-800-***" 6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice. 7. You're convinced there's way too many males in this world. 8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus. 9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday. TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND 10. Cats' facial expressions. 9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors. 8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds. 7. Fat clothes. 6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time. 5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell. 4. Cutting your bangs to make them grow. 3. Eyelash curlers. 2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made

Paul

Megan Forbes

Paul Watson wrote: TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND Why is chocolate not here?!? :mad:

I knew it would end badly when I first met Chris in a Canberra alleyway and he said 'try some-it won't hurt you'... -Christian Graus on Code Project outages His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a tumble dryer. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to he wall**-Shaun Wilde**

Michael P Butler

Megan Forbes wrote: Why is chocolate not here?!? Because I understand chocolate too (or the need/desire for it). And the last time I checked I wasn't a women. [sound of zipper] hmm, yup still all intact Michael You gotta roll with it You gotta take your time You gotta say what you say Don't let anybody get in your way - Oasis

Anna Jayne Metcalfe

lol! :laugh: Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Add-In for Visual C++

Megan Forbes

How odd - I seem to remember Paul claiming once that he also understands chocolate they way we do, but I have my doubts! Chocolate almost attains Bob status with us :)

I knew it would end badly when I first met Chris in a Canberra alleyway and he said 'try some-it won't hurt you'... -Christian Graus on Code Project outages His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a tumble dryer. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to he wall**-Shaun Wilde**

Lost User

10 items would have been nice in the top 10 lists, or is it that time of month Paul ?:laugh: Elaine (cat expression #6) The tigress is here :-D

Lost User

Paul Watson wrote: 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet. Its a thought...... :rolleyes: The tigress is here :-D

Paul Watson

Trollslayer wrote: 10 items would have been nice in the top 10 lists, or is it that time of month Paul There are three types of people in the world Elaine. Those who can count, and those who cannot. ;) *Actually there was a number 1 but it was so boring and everyone has heard it so many times I cut it off.

Paul Watson
Bluegrass
Cape Town, South Africa

My humble photographic tribute to our world[^]

Paul Watson

Megan Forbes wrote: How odd - I seem to remember Paul claiming once that he also understands chocolate they way we do, but I have my doubts! I doubt men and women understand any single one thing the same way, but we certainly have the same chemicals in regards to chocolate. I have often wondered what it must be like to take my conciousness and place it in another persons brain. I wonder how things will look, taste, feel and smell different. Wether we will react differently too.

Paul Watson
Bluegrass
Cape Town, South Africa

My humble photographic tribute to our world[^]

Megan Forbes

Paul Watson wrote: I have often wondered what it must be like to take my conciousness and place it in another persons brain. I wonder how things will look, taste, feel and smell different. Wether we will react differently too. Yeah, it would be interesting. The fact that colours like green and blue relax most people doesn't necessarily mean they look the same to all of us. But how will we ever know???

I knew it would end badly when I first met Chris in a Canberra alleyway and he said 'try some-it won't hurt you'... -Christian Graus on Code Project outages His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a tumble dryer. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to he wall**-Shaun Wilde**

Michael A Barnhart

Megan Forbes wrote: Chocolate almost attains Bob status with us You have not met my brother. He keeps bakers chocolate handy so he knows he has some if needed and the "regular" has been taken :mad: (or used up:-O). I am not as addicted but do have a cookbook of only chocolate chip cookie recipes. ;P "I will find a new sig someday."

KaRl

Agreed! I'm a chocolate fan since my youngest age.

Angels banished from heaven have no choice but to become demons Cowboy Bebop

benjymous

I seem to remember being offered honorary womanhood after my comments on chocolate at some point :) Oh yeah - hi Meg :) Got any of your holiday pics online yet? I signed up to photoSIG[^] and got my first photo uploaded (restricted to 1 pic every 3 days for newbies) - I'm chuffed that it's getting a possitive response :) Through the Clock[^] -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

KaRl

As soon as we will have better interfaces for the brain than the ones given by Mother Nature, it will IMO be possible (but desirable :confused:?)

Angels banished from heaven have no choice but to become demons Cowboy Bebop

KaRl

benjymous wrote: Through the Clock[^] "Nice weather, isn't it?"

Angels banished from heaven have no choice but to become demons Cowboy Bebop

benjymous

Mmm - I love really rich, really dark chocolate (the stuff you need to resort to extreme violence over in order to break off a chunk) -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

benjymous

KaЯl wrote: "Nice weather, isn't it?" huh? -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

benjymous

Paul Watson wrote: ..take my conciousness and place it in another persons brain.. I'm pretty sure *everything* would feel wrong. For example how can you be sure that what you see as being the colour red would actually look red when seen through your new nervous system (of course the object would still be red, but to your brain, calibrated to your own body, it may look blue or green) - I know for certain that my own eyes have a slightly different colour balance, so I see no reason why somebody else's eyes would have a balance even remotely like mine. -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

KaRl

The picture is really nice, however the sky is so grey in the background that I remembered this old image of two typical britishmen, talking under rain "-Nice weather, isn't it? - indeed" Just a mental image :) (in any sense :rolleyes: )

Angels banished from heaven have no choice but to become demons Cowboy Bebop

benjymous

Ahh, well, that's November Paris weather for you ;P KaЯl wrote: (in any sense :rolleyes:) Danger, emoticon parse overflow! -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!