I have done a stupid!!!!!
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
The stupid thing was not to send it to the customer, but to write stupid code (or stupid messages) Doing this, you just promise yourself that you'll have to come back and clean it :-(
gzo
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The stupid thing was not to send it to the customer, but to write stupid code (or stupid messages) Doing this, you just promise yourself that you'll have to come back and clean it :-(
gzo
I completely agree, however silly messages are very useful when tracking down issues. Note things like that from now will commented out with /* & */ and not // as it is too easy to remove the intended comments
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
I once programmed a function and added some assertions. For one of those assertions I figured it was impossible to break, or if it were, it must be someone meddling with that code. I considered removing the assertion entirely, but instead added a message box saying: "You shouldn't be seeing this error message. If you do, please speak to <my name>" When we sent a prototype to the client for testing a few weeks later, I promptly got a call, asking about that exact error message! Seems one of my colleagues was messing with my code after all. Only we didn't catch it in testing ourselves... On the plus side, that prototype was meant for testing and weeding out ... if not these kind of stupid messages, at least the cause for it (which was a real bug). Also the tester found it rather entertaining. :)
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I once shipped a debug build into production by mistake. Whenever an exception was thrown it would pop-up a message box containing the error; normally they were just written to the log. It was a component that runs on a server. An unattended server...
Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett
Nagy Vilmos wrote:
An unattended server...
At least it was unattended... Last year I shipped a faceless utility that links a client's in-house till systems to the database of their online booking system. The till software was a train wreck written in PASCAL (still is in fact!), but thankfully I only had to poll for CSV files in a specified location, bump the data into the cloud, archive the original then delete it. I'm a Mac based web dev and was struggling with the client side stuff on Windoze. I thought I'd covered all the bases, and one clause that should never occur (according to the till software "guide" and my extensive "research") got the exasperated developer treatment. Needless to say, it happened, resulting in a modal dialogue popping up on the hotel chain's main computer in the accounts office: "This S**T should never happen! Damn you GOOGLE!" - That was one interesting phone call... :omg: Danny
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I once programmed a function and added some assertions. For one of those assertions I figured it was impossible to break, or if it were, it must be someone meddling with that code. I considered removing the assertion entirely, but instead added a message box saying: "You shouldn't be seeing this error message. If you do, please speak to <my name>" When we sent a prototype to the client for testing a few weeks later, I promptly got a call, asking about that exact error message! Seems one of my colleagues was messing with my code after all. Only we didn't catch it in testing ourselves... On the plus side, that prototype was meant for testing and weeding out ... if not these kind of stupid messages, at least the cause for it (which was a real bug). Also the tester found it rather entertaining. :)
Stefan_Lang wrote:
On the plus side, that prototype was meant for testing and weeding out ... if not these kind of stupid messages, at least the cause for it (which was a real bug).
Same here, the software I was writing was to test the update to an existing board that had undergone a re-spin, code update & swapping to USB from D-type. I think at least some humour is required in this job or you go insane!
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
Some "too soon" releases are about code, and some are about test data.
Back in the late Seventies, when I worked, briefly, for a company that sold business management software (never again, please, Lord!), I was made responsible for an inventory control subsystem based upon a primitive proprietary database. As you can imagine, you can't test something like that without creating a substantial number of test records, which I did, tapping my, ah, fertile imagination for item types, names, and descriptions.
The testing went on for quite a long time, owing to the complex interaction of inventory and order processing. At the conclusion thereof, the customer, a Manhattan fashion designer, was jumping up and down in his insistence that the system be delivered at once. We were so desperate to get the **BLEEP!**ing thing out of our shop and into his hands that we forgot to purge the test records from the database.
The customer never bothered to check whether there was anything in the database. He simply had his data-entry people populate it with his long list of items for sale. My test records remained in the mix, undetected until the system was used to generate a printed catalog -- just lines of text on paper; this was the Seventies, after all -- to be sent to the company's redistributors.
You can imagine the consternation that ensued when one of the redistributors tried to order 1000 sets of the "sleepwear spurs," women's size 8, in burnished pewter. And that was one of the milder items I'd concocted.
(I am so much happier doing embedded real-time stuff!)
(This message is programming you in ways you cannot detect. Be afraid.)
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Some "too soon" releases are about code, and some are about test data.
Back in the late Seventies, when I worked, briefly, for a company that sold business management software (never again, please, Lord!), I was made responsible for an inventory control subsystem based upon a primitive proprietary database. As you can imagine, you can't test something like that without creating a substantial number of test records, which I did, tapping my, ah, fertile imagination for item types, names, and descriptions.
The testing went on for quite a long time, owing to the complex interaction of inventory and order processing. At the conclusion thereof, the customer, a Manhattan fashion designer, was jumping up and down in his insistence that the system be delivered at once. We were so desperate to get the **BLEEP!**ing thing out of our shop and into his hands that we forgot to purge the test records from the database.
The customer never bothered to check whether there was anything in the database. He simply had his data-entry people populate it with his long list of items for sale. My test records remained in the mix, undetected until the system was used to generate a printed catalog -- just lines of text on paper; this was the Seventies, after all -- to be sent to the company's redistributors.
You can imagine the consternation that ensued when one of the redistributors tried to order 1000 sets of the "sleepwear spurs," women's size 8, in burnished pewter. And that was one of the milder items I'd concocted.
(I am so much happier doing embedded real-time stuff!)
(This message is programming you in ways you cannot detect. Be afraid.)
I know what you mean, when it goes off on a tangent it so much easier to see and can usually be solved with a soldering iron, I only started doing Windows stuff as at a previous company I walked in on the 'Whos gonna do it' conversation to be met with 'ohh, Glenn can'. Lesson learnt look busy at all times!
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
I have really enjoyed this lounge topic...
You have triggered a lot of great responses and memories.
I am sure that there are heaps more out there.I never put profanities in letters or code without using an X or XXX.
I scan for these prior to finalising and saving over them.
In fact I stopped using the profanities at all due to the risk and now replace these with the X or XXX.
I will often give weird or profound names to functions and modules. This humours me.The X or XXX means revisit this.
However in one of my offers the client returned with "Wow we accept your offer and we can not believe that you will do all this work for $X. $10 seems very cheap for this amount of work." I retracted my offer on the grounds that I do not quote in roman dollars and resubmitted with the $X replaced with real data.
I always hide some cryptic stuff in all of my applications, and whilst these may be stupid, they are in fact deliberate and planned. I love these hidden bits of stupid harmless bits of code that usually are a dedication to someone special or just a silly response to user input.
The most stupid thing that I released was embarrassing and stupid. Years ago I decided to learn Pascal. That wasn't a stupid thing, except that I never did any Pascal dev as I ventured into C++ after this distraction. It was Turbo Pascal and I just liked the turbo bit. I was interested in the single bit speaker sound output and wrote a beginners "Virus Found" with dumb text app with mad sound effects. We had a DOS security application that used to use function keys to shell to other apps. We used this for promotions and for testing. During one of our promotions we used the system to award door prizes to participants. They would read their data keys and the system would respond with a random response re the prize.
Our senior Techo did some upgrades to the latest version and used the test / promo box to generate these installs. The result was that a major law enforcement agency called me saying that they had a virus on their security system and angrily said please explain, and I could hear the sound effects in the background of the telephone call. Next an international oriented goverment agency called to say that they had a virus as every time they left their front door open the system raised a popup alarm saying "Congratulations you have won a bottle of wine".
All that was about 20 years ago.
All the embarrassing things since then have been planned and deliberate.
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I have really enjoyed this lounge topic...
You have triggered a lot of great responses and memories.
I am sure that there are heaps more out there.I never put profanities in letters or code without using an X or XXX.
I scan for these prior to finalising and saving over them.
In fact I stopped using the profanities at all due to the risk and now replace these with the X or XXX.
I will often give weird or profound names to functions and modules. This humours me.The X or XXX means revisit this.
However in one of my offers the client returned with "Wow we accept your offer and we can not believe that you will do all this work for $X. $10 seems very cheap for this amount of work." I retracted my offer on the grounds that I do not quote in roman dollars and resubmitted with the $X replaced with real data.
I always hide some cryptic stuff in all of my applications, and whilst these may be stupid, they are in fact deliberate and planned. I love these hidden bits of stupid harmless bits of code that usually are a dedication to someone special or just a silly response to user input.
The most stupid thing that I released was embarrassing and stupid. Years ago I decided to learn Pascal. That wasn't a stupid thing, except that I never did any Pascal dev as I ventured into C++ after this distraction. It was Turbo Pascal and I just liked the turbo bit. I was interested in the single bit speaker sound output and wrote a beginners "Virus Found" with dumb text app with mad sound effects. We had a DOS security application that used to use function keys to shell to other apps. We used this for promotions and for testing. During one of our promotions we used the system to award door prizes to participants. They would read their data keys and the system would respond with a random response re the prize.
Our senior Techo did some upgrades to the latest version and used the test / promo box to generate these installs. The result was that a major law enforcement agency called me saying that they had a virus on their security system and angrily said please explain, and I could hear the sound effects in the background of the telephone call. Next an international oriented goverment agency called to say that they had a virus as every time they left their front door open the system raised a popup alarm saying "Congratulations you have won a bottle of wine".
All that was about 20 years ago.
All the embarrassing things since then have been planned and deliberate.
Well the main thing I got from this was I'm not alone. I was expecting a set of snobby I have never done that, the most reassuring thing was there were none (and also my opposite number got to the mail server before it got down loaded, I now owe him a case of Beer,<> he has to get back to me with the brand <>. As for profanities never have in work code private/learning code different matter, Monty Python & standard geeky quotes, X-Files, Lemmings, one instance "The Truth is Out There, but not in here!" springs immediately to mind and "Oh No!, Kabang!" when a buffer broke and resulting data flood crashed the PC. I am more of a Hardware guy than a Softie and thought it was my lack of deployment experience that led to it happening
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Why, oh Why can't there be a means of getting back an email once it you look at it, even the post office give you the option of using a wire coat hanger. (No I was not interfering with Her Majesty's Postal Service, I assure you Officer) :)
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Precisely why I have the "undo" button on my gmail account and a delay on my work Outlook for sending.
Thats a good idea! hadn't though of that ;)
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
quick one when I was very young... had a dataease database, that I was using to mailshot clients with, part of the data export procedure to create the mailshot was it would give them a client code based on the first 3 letters of the first name of the company followed by the first letter of any other word (I was very young and green) took a while before anyone noticed what it was calling "Cunningham Turner Solicitors"...
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quick one when I was very young... had a dataease database, that I was using to mailshot clients with, part of the data export procedure to create the mailshot was it would give them a client code based on the first 3 letters of the first name of the company followed by the first letter of any other word (I was very young and green) took a while before anyone noticed what it was calling "Cunningham Turner Solicitors"...
Like it!
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
I used to work for a firm that made tracking electronics and a colleague of mine was was testing a touch memory reader. For those that don't know, Dallas touch memory devices primarily contain (among other things) a "semi-unique" serial number that you can use for identification purposes which can be read by electrical contact using a two-wire protocol. The thing was like a gun with a trigger and a small LCD display. The idea was you touch the memory device, read its serial number it reports what it was purporting to represent on the LCD. Well, being the wag that he was, the test data loaded into the prototype unit were such edifying gems as "Betty Swollocks" and "Mary Hinge". This was great fun until a customer came around for a demo and was not very impressed by what she saw.... Yep, the moral of the story is just don't do it. :D
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I am regarded the same way, give it Glenn, if he can't break it no one can with ease!
Nothing quite as embarassing as that. I occasionally would put a movie quote in the comments as a joke for the other developers, in case we had to work on each other's code. So, in this one Excel macro, which was summing up values, I wrote: "There is not enough time to explain, let me sum up..." - Inigo Montoya A year or so went by, then I got a phone call from someone who had run the macro, and received an error and had chosen "Debug", which of course displayed the line which the error had occurred and the comment above.
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Thats a good idea! hadn't though of that ;)
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quick one when I was very young... had a dataease database, that I was using to mailshot clients with, part of the data export procedure to create the mailshot was it would give them a client code based on the first 3 letters of the first name of the company followed by the first letter of any other word (I was very young and green) took a while before anyone noticed what it was calling "Cunningham Turner Solicitors"...
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I used to work for a firm that made tracking electronics and a colleague of mine was was testing a touch memory reader. For those that don't know, Dallas touch memory devices primarily contain (among other things) a "semi-unique" serial number that you can use for identification purposes which can be read by electrical contact using a two-wire protocol. The thing was like a gun with a trigger and a small LCD display. The idea was you touch the memory device, read its serial number it reports what it was purporting to represent on the LCD. Well, being the wag that he was, the test data loaded into the prototype unit were such edifying gems as "Betty Swollocks" and "Mary Hinge". This was great fun until a customer came around for a demo and was not very impressed by what she saw.... Yep, the moral of the story is just don't do it. :D
but if you must try not to be too offensive a little clean humour can at times be useful.
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In a rush to email some code last night, I sent the wrong executable one which contained the following bit of test code
if (txtSerialNumberRead != txtSerialNumber_ReadIn)
{
MessageBox.Show("ERROR!! Kill all humans");
MessageBox.Show("Serial Number Entered Does Not Match **** Attached", "**** Tester", MessageBoxButtons.OK, MessageBoxIcon.Error);
}
//elseThe proper build does not offer death to humanity just the lower message, here's hoping the recipients look at there next mail before running it! Anybody else had this happen, shipped something with a dumb comment not hidden? or is it just me! Glenn
That isn't as far off of normal error messages as you think. Consider what non-computer people think when they encounter error messages that make sense to us. For instance, my grandfather a few years ago told me the story of getting his first computer, using it for a while, and then suddenly a screen came up that said, "Illegal instruction. Fatal error." and he nervously glanced out the window to see if any police cars were around, and wondered if his will should be in order. He was joking when he told the story, but he probably didn't have any idea what that message actually meant, whereas it had never even occurred to me that those words would mean something completely different to a non-programmer.
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That isn't as far off of normal error messages as you think. Consider what non-computer people think when they encounter error messages that make sense to us. For instance, my grandfather a few years ago told me the story of getting his first computer, using it for a while, and then suddenly a screen came up that said, "Illegal instruction. Fatal error." and he nervously glanced out the window to see if any police cars were around, and wondered if his will should be in order. He was joking when he told the story, but he probably didn't have any idea what that message actually meant, whereas it had never even occurred to me that those words would mean something completely different to a non-programmer.
I was afraid when I posted this that "proper" Softies would be very unsympathetic and scornful of some Hardware guy scratching at Windows, I have in the past when I was working on some embedded code and needed a way of showing an error made an LED flash SOS in Morse code (really just messing around until some body got back to me). That is now a valued feature of that product as it gives service guys an indication of what has gone wrong.