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Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • A Amir Mahfoozi

    Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!". The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, which the captain put on and lead the crew to battle the pirate boarding party. Although some casualties occurred among the crew, the pirates were repelled. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending boarding parties. The crew cowered in fear, but the captain calm as ever bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!". The battle was on, and once again the Captain and his crew repelled both boarding parties, although this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's occurrences when an ensign looked to the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?". The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, exhorted, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the wound and thus, you men will continue to fight unafraid". The men sat in silence marveling at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to their Captain for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my brown pants!!

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    Espen Harlinn
    wrote on last edited by
    #3

    :thumbsup: Brilliant :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Espen Harlinn Principal Architect, Software - Goodtech Projects & Services AS My LinkedIn Profile

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    • E Espen Harlinn

      :thumbsup: Brilliant :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

      Espen Harlinn Principal Architect, Software - Goodtech Projects & Services AS My LinkedIn Profile

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      Dalek Dave
      wrote on last edited by
      #4

      I first heard it as why did English Officers where Red Coats. And that is why French Officers wear Brown Trousers.

      --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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      • E Espen Harlinn

        :thumbsup: Brilliant :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

        Espen Harlinn Principal Architect, Software - Goodtech Projects & Services AS My LinkedIn Profile

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        Amir Mahfoozi
        wrote on last edited by
        #5

        Thanks Espen ;)

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        • D Dalek Dave

          I first heard it as why did English Officers where Red Coats. And that is why French Officers wear Brown Trousers.

          --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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          Keith Barrow
          wrote on last edited by
          #6

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          And that is why French Officers wear Brown Trousers.

          And white shirts, so they have the correct colour material handy, easily ripped into a rudimentary flag.

          Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
          -Or-
          A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

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          • K Keith Barrow

            Dalek Dave wrote:

            And that is why French Officers wear Brown Trousers.

            And white shirts, so they have the correct colour material handy, easily ripped into a rudimentary flag.

            Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
            -Or-
            A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

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            Dalek Dave
            wrote on last edited by
            #7

            Visa and Mastercard never really succeeded in France, for there is no French word for 'Charge'.

            --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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            • D Dalek Dave

              I first heard it as why did English Officers where Red Coats. And that is why French Officers wear Brown Trousers.

              --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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              hairy_hats
              wrote on last edited by
              #8

              Dalek Dave wrote:

              why did English Officers where Red Coats

              :wtf:

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              • H hairy_hats

                Dalek Dave wrote:

                why did English Officers where Red Coats

                :wtf:

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                Dalek Dave
                wrote on last edited by
                #9

                Je suis coupable BTW, The French Security Forces have raised their terror alert status from "Run" to "Hide". If attacks continue on the continent they may be forced to further increase the alert to "Surrender", or even as high as "Collaborate"

                --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                • D Dalek Dave

                  Je suis coupable BTW, The French Security Forces have raised their terror alert status from "Run" to "Hide". If attacks continue on the continent they may be forced to further increase the alert to "Surrender", or even as high as "Collaborate"

                  --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                  hairy_hats
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #10

                  Your French jokes are tending to the repetitious now.

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                  • H hairy_hats

                    Your French jokes are tending to the repetitious now.

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                    Dalek Dave
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #11

                    Rather like their defence policy. Surrender.

                    --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                    • D Dalek Dave

                      Rather like their defence policy. Surrender.

                      --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                      hairy_hats
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #12

                      :zzz: What's on the other side?

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                      • H hairy_hats

                        :zzz: What's on the other side?

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                        Dalek Dave
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #13

                        A rather interesting documentary on the German Army.

                        --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                        • A Amir Mahfoozi

                          Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!". The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, which the captain put on and lead the crew to battle the pirate boarding party. Although some casualties occurred among the crew, the pirates were repelled. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending boarding parties. The crew cowered in fear, but the captain calm as ever bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!". The battle was on, and once again the Captain and his crew repelled both boarding parties, although this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's occurrences when an ensign looked to the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?". The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, exhorted, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the wound and thus, you men will continue to fight unafraid". The men sat in silence marveling at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to their Captain for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my brown pants!!

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                          Slacker007
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #14

                          Great joke, Amir. A fiver is in order.

                          "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
                          "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011) "It is the celestial scrotum of good luck!" - Nagy Vilmos (2011) "But you probably have the smoothest scrotum of any grown man" - Pete O'Hanlon (2012)

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                          • S Slacker007

                            Great joke, Amir. A fiver is in order.

                            "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
                            "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011) "It is the celestial scrotum of good luck!" - Nagy Vilmos (2011) "But you probably have the smoothest scrotum of any grown man" - Pete O'Hanlon (2012)

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                            Amir Mahfoozi
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #15

                            Thank you Slacker ;)

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                            • D Dalek Dave

                              Rather like their defence policy. Surrender.

                              --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                              Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #16

                              Q: Why are french roads tree lined A: the german army likes to march in the shade

                              You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

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                              • D Dalek Dave

                                I first heard it as why did English Officers where Red Coats. And that is why French Officers wear Brown Trousers.

                                --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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                                K Offline
                                kiLLe_512
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #17

                                Dalek Dave wrote:

                                I first heard it as why did English Officers WEAR Red Coats.

                                :omg: FTFY. Grammar Nazi apologizes.

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