Real story, but funny.
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I read it in Private Eye way back. It was about two guys who went into hospital with a burnt arse and the other with a black eye and facial burns. They were gays. Apparently it is a thing they do whereby they put a small rodent in the arse, with the aid of a tube, and as it scrabble around it gives them pleasure. These two did that, but the rodent scrabbled too far up. The recipient asked the other to try to encourage it down, so with the aid of a cigarette lighter had a look up the tube. The recipient farted, which because of the lighter, expoloded, setting fire to the mouse, and propelled it out of the tube like a canon into the viewers face, hence the damage. :)
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I read it in Private Eye way back. It was about two guys who went into hospital with a burnt arse and the other with a black eye and facial burns. They were gays. Apparently it is a thing they do whereby they put a small rodent in the arse, with the aid of a tube, and as it scrabble around it gives them pleasure. These two did that, but the rodent scrabbled too far up. The recipient asked the other to try to encourage it down, so with the aid of a cigarette lighter had a look up the tube. The recipient farted, which because of the lighter, expoloded, setting fire to the mouse, and propelled it out of the tube like a canon into the viewers face, hence the damage. :)
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This is a very old joke with 'Geronimo', as I recall, in there somewhere. Besides, there is no way a fart would be powerful enough to expel said rodent (which would probably have suffocated by now anyway). Which leaves the final question: why the elephant would anyone a) decide this was something to try and then b) try it! I think it is called 'felching' though that could be something else as well. You see, why is it so popular that it needs its own elephanting name?
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me
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This is a very old joke with 'Geronimo', as I recall, in there somewhere. Besides, there is no way a fart would be powerful enough to expel said rodent (which would probably have suffocated by now anyway). Which leaves the final question: why the elephant would anyone a) decide this was something to try and then b) try it! I think it is called 'felching' though that could be something else as well. You see, why is it so popular that it needs its own elephanting name?
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me
mark merrens wrote:
there is no way a fart would be powerful enough to expel said rodent (which would probably have suffocated by now anyway).
Well, with the tube in place there would be enough oxygen for the fart to explode and the mouse to have breathed.
mark merrens wrote:
I think it is called 'felching'
I always was lead to understand that felching, or velching, was just licking out the anus. Yeah, OK, that isnt that nice either, so probably lets leave our levels of ignorance intact with that one.....
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I read it in Private Eye way back. It was about two guys who went into hospital with a burnt arse and the other with a black eye and facial burns. They were gays. Apparently it is a thing they do whereby they put a small rodent in the arse, with the aid of a tube, and as it scrabble around it gives them pleasure. These two did that, but the rodent scrabbled too far up. The recipient asked the other to try to encourage it down, so with the aid of a cigarette lighter had a look up the tube. The recipient farted, which because of the lighter, expoloded, setting fire to the mouse, and propelled it out of the tube like a canon into the viewers face, hence the damage. :)
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That's one way to get it out? :) We had a weather forecaster here in town years ago that got a gerbil lodged and went to the hospital to have it removed. He disappeared soon after that incident.
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I read it in Private Eye way back. It was about two guys who went into hospital with a burnt arse and the other with a black eye and facial burns. They were gays. Apparently it is a thing they do whereby they put a small rodent in the arse, with the aid of a tube, and as it scrabble around it gives them pleasure. These two did that, but the rodent scrabbled too far up. The recipient asked the other to try to encourage it down, so with the aid of a cigarette lighter had a look up the tube. The recipient farted, which because of the lighter, expoloded, setting fire to the mouse, and propelled it out of the tube like a canon into the viewers face, hence the damage. :)
============================== Nothing to say.
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This is a very old joke with 'Geronimo', as I recall, in there somewhere. Besides, there is no way a fart would be powerful enough to expel said rodent (which would probably have suffocated by now anyway). Which leaves the final question: why the elephant would anyone a) decide this was something to try and then b) try it! I think it is called 'felching' though that could be something else as well. You see, why is it so popular that it needs its own elephanting name?
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me
Although I didn't believe the story at the time, I remember it being featured in "Funny Old World" years ago. The stories there have been reported elsewhere, but the reports aren't necessarily accurate. The oddest stuff comes out of Asia and Russia usually. I find "Funny Old World" a bit hit or miss, but when it's good it's really good. In fact, if you go to Amazon, this story features on the cover of the compilation book[^].
Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
-Or-
A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^] -
I read it in Private Eye way back. It was about two guys who went into hospital with a burnt arse and the other with a black eye and facial burns. They were gays. Apparently it is a thing they do whereby they put a small rodent in the arse, with the aid of a tube, and as it scrabble around it gives them pleasure. These two did that, but the rodent scrabbled too far up. The recipient asked the other to try to encourage it down, so with the aid of a cigarette lighter had a look up the tube. The recipient farted, which because of the lighter, expoloded, setting fire to the mouse, and propelled it out of the tube like a canon into the viewers face, hence the damage. :)
============================== Nothing to say.
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I read it in Private Eye way back. It was about two guys who went into hospital with a burnt arse and the other with a black eye and facial burns. They were gays. Apparently it is a thing they do whereby they put a small rodent in the arse, with the aid of a tube, and as it scrabble around it gives them pleasure. These two did that, but the rodent scrabbled too far up. The recipient asked the other to try to encourage it down, so with the aid of a cigarette lighter had a look up the tube. The recipient farted, which because of the lighter, expoloded, setting fire to the mouse, and propelled it out of the tube like a canon into the viewers face, hence the damage. :)
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I know this story for years now and I am always happy to be reminded. It was first posted (as far as I know) on DarwinAwards: http://www.darwinawards.com/legends/legends1998-10.html[^] Additionally I found some kind of "action review" that made me laugh a lot... You can read it here: http://www.scoopy.net/humor/gerbil.htm[^] This is the best ;) Spoiler: 1)... 2)... 3)... 4)... 5) People who do this kind of thing and then admit what they were doing when taken to the emergency room. Sorry, but I think I would have made up a story about a gang of roving, pyromaniac, anal sex fiends breaking into my house and sodomizing me with a charcoal lighter before I admitted the truth. Call me old fashioned, but I just can't imagine looking at a doctor and saying "Well doc, it's like this. See we have this gerbil named Raggot and we took the cardboard tube . . ." cheers Andy
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This is a very old joke with 'Geronimo', as I recall, in there somewhere. Besides, there is no way a fart would be powerful enough to expel said rodent (which would probably have suffocated by now anyway). Which leaves the final question: why the elephant would anyone a) decide this was something to try and then b) try it! I think it is called 'felching' though that could be something else as well. You see, why is it so popular that it needs its own elephanting name?
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me
Wasn't it "Armageddon" what he shouted? If you are interested you can follow the links I provided in my "Origins" post below... I just love the "action review" :)
