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"The World's Worst Software Developer"

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  • W wizardzz

    "I do almost everything in Excel. You can call me Dave."

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    Rage
    wrote on last edited by
    #16

    :-D

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • W wizardzz

      Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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      Andrew Rissing
      wrote on last edited by
      #17

      "You said you needed database support, so I took Dave's spreadsheet[^] and added an Access backend."

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • W wizardzz

        "I spend a lot of time in The Lounge."

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        Andrew Rissing
        wrote on last edited by
        #18

        "Hm...must post another reply[^] to wizardzz newest joke thread."

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        • W wizardzz

          Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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          Rage
          wrote on last edited by
          #19

          "I build using my plain english compiler". (This is for the dinausors here.)

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          • W wizardzz

            Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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            A Offline
            Andrew Rissing
            wrote on last edited by
            #20

            "Anti-virus software?!? Who needs that I'm running a Mac."

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • W wizardzz

              Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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              L Offline
              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #21

              "Nah... we don't need to worry about patents!" [Spoken in Korean]

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              • W wizardzz

                Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                A Offline
                A Offline
                Andrew Rissing
                wrote on last edited by
                #22

                The coder who writes a Skype-like[^] website for $1,500.

                W O 2 Replies Last reply
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                • W wizardzz

                  Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #23

                  "This latest Microsoft programming paradigm is wonderful. I'm sure they'll support it for years and years!"

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • W wizardzz

                    Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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                    J Offline
                    jeron1
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #24

                    "I just broke my own record, 37 goto's in one function!"

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • A Andrew Rissing

                      The coder who writes a Skype-like[^] website for $1,500.

                      W Offline
                      W Offline
                      wizardzz
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #25

                      Wow, um, wow.

                      P 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • W wizardzz

                        Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                        L Offline
                        L Offline
                        Lost User
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #26

                        "If only I could understand recursion, I'd be able to understand recursion."

                        C 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • W wizardzz

                          Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #27

                          I tried lots of things but it not work.

                          Why is common sense not common? Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level where they are an expert. Sometimes it takes a lot of work to be lazy Please stand in front of my pistol, smile and wait for the flash - JSOP 2012

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                          • W wizardzz

                            Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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                            Nueman
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #28

                            "I don't need to comment my code because it is so readable and easy to understand."

                            What me worry?

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • W wizardzz

                              Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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                              Lost User
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #29

                              I just re-factored the algorithms down to 1 line. Your welcome.

                              Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • W wizardzz

                                Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                Lost User
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #30

                                Can we just blame this on the hardware?

                                Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • W wizardzz

                                  Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                                  L Offline
                                  L Offline
                                  Lost User
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #31

                                  All, my code is now checked in but is not compiling. See you when I get back from my week long vaco!

                                  Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Lost User

                                    "Nah... we don't need to worry about patents!" [Spoken in Korean]

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                                    Rage
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #32

                                    :-D Good reference.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • W wizardzz

                                      Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                                      A Offline
                                      A Offline
                                      Andrew Rissing
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #33

                                      "I can program my DVR, how much harder is a computer?"

                                      J 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • L Lost User

                                        "If only I could understand recursion, I'd be able to understand recursion."

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                                        C Offline
                                        Corporal Agarn
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #34

                                        Could you repeat that?

                                        C 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • A Andrew Rissing

                                          "I write in VB exclusively." J/K! :-) Couldn't help it.

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                                          M Offline
                                          Matt U
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #35

                                          I don't recall VB having a character to end each statement so I believe it should be "I write in VB exclusively" :)

                                          djj55: Nice but may have a permission problem Pete O'Hanlon: He has my permission to run it.

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