Chuck Norris Programming Jokes.
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
That's not a hard job. I can also do that in Windows 7. If you want to know how I do that, post a reply and I'll tell you how to delete the Recycle Bin.
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geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
That's not a hard job. I can also do that in Windows 7. If you want to know how I do that, post a reply and I'll tell you how to delete the Recycle Bin.
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Open Windows Explorer. Go to Organize->Folder and Search Options. Choose the tab page 'View'. Try to find the check box 'Hide protected operating system files'. Uncheck the check box. Click 'Apply'. Go to C:\ And there's the folder $Recycle.Bin!
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geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
That's not a hard job. I can also do that in Windows 7. If you want to know how I do that, post a reply and I'll tell you how to delete the Recycle Bin.
You can hide it, disable it, or delete a link to it, but you can't "delete" the recycling bin, Windows won't let you delete the underlying system folder (or if it does, it will just recreate it next time it needs it) that would imply you're putting that folder inside itself, which isn't directly possible. Unless you're Chuck Norris, of course.
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Open Windows Explorer. Go to Organize->Folder and Search Options. Choose the tab page 'View'. Try to find the check box 'Hide protected operating system files'. Uncheck the check box. Click 'Apply'. Go to C:\ And there's the folder $Recycle.Bin!
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return.
geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
Sometimes, he can do both at once. :)
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
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I fail to see the joke in this, all remarks seem to be true.You better make sure Chuck Norris does not see you use His Name in the same line as the word joke though... Cheers, AT
Cogito ergo sum
Addy Tas wrote:
You better make sure Chuck Norris does not see
Impossible, Chuck Norris sees all.
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Addy Tas wrote:
You better make sure Chuck Norris does not see
Impossible, Chuck Norris sees all.
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You can hide it, disable it, or delete a link to it, but you can't "delete" the recycling bin, Windows won't let you delete the underlying system folder (or if it does, it will just recreate it next time it needs it) that would imply you're putting that folder inside itself, which isn't directly possible. Unless you're Chuck Norris, of course.
Sorry to somewhat ruin it :) - you can put a folder inside itself with hard links (junction points in NTFS).
He who asks a question is a fool for five minutes. He who does not ask a question remains a fool forever. [Chineese Proverb] Jonathan C Dickinson (C# Software Engineer)
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geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return.
geekbond wrote:
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
Sometimes, he can do both at once. :)
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
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Sorry to somewhat ruin it :) - you can put a folder inside itself with hard links (junction points in NTFS).
He who asks a question is a fool for five minutes. He who does not ask a question remains a fool forever. [Chineese Proverb] Jonathan C Dickinson (C# Software Engineer)
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I already said you can delete a link. The folder still has to exist somewhere else for a hard link. A folder can't exist only inside itself, because then it wouldn't be anywhere else.
This is starting to sound like a certain cat and a box.
He who asks a question is a fool for five minutes. He who does not ask a question remains a fool forever. [Chineese Proverb] Jonathan C Dickinson (C# Software Engineer)
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
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You can hide it, disable it, or delete a link to it, but you can't "delete" the recycling bin, Windows won't let you delete the underlying system folder (or if it does, it will just recreate it next time it needs it) that would imply you're putting that folder inside itself, which isn't directly possible. Unless you're Chuck Norris, of course.
The easiest way to delete a System Protected File/Folder is to boot with a Linux live CD. Other way is to give to yourself the ownership of the folder you want to delete, but that may fail, because if a file is in use it may not let you delete it. The two protected folders I can think one person may want to delete, due to virus for example, are System Volume Information (you will lose all restore points, one SVI exists in root of each partition, even if not supervised), and $Recycle.Bin. Both folders will be recreated at next boot, but their content won't return (for good if you suspect virus). These advise (if I can name it that way) are for the common of humans. Linux Gurus and Chuck Norris don't need these cheap tricks :laugh: .
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
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1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room. 2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds. 3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up. 4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself. 5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal. 6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick(). 7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9. 8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble. 9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue. 10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it). 11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return. 12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move. 13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object. 14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft. 15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever. 16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him. 17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris. 18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way. 19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts. 20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin. 21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm. 22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert. 23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing. 24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris. 25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”. A student throwing paper airplanes in class was asked by the teacher during detention to write on the board the sentence, 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' 500 times. He then writes this
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Love this, unfortunately I clicked on '2' when navigating to '5' for voting and now can't change it. I wonder if Chuck will notice.., wait, he notices everything. I'd better hide.
