Man with an ostrich
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A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?' 'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke' The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same' Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress. 'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man. 'Same,' says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.' Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time? 'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.' 'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live. It's brilliant!'' That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact amount of money is always there,' says the man. The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?' The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt & long legs who agrees with everything I say' MORAL OF THE STORY: Men are brilliant until they think about a woman!
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A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?' 'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke' The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same' Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress. 'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man. 'Same,' says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.' Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time? 'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.' 'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live. It's brilliant!'' That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact amount of money is always there,' says the man. The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?' The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt & long legs who agrees with everything I say' MORAL OF THE STORY: Men are brilliant until they think about a woman!
The version I know has the bloke with his emu and a cat... Every time he orders something, the cat says "I'm not paying". Rest of the joke pretty much the same. Punchline is that he wished for a "chick with long legs and a tight pussy".
Quad skating his way through the world since the early 80's... Booger Mobile - My bright green 1964 Ford Falcon - check out the blog here!! | If you feel generous - make a donation to Camp Quality!!
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The version I know has the bloke with his emu and a cat... Every time he orders something, the cat says "I'm not paying". Rest of the joke pretty much the same. Punchline is that he wished for a "chick with long legs and a tight pussy".
Quad skating his way through the world since the early 80's... Booger Mobile - My bright green 1964 Ford Falcon - check out the blog here!! | If you feel generous - make a donation to Camp Quality!!
Was that the same guy who had a 12 inch pianist?
MVVM # - I did it My Way ___________________________________________ Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011 .\\axxx (That's an 'M')
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Was that the same guy who had a 12 inch pianist?
MVVM # - I did it My Way ___________________________________________ Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011 .\\axxx (That's an 'M')
Different bloke, same hard-of-hearing genie!!
Quad skating his way through the world since the early 80's... Booger Mobile - My bright green 1964 Ford Falcon - check out the blog here!! | If you feel generous - make a donation to Camp Quality!!
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A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?' 'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke' The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same' Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress. 'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man. 'Same,' says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.' Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time? 'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.' 'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live. It's brilliant!'' That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact amount of money is always there,' says the man. The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?' The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt & long legs who agrees with everything I say' MORAL OF THE STORY: Men are brilliant until they think about a woman!
So true! :thumbsup: Although I think, no IT guys out there would believe that genies exist. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Don't mind those people who say you're not HOT. At least you know you're COOL.
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A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?' 'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke' The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same' Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress. 'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man. 'Same,' says the ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.' Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time? 'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.' 'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live. It's brilliant!'' That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact amount of money is always there,' says the man. The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?' The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt & long legs who agrees with everything I say' MORAL OF THE STORY: Men are brilliant until they think about a woman!
Vivic wrote:
full-grown ostrich
Vivic wrote:
chick
So he didn't get what he wanted then since a chick is not a full grown bird but a baby.