When does a condom feel it is useless?

Nish Nishant

When it is in a locked room with a lesbian and a gay male. Nish p.s. This is an original joke I just thought up by myself :-) So you won't find this anywhere else. p.s. #2 I bet this is the first original joke posted on the soap-box

Author of the romantic comedy Summer Love and Some more Cricket [New Win] Review by Shog9 Click here for review[NW]

David Wulff

Hey a mouth's a mouth and one tongue is as good as the next. * Anyway comdoms can provide endless hours of fun no matter who or where you are, without having to resort to "standard" sex. * [edit] I am of course referring to safe oral sex, i.e. the condom would be used [/edit] Now here's a question to puzzle over... A gay, a lesbian, a bisexual and a straight person (can be of either sex) locked in a room together. Who is the luckiest? :rolleyes: ** Well this is the Soapbox where political correctness and good jokes are not important **

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

Nish Nishant

David Wulff wrote: A gay, a lesbian, a bisexual and a straight person (can be of either sex) locked in a room together. Who is the luckiest? Lets take them one by one :- (For the sake of simplicity I assume the straight one and the bisexual are male) (1) The gay He has no use for the lesbian or the straight person. Bu the bi is useful. So the gay has 1 point In fact he can also derive pleasure from ogling at the straight one which gives him 0.5 points Total = 1.5 points (2) The lesbian She has no use for the gay, the bi or the straight person Total points = 0 (3) The straight one He has no use for the bisexual or the gay. But he can ogle at the lesbian Total points = 0.5 (4) The bisexual - he can enjoy the gay (1 point)and can ogle at both the straight one and the lesbian (0.5 + 0.5) Total = 2 points So the winner is the bisexual Regards, Nish

Author of the romantic comedy Summer Love and Some more Cricket [New Win] Review by Shog9 Click here for review[NW]

David Wulff

Lol, I wasn't expecting a real answer! Ok, so let's run through the possibilities (I've used using your scoring approach)... gay, lesbian, bi female, straight male: g: 0.5 (the straight guy) = 0.5 l: 1 (the bi chick) = 1 b: 1 (the lesbian) and 1 (the straight guy) and 0.5 (the gay guy) = 2.5 s: 0.5 (the lesbian) and 0.5 (the bi chick) = 1 gay, lesbian, bi female, straight female: g: 0 (no guys and the conversation would be crap) = 0 l: 1 (the bi chick) and 0.5 (the straight chick) = 1.5 b: 1 (the lesbian) and 0.5 (the straight chick) = 1.5 s: 0.5 (the gay guy) = 0.5 gay, lesbian, bi male, straight male: g: 1 (the bi guy) and 0.5 (the straight guy) = 1.5 l: 0 (no chicks and *no* conversation) = 0 b: 1 (the gay guy) and 0.5 (the straight guy) = 1.5 s: 0.5 (the lesbian) = 0.5 gay, lesbian, bi male, straight female: g: 1 (the bi guy) = 1 l: 0.5 (the straight chick) = 0.5 b: 1 (the gay guy), 1 (the straight chick) and 0.5 (the lesbian) = 2.5 s: 0.5 (the guy guy) and 0.5 (the bi male) = 1 Final scores: g: 3 l: 3 b: 7.5 / 2 (both sexes) = 3.75 s: 3.5 / 2 (both sexes) = 1.75 I therefore conclude: - everybody loves the lesbian and the gay though not as much as they'd like - the bisexual has more fun overall and gets more intense enjoyment - the straights lead very boring lives :laugh:

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

Anna Jayne Metcalfe

Hey who says all bis are male? :laugh: Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

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Anna Jayne Metcalfe

There's hope for me yet then. ;) I'm not sure what I am yet but I'm fairly sure straight isn't it. :-O Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

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David Stone

Nishant S wrote: a lesbian and a gay male. Have you had a lot of exposure to those in San Fran, Nish? ;P

any idiot can write haiku you just stop at seventeenth syl -ThinkGeek Fortunes

David Stone

Whst would straight be for you, Anna? :~

any idiot can write haiku you just stop at seventeenth syl -ThinkGeek Fortunes

Anna Jayne Metcalfe

Actually, it's pretty clear cut. Sexuality is defined in relation to gender, not physical sex. My gender identity is strongly female according to my psych profile, so for me a straight relationship would be one with a male (natal or female-to-male TS). A lesbian relationship would be one with a female (natal, or pre- or post-op TS). In effect, every relationship I've ever been in was a lesbian one. Although that may change in future (the potential is there, I can feel it) I'm not putting any money on it. It rather depends on who I meet, doesn't it? It's a bit mind-blowing I know, but something I have to face up to. I don't intend to spend the rest of my life alone. Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

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Shog9 0

David Wulff wrote: locked in a room together. Who is the luckiest? The one who gets out! ---

My whole life I've practiced the art of self-sabotage -- fearing success perhaps even more than fearing failure. I think I have got this flareup resolved, but I'm constantly waiting to see what new and exciting ways I can spoil my chances for a better life. - koreykruse, Compulsive Skin Picking

David Wulff

Men. They lead such sheltered lives, bless 'em. :laugh:

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

David Wulff

Bah, where's your sense of adventure? :~

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

David Wulff

Ah, ain't life fun! :-D

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

Anna Jayne Metcalfe

It sure is an adventure! :rolleyes: Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Add-In for Visual C++

Anna Jayne Metcalfe

I've noticed. ;) Anna :rose: www.annasplace.me.uk

"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch

Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Add-In for Visual C++

Shog9 0

Ok, here are the problems with your rundown: #1: You scored unrequited lust as .5, as though it would contribute positively to that local social environment. I beg to differ - being around someone you care nothing for who wants you sucks. Almost as much as being around someone you want who cares nothing for you. It makes things awkward, and really takes the fun out of some otherwise good jokes. #2: You also used simple addition to calculate the totals, treating each potential pair as though it existed in a void. In truth however, many of these would be quite awkward - the straight guy and the lesbian both going after the bi chick, the bi guy and the straight guy both going after the bi chick, etc. Since you said nothing about pre-existing relationships, i would assume these were all strangers. Worst-case (and not unlikely) scenario would produce rather some nasty competition. And no-one laughs at your jokes, even if they're funny, if they see you as competition. So what do we have? Some people locked in a room, feeling awkward and resentful of each other. Oh, and claustraphobic... David Wulff wrote: Bah, where's your sense of adventure? Adventure nothing! When i want to be masochistic, i'll spend some quality time alone with my knives... --- Another factor that *could* be figured in... it's worth noting you didn't specify how *long* they would be locked up. Assuming several days to a week, and remembering you didn't mention food, my guess would be the lucky one would be the one who most liked eating raw dead human flesh. Donno how you'd go about applying this to your stats though... ---

My whole life I've practiced the art of self-sabotage -- fearing success perhaps even more than fearing failure. I think I have got this flareup resolved, but I'm constantly waiting to see what new and exciting ways I can spoil my chances for a better life. - koreykruse, Compulsive Skin Picking

Nish Nishant

Dave One of us, or perhaps both of us must be crazy :-) Nish

Author of the romantic comedy Summer Love and Some more Cricket [New Win] Review by Shog9 Click here for review[NW]

David Wulff

You forgot the most important one: #3: It is very unlikely, nigh on impossible, that you will get exactly one of person having each of those distinct orientations in one small room that also happens to be locked. Shog9 wrote: Adventure nothing! When i want to be masochistic, i'll spend some quality time alone with my knives... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Oh wait, you were being serious. :~

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

David Wulff

I prefer the term mentally different... :rolleyes:

David Wulff

"David Wulff can't live without me, so you shouldn't either" - Paul Watson

Nish Nishant

David Wulff wrote: mentally different mentally different and behaviorally distinguished - thats what you and I are Nish :-)

Author of the romantic comedy Summer Love and Some more Cricket [New Win] Review by Shog9 Click here for review[NW]