A shipwreck survivor ...
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....washes up on the beach of an island and is immediately surrounded by a group of native warriors. "I'm done for", the man cries in despair. "No you are not," comes a booming voice from the heavens. "Listen carefully, and do exactly as I say. Grab the spear from the one who is beside you and shove it through the heart of the chief." The man does so, and the remainder of the band stare in disbelief. "Now, what?" the man asks the heavens. "Now, you are done for."
Sounds like my divorce lawyer!
Here today gone to Maui...
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Sounds like my divorce lawyer!
Here today gone to Maui...
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Can't say all lawyers because my brother is a lawyer, one of the few honest and caring ones I know.
Here today gone to Maui...
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....washes up on the beach of an island and is immediately surrounded by a group of native warriors. "I'm done for", the man cries in despair. "No you are not," comes a booming voice from the heavens. "Listen carefully, and do exactly as I say. Grab the spear from the one who is beside you and shove it through the heart of the chief." The man does so, and the remainder of the band stare in disbelief. "Now, what?" the man asks the heavens. "Now, you are done for."
A beautiful young lady is shipwrecked on a tropical isle and is dragged ashore by a cannibal and his young son. "We're not going to be hungry tonight" said the cannibal to his son. "Are we going to eat her, dad?" said the son. "No lad, we're going to eat your mother!"
========================================================= I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka. =========================================================
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A beautiful young lady is shipwrecked on a tropical isle and is dragged ashore by a cannibal and his young son. "We're not going to be hungry tonight" said the cannibal to his son. "Are we going to eat her, dad?" said the son. "No lad, we're going to eat your mother!"
========================================================= I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka. =========================================================
:laugh:
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A beautiful young lady is shipwrecked on a tropical isle and is dragged ashore by a cannibal and his young son. "We're not going to be hungry tonight" said the cannibal to his son. "Are we going to eat her, dad?" said the son. "No lad, we're going to eat your mother!"
========================================================= I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka. =========================================================
:thumbsup: Similar An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "What is this Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is" While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out. The father said quietly to his son....."Go get your mother."
Here today gone to Maui...
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Can't say all lawyers because my brother is a lawyer, one of the few honest and caring ones I know.
Here today gone to Maui...
Just goes to show how little you really knows your own family when it comes down to it... ;)
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time -
:thumbsup: Similar An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "What is this Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is" While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out. The father said quietly to his son....."Go get your mother."
Here today gone to Maui...
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I'm pretty sure (read: almost entirely certain) I heard this one from you originally. Seeing it again has reminded me of all the laughs I've received when retelling it. :thumbsup:
Yeah it probably was me but I'm old and I forget a lot. For instance...???
Here today gone to Maui...
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Yeah it probably was me but I'm old and I forget a lot. For instance...???
Here today gone to Maui...
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Sorry, what were we talking about again? :laugh: Nah, seriously though - I've given and received much joy sharing jokes from both you and Espen. Many thanks.
Your welcome, I think both Espen and I TRY to keep the quality and uniqueness fresh but sometimes we slip.
Here today gone to Maui...
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....washes up on the beach of an island and is immediately surrounded by a group of native warriors. "I'm done for", the man cries in despair. "No you are not," comes a booming voice from the heavens. "Listen carefully, and do exactly as I say. Grab the spear from the one who is beside you and shove it through the heart of the chief." The man does so, and the remainder of the band stare in disbelief. "Now, what?" the man asks the heavens. "Now, you are done for."
Excellent! :P
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