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More strangeness from Professionals

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  • M Member 10707677

    I picked up a book entitled "What Colour is My Parachute" a few years back which contains sound advice regarding writing a CV. It was so effective that my CV has been used by prospective employers as an example of staff they have at hand when bidding on projects. Imagine reading your own CV among bid proposals for projects your clients are funding. (Strange -- none of the proposals were successful.)

    The difficult may take time, the impossible a little longer.

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    glennPattonPub
    wrote on last edited by
    #13

    Thanks for the title, just ordered it from Amazon :thumbsup:

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    • L Lost User

      Unless your CV s completely shit, and you can't be bothered, of course they're not worth it! I had feedback from two agencies on my CV. 1. Too wordy - need to be more succinct. bullet points not prose. 2. To much like a list of bullet points - need to expand and put experiences in a personal manner. That tells me I have it about right!

      PooperPig - Coming Soon

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      glennPattonPub
      wrote on last edited by
      #14

      I think all agents have a secret style of CV they just don't tell anyone else! I mean I have seen over wordy CV (such as one guy who told the world 'I was afraid of heights, so I learnt to parachute to over come it', why? would working at a desk be subject to working at heights?). The problem in the UK (at least) is the Arts grads and failed engineers who recruit for these roles you have to get the CV past them and on to some one who knows what MIET stands for! :wtf:

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      • G glennPattonPub

        I think all agents have a secret style of CV they just don't tell anyone else! I mean I have seen over wordy CV (such as one guy who told the world 'I was afraid of heights, so I learnt to parachute to over come it', why? would working at a desk be subject to working at heights?). The problem in the UK (at least) is the Arts grads and failed engineers who recruit for these roles you have to get the CV past them and on to some one who knows what MIET stands for! :wtf:

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        Lost User
        wrote on last edited by
        #15

        To be fair, taking up parachuting to overcome fear of heights tells you a lot about a person. They watch too many "xxx's got talent" auditions, and confuse this with the real world

        PooperPig - Coming Soon

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        • G glennPattonPub

          Thanks for the title, just ordered it from Amazon :thumbsup:

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          User 11104456
          wrote on last edited by
          #16

          Be advised guys, in the UK lies on the CV: Theft (Amendment) Act 1996, it read: (1) A person who by any deception dishonestly obtains services from another shall be guilty of an offence. (2) It is an obtaining of services where the other is induced to confer a benefit by doing some act, or causing or permitting some act to be done, on the understanding that the benefit has been or will be paid for. (3) Without prejudice to the generality of subsection (2) above, it is an obtaining of services where the other is induced to make a loan, or to cause or permit a loan to be made, on the understanding that any payment (whether by way of interest or otherwise) will be or has been made in respect of the loan. So that ruddy bloke altering your CV isn't doing you any favours. Like wise lying on job applications. Good luck.

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          • U User 11104456

            Be advised guys, in the UK lies on the CV: Theft (Amendment) Act 1996, it read: (1) A person who by any deception dishonestly obtains services from another shall be guilty of an offence. (2) It is an obtaining of services where the other is induced to confer a benefit by doing some act, or causing or permitting some act to be done, on the understanding that the benefit has been or will be paid for. (3) Without prejudice to the generality of subsection (2) above, it is an obtaining of services where the other is induced to make a loan, or to cause or permit a loan to be made, on the understanding that any payment (whether by way of interest or otherwise) will be or has been made in respect of the loan. So that ruddy bloke altering your CV isn't doing you any favours. Like wise lying on job applications. Good luck.

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            H Offline
            Herbie Mountjoy
            wrote on last edited by
            #17

            My experience is that the CV is used to filter applicants. You tune it to get into the interview shortlist. It's really the references and the interview that get you the position. I have seen cvs from glossy brochures to hand written notes. Most of them ended up in the bin. The best advice I have is keep it short and succinct, i.e. one A4 page. Managers don't have time to read War and Peace.

            I may not last forever but the mess I leave behind certainly will.

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            • H Herbie Mountjoy

              My experience is that the CV is used to filter applicants. You tune it to get into the interview shortlist. It's really the references and the interview that get you the position. I have seen cvs from glossy brochures to hand written notes. Most of them ended up in the bin. The best advice I have is keep it short and succinct, i.e. one A4 page. Managers don't have time to read War and Peace.

              I may not last forever but the mess I leave behind certainly will.

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              glennPattonPub
              wrote on last edited by
              #18

              I think it's insane I had a one pager, rejected by all, the problem is I am having to through agents who presumably take my two pages listing nearly every qualification I have (alright the two swimming metals I won at 13 aren't on there yet) and condense it down to a page I'm guessing but I'm sure certain things aren't on there because it doesn't make sense to them... :|

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              • U User 11104456

                Be advised guys, in the UK lies on the CV: Theft (Amendment) Act 1996, it read: (1) A person who by any deception dishonestly obtains services from another shall be guilty of an offence. (2) It is an obtaining of services where the other is induced to confer a benefit by doing some act, or causing or permitting some act to be done, on the understanding that the benefit has been or will be paid for. (3) Without prejudice to the generality of subsection (2) above, it is an obtaining of services where the other is induced to make a loan, or to cause or permit a loan to be made, on the understanding that any payment (whether by way of interest or otherwise) will be or has been made in respect of the loan. So that ruddy bloke altering your CV isn't doing you any favours. Like wise lying on job applications. Good luck.

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                G Offline
                glennPattonPub
                wrote on last edited by
                #19

                Mmmm, interesting :-D

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                • G glennPattonPub

                  I think it's insane I had a one pager, rejected by all, the problem is I am having to through agents who presumably take my two pages listing nearly every qualification I have (alright the two swimming metals I won at 13 aren't on there yet) and condense it down to a page I'm guessing but I'm sure certain things aren't on there because it doesn't make sense to them... :|

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                  Herbie Mountjoy
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #20

                  These days it looks as if you have to second guess what the HR department want. What is flavour of the month? Do they have a pet curve ball test? Are they interested in swimming medals or do they focus on qualifications related to the post? Are they looking for someone who will be a team hi fiver or someone who can go it alone? Maybe an agent will know the answers to these questions but frankly, I doubt it.

                  I may not last forever but the mess I leave behind certainly will.

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                  • H Herbie Mountjoy

                    These days it looks as if you have to second guess what the HR department want. What is flavour of the month? Do they have a pet curve ball test? Are they interested in swimming medals or do they focus on qualifications related to the post? Are they looking for someone who will be a team hi fiver or someone who can go it alone? Maybe an agent will know the answers to these questions but frankly, I doubt it.

                    I may not last forever but the mess I leave behind certainly will.

                    G Offline
                    G Offline
                    glennPattonPub
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #21

                    You & me both!:cool:

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                    • G glennPattonPub

                      Hi All, I am back on the Job Market again. I had a phone call yesterday from a Recruitment Professional out of the blue (apparently I had click on the review my CV button(?)) He told me while I was not in a good position to take it in that my CV contained too many personal details and so on. Now I do agree but the 'recruitment agents' will not often entertain a CV without them. I get a feeling that was the set up for I can alter it but it will cost X pounds for it.... any idea if these so called services are worth it?:confused:

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                      RASPeter
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #22

                      The most important advice I ever got on creating a CV is that it should be one page. No more, no less. If it's less, it'll look empty. If it's more, well, you can pretty much guarantee that any additional pages will be lost as it gets passed around to the various people that might review it. Plus, with only one page you get to avoid the endless war between office drones who prefer staples and the ones who prefer paper clips (and no matter which one you pick you'll always be wrong).

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                      • R RASPeter

                        The most important advice I ever got on creating a CV is that it should be one page. No more, no less. If it's less, it'll look empty. If it's more, well, you can pretty much guarantee that any additional pages will be lost as it gets passed around to the various people that might review it. Plus, with only one page you get to avoid the endless war between office drones who prefer staples and the ones who prefer paper clips (and no matter which one you pick you'll always be wrong).

                        G Offline
                        G Offline
                        glennPattonPub
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #23

                        The problem I have is that I 'have' to go through 'professional' recruitment agency, I have done a one pager and had that rejected as there was not enough detail. I have tended to avoid the staples or paper clips by sending it as a Word Document (.doc not .docx as that can cause problems). Last week I had a professional who proceeded to rip my CV to shreds while offering 'free' services who then would not send me an E-mail with his recommendations as it was a 'free' session :wtf: (his main justification was well what I am saying is right I have a job you don't! :omg: ). People wonder why this country is in the bucket they need to employ people for what they are good at.

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