Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • World
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Code Project
  1. Home
  2. The Lounge
  3. A Difference Between Cats And Dogs

A Difference Between Cats And Dogs

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
wcfdata-structuresxmltutorial
14 Posts 9 Posters 1 Views 1 Watching
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • R Roger Wright

    All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

    • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
    • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
    • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
    • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
    • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
    • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
    • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
    • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
    • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
    • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
    N Offline
    N Offline
    Nagy Vilmos
    wrote on last edited by
    #2

    Pterry said that every method for giving a cat a pill works. Once.

    veni bibi saltavi

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • R Roger Wright

      All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

      • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
      • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
      • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
      • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
      • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
      • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
      • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
      • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
      • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
      • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
      L Offline
      L Offline
      l a u r e n
      wrote on last edited by
      #3

      hey roger happy xmas :) how's life?

      "mostly watching the human race is like watching dogs watch tv ... they see the pictures move but the meaning escapes them"

      R 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • R Roger Wright

        All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

        • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
        • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
        • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
        • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
        • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
        • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
        • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
        • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
        • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
        • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
        9 Offline
        9 Offline
        9082365
        wrote on last edited by
        #4

        Roger Wright wrote:

        Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

        Well there's your problem. I have no idea what you swallowing is supposed to do. Are you hoping for some kind of sympathetic telekinetic effect?

        OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • 9 9082365

          Roger Wright wrote:

          Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

          Well there's your problem. I have no idea what you swallowing is supposed to do. Are you hoping for some kind of sympathetic telekinetic effect?

          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriff
          wrote on last edited by
          #5

          No, you swallow with apprehension of what is about to happen...:~

          Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...

          "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
          "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • R Roger Wright

            All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

            • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
            • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
            • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
            • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
            • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
            • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
            • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
            • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
            • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
            • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #6

            Now that you tried the pill, lets move on to suppositories :)

            Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^][](X-Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett)

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • R Roger Wright

              All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

              • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
              • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
              • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
              • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
              • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
              • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
              • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
              • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
              • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
              • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
              Mike HankeyM Offline
              Mike HankeyM Offline
              Mike Hankey
              wrote on last edited by
              #7

              Whenever there was reason to give our cat a pill, my daughter in law lived with us and she and my son gave the cat said pill. I left the house. She had plenty of experience, her mom has 20+ indoor cats and numerous outdoor ones.

              New version: WinHeist Version
              You didn't fall from the stupid tree you got dragged through the whole dumbass forest.

              9 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • L l a u r e n

                hey roger happy xmas :) how's life?

                "mostly watching the human race is like watching dogs watch tv ... they see the pictures move but the meaning escapes them"

                R Offline
                R Offline
                Roger Wright
                wrote on last edited by
                #8

                You, too, Lauren! Life's great, thanks, since I quit my job this week! :-D How's things with you?

                Will Rogers never met me.

                L 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                  Whenever there was reason to give our cat a pill, my daughter in law lived with us and she and my son gave the cat said pill. I left the house. She had plenty of experience, her mom has 20+ indoor cats and numerous outdoor ones.

                  New version: WinHeist Version
                  You didn't fall from the stupid tree you got dragged through the whole dumbass forest.

                  9 Offline
                  9 Offline
                  9082365
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #9

                  Doesn't one have servants for that sort of thing?

                  OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • 9 9082365

                    Doesn't one have servants for that sort of thing?

                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                    OriginalGriff
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #10

                    Servants can take their own pills, you don't have to wrap them in towels and force their jaws open.

                    Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...

                    "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                    "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • R Roger Wright

                      You, too, Lauren! Life's great, thanks, since I quit my job this week! :-D How's things with you?

                      Will Rogers never met me.

                      L Offline
                      L Offline
                      l a u r e n
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #11

                      over-worked as usual but enjoying life in berlin for now - more travels in the new year to south africa and seattle - i really must try to get down to hell bullhead city again to visit :)

                      "mostly watching the human race is like watching dogs watch tv ... they see the pictures move but the meaning escapes them"

                      R 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • L l a u r e n

                        over-worked as usual but enjoying life in berlin for now - more travels in the new year to south africa and seattle - i really must try to get down to hell bullhead city again to visit :)

                        "mostly watching the human race is like watching dogs watch tv ... they see the pictures move but the meaning escapes them"

                        R Offline
                        R Offline
                        Roger Wright
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #12

                        You're always welcome, and I have a much better selection of firearms for you to try out! :-D

                        Will Rogers never met me.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • R Roger Wright

                          All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

                          • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
                          • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
                          • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
                          • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
                          • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
                          • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
                          • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
                          • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
                          • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
                          • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
                          P Offline
                          P Offline
                          PIEBALDconsult
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #13

                          Simple two-step process for giving a cat a pill: remove the cat's head. Shove the pill down its throat.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • R Roger Wright

                            All pets need medications from time to time to keep them healthy, but there are significant differences between the methods required to administer said meds, to wit: How to give the cat a pill

                            • Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
                            • Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
                            • Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
                            • Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
                            • Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
                            • Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
                            • Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
                            • Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
                            • Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
                            • Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth foll
                            G Offline
                            G Offline
                            Gary R Wheeler
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #14

                            Sigh. I know you don't like cats Roger, but... Giving cats pills is actually a lot easier than most dogs. Any dog bigger than about 25 pounds or so is large enough you have a hard time poking a pill down its throat far enough to keep it from spitting it back out. My English setter was adept at the 'hide it and then spit it out later' trick. Conversely, I had a cat who took 3-4 pills a day for the last four years of his life. Granted, he was an easygoing cat, but he actually ran back to the laundry room where we kept his meds when it was time. He knew that he got a treat after he took his pills. I got so good at it I could give him all of his pills at once with a single motion that only took a couple seconds. (Yeah folks, I know this is a joke)

                            Software Zen: delete this;

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            Reply
                            • Reply as topic
                            Log in to reply
                            • Oldest to Newest
                            • Newest to Oldest
                            • Most Votes


                            • Login

                            • Don't have an account? Register

                            • Login or register to search.
                            • First post
                              Last post
                            0
                            • Categories
                            • Recent
                            • Tags
                            • Popular
                            • World
                            • Users
                            • Groups