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Excellent quotes

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  • K Kyle Moyer

    I'm never sure if I've heard a joke somewhere or made it up myself (I like to think the latter) but... What's the difference between Windows 1.0 and Windows 10? Windows 10 has no point! I'll get my coat.

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    Mark_Wallace
    wrote on last edited by
    #23

    Unfortunately, there's one thing I can't blame winio for, and that's the 191 lines of reply to you that simply vanished because I dared to use the COMCTL32 Save window (it's not a dialog), which crashed notepad++ simply because I wanted to save what I had already written (I could still see the window, behind the "Notepad++ has crashed" notification, so I know it was 191 lines) (google the problem, and just imagine my anger at having lost so much time because of a @#$%^&* OS error). That problem has existed since weven, and it's a pretty fruggin' major problem, but adding baby blocks and spyware were obviously more important to MS than fixing major problems for their users. I'll go through it all again when my blood pressure drops below volcanic.

    I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

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    • C Chris Maunder

      As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

      Quote:

      I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

      It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

      cheers Chris Maunder

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      Kevin Marois
      wrote on last edited by
      #24

      Actual call to support: "My cup holder won't open"

      If it's not broken, fix it until it is

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      • Sander RosselS Sander Rossel

        I never said it didn't apply to IT. I'm simply saying not only to IT. More like, anyplace anywhere anytime :)

        Read my (free) ebook Object-Oriented Programming in C# Succinctly. Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles here on CodeProject.

        Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

        Regards, Sander

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        Mark_Wallace
        wrote on last edited by
        #25

        Zeker, maar het was Linux Torvalds.

        I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

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        • C Chris Maunder

          As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

          Quote:

          I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

          It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

          cheers Chris Maunder

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          RedDk
          wrote on last edited by
          #26

          As we know, there are known knowns. There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say, we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns; the one we don't know we don't know. (IT? Well, in all honesty, I'm sure this nugget was forwarded under truly knowing circumstances. So please forgive me if you deem it not IT)

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          • J Jacquers

            "Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

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            maze3
            wrote on last edited by
            #27

            Like many quotes, people always forget the surrounding context. "Is it switched on?" "Yes." "Have you tried turning it off and on". "Yes."

            Jacquers wrote:

            "Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

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            • C Chris Maunder

              As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

              Quote:

              I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

              It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

              cheers Chris Maunder

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              Duke Carey
              wrote on last edited by
              #28

              Look, we all have something to bring to this discussion. But I think from now on the thing you should bring is silence. — Arnold Rimmer, Red Dwarf

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              • R RedDk

                As we know, there are known knowns. There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say, we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns; the one we don't know we don't know. (IT? Well, in all honesty, I'm sure this nugget was forwarded under truly knowing circumstances. So please forgive me if you deem it not IT)

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                Jeroen_R
                wrote on last edited by
                #29

                Was Rumsfeld talking about quantum computing instead of lying about Iraq? :omg:

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                • C Chris Maunder

                  As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                  Quote:

                  I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                  It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                  cheers Chris Maunder

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                  Jeroen_R
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #30

                  What? No-one posted the classic: There are only two hard things in Computer Science: cache invalidation, naming things and off-by-one errors.

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                  • C Chris Maunder

                    As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                    Quote:

                    I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                    It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                    cheers Chris Maunder

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                    crazedDotNetDev
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #31

                    "I thought you called to confess." – said by a sysadmin as we investigated why a production server magically rebooted.

                    - great coders make code look easy - When humans are doing things computers could be doing instead, the computers get together late at night and laugh at us. - ¿Neal Ford?

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                    • W W Balboos GHB

                      Check to see if it floats in salt-water. If it sinks then it was defective.

                      Ravings en masse^

                      "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein

                      "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010

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                      James Curran
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #32

                      W∴ Balboos wrote:

                      If it sinks then it was defective.

                      NoNoNo.... If it floats, it's defective. If it sinks, it was good. (If the floaters were good, you'd have to keep using them...)

                      Truth, James

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                      • J James Curran

                        W∴ Balboos wrote:

                        If it sinks then it was defective.

                        NoNoNo.... If it floats, it's defective. If it sinks, it was good. (If the floaters were good, you'd have to keep using them...)

                        Truth, James

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                        W Balboos GHB
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #33

                        Take your laptop, or better still, you cell phone, and test my hypothesis.

                        Ravings en masse^

                        "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein

                        "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010

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                        • W W Balboos GHB

                          Take your laptop, or better still, you cell phone, and test my hypothesis.

                          Ravings en masse^

                          "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein

                          "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010

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                          James Curran
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #34

                          I think you're missing the point (the point: You want to ensure the thing being "tested" is replaced, one way or another)

                          Truth, James

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                          • C Chris Maunder

                            As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                            Quote:

                            I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                            It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                            cheers Chris Maunder

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                            MikeTheFid
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #35

                            One of my favourites of all time: "More people have ascended bodily to heaven than have shipped great software on time." Jim McCarthy One of my co-workers once said in a meeting in which we were discussing null: "There are many different kinds of nothing." Trevor Stokes :)

                            Cheers, Mike Fidler "I intend to live forever - so far, so good." Steven Wright "I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met." Also Steven Wright "I'm addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn't matter." Steven Wright yet again.

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                            • F Forogar

                              Thomas John Watson Sr. was the chairman and CEO of International Business Machines (IBM) and stated in 1943, "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers". How right he was!

                              - I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

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                              Kirk 10389821
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #36

                              In his defense, he meant ROOM SIZED mainframes that required $$$millions of investments, tons of air conditioning, and "operators" to "operate" the dang thing. He was not thinking "toys" people would carry with them and continuously be distracted by :-)

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                              • C Chris Maunder

                                As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                                Quote:

                                I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                                It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                                cheers Chris Maunder

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                                BrainiacV
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #37

                                A story I was told by an engineer at One IBM Plaza in Chicago, IL was that there was a model of the S/360 that was so buggy that the engineers threw it into Lake Michigan where it...

                                Sank intermittently.

                                Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.

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                                • C Chris Maunder

                                  As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                                  Quote:

                                  I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                                  It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                                  cheers Chris Maunder

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                                  thewazz
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #38

                                  you know that link goes to an essentially empty page?

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • C Chris Maunder

                                    As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                                    Quote:

                                    I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                                    It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                                    cheers Chris Maunder

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                                    I Offline
                                    ineedajobsoon
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #39

                                    When I was in the Army, equipment troubleshooting always began with... Make sure the O N O F F switch is in the O N position.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • C Chris Maunder

                                      As much as I hate feeding this guy's ego, I do love a good quote. In response to the thread about Linus I was wandering through Wikiquotes[^] and found

                                      Quote:

                                      I hope I won't end up having to hunt you all down and kill you in your sleep

                                      It got me thinking: what are your favourite IT related quotes? The "640KB should be good enough for anyone" doesn't count: it's past the statute of limitations.

                                      cheers Chris Maunder

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                                      M Offline
                                      Mark Kruger
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #40

                                      Back in the Windows 95 age i had a program which throwed a random message from it's messagelist each day. A few nice ones i still remember: 2B or not 2B, that's FF. On an empty disk u can seek forever. Press once to quit, twice to save. Besides this i always loved DeeDee (from Dexter's laboratory), "Dexter, what does this buttton doooo?" (Asking while trying) And last but not least comming from a programmers book, don't recall which. "There's no program on earth without a bug." <- Explaining that environmentissues can always let a program misbehave.

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