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Project disasters

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  • C Offline
    C Offline
    Christopher Duncan
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

    • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
    • Scope creep
    • Unstable software (poor quality)
    • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
    • The never ending / never delivered project
    • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
    • Maintenance nightmares
    • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

    Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

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    • C Christopher Duncan

      There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

      • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
      • Scope creep
      • Unstable software (poor quality)
      • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
      • The never ending / never delivered project
      • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
      • Maintenance nightmares
      • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

      Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      We were going to have a meeting about scope creep this week but it was cancelled because a new customer turns up at short notice... Bet there is scope creep on their project X| Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D

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      • C Christopher Duncan

        There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

        • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
        • Scope creep
        • Unstable software (poor quality)
        • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
        • The never ending / never delivered project
        • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
        • Maintenance nightmares
        • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

        Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

        J Offline
        J Offline
        John Fisher
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        How about refusal to design the software until the programmer comes up with something for them to look at first? (i.e. "Write it, then we'll tell you to change everything.") John

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        • C Christopher Duncan

          There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

          • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
          • Scope creep
          • Unstable software (poor quality)
          • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
          • The never ending / never delivered project
          • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
          • Maintenance nightmares
          • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

          Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

          T Offline
          T Offline
          Todd Smith
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Shipped to early Todd Smith

          C 1 Reply Last reply
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          • J John Fisher

            How about refusal to design the software until the programmer comes up with something for them to look at first? (i.e. "Write it, then we'll tell you to change everything.") John

            D Offline
            D Offline
            David Wulff
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            :eek:


            David Wulff

            "Without hopes and dreams we're directionless" - Anna

            C 1 Reply Last reply
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            • C Christopher Duncan

              There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

              • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
              • Scope creep
              • Unstable software (poor quality)
              • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
              • The never ending / never delivered project
              • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
              • Maintenance nightmares
              • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

              Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

              S Offline
              S Offline
              Shaun Wilde
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              you really should read 'the mythical man month' and 'death march' and that list you will realise will just grow and grow...

              Technically speaking the dictionary would define Visual Basic users as programmers.
              But here again, a very generalized, liberal definition is being employed and it's wrong
              - just plain wrong - Tom Archer 5/12/02

              P 1 Reply Last reply
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              • C Christopher Duncan

                There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

                • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
                • Scope creep
                • Unstable software (poor quality)
                • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
                • The never ending / never delivered project
                • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
                • Maintenance nightmares
                • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

                Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                R Offline
                R Offline
                Roger Wright
                wrote on last edited by
                #7
                • Updating software that should be scrapped
                • Vaporware dependencies
                • Reorganization
                • Delayed Requirements w/out schedule relief
                • Unmentioned Marketing promises to the customer

                Just a few... "Please don't put cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light" - Sign in a Bullhead City, AZ Restroom

                V C P 3 Replies Last reply
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                • C Christopher Duncan

                  There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

                  • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
                  • Scope creep
                  • Unstable software (poor quality)
                  • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
                  • The never ending / never delivered project
                  • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
                  • Maintenance nightmares
                  • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

                  Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                  H Offline
                  H Offline
                  Hans Dietrich
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Ah! The Marketeers song: It's just what I asked for, but not what I want.

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • J John Fisher

                    How about refusal to design the software until the programmer comes up with something for them to look at first? (i.e. "Write it, then we'll tell you to change everything.") John

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    Stuart Dootson
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Oh yeah, experienced that one - it's the refusal of customers to think about requirements - 'design your software and then we'll tell you why it's wrong'!!! Stuart Dootson 'Java, Basic, who cares - it's all a bunch of tree-hugging hippy cr*p'

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                    • R Roger Wright
                      • Updating software that should be scrapped
                      • Vaporware dependencies
                      • Reorganization
                      • Delayed Requirements w/out schedule relief
                      • Unmentioned Marketing promises to the customer

                      Just a few... "Please don't put cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light" - Sign in a Bullhead City, AZ Restroom

                      V Offline
                      V Offline
                      Vivek Rajan
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Roger Wright wrote: Vaporware dependencies :confused: ?? Top of my list would be : 1. Ir(?)reproducible build 2. Undocumented test cases 3. Complete dependence on one person

                      R 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • S Stuart Dootson

                        Oh yeah, experienced that one - it's the refusal of customers to think about requirements - 'design your software and then we'll tell you why it's wrong'!!! Stuart Dootson 'Java, Basic, who cares - it's all a bunch of tree-hugging hippy cr*p'

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                        T Offline
                        Tim Ranker
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        ...and then the customer wonder's why they are over budget.

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • V Vivek Rajan

                          Roger Wright wrote: Vaporware dependencies :confused: ?? Top of my list would be : 1. Ir(?)reproducible build 2. Undocumented test cases 3. Complete dependence on one person

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Roger Wright
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          Vaporware => any product which is sold/hyped before actually being created. Clueless managers commonly require the use of such products by their design teams because the donuts and alcohol flow freely at Marketing Events designed to presell them. The Motorola 68000 was one such product (I believe the term first came into usage when it was announced), as the Wescon where it was announced seemed to be completely dominated by it; data sheets were handed out, contracts signed, and products using it were designed two years before actual hardware was available. I also recall a language - it may have been Java, as all I remember of it was that it started with a J - that US Navy contracts required to be used for all firmware development. The contracts also specified that all coding had to use a fully DoD-qualified compiler. No such compiler existed, nor was ever qualified during the life of the contracts we worked on. "Please don't put cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light" - Sign in a Bullhead City, AZ Restroom

                          G 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • R Roger Wright
                            • Updating software that should be scrapped
                            • Vaporware dependencies
                            • Reorganization
                            • Delayed Requirements w/out schedule relief
                            • Unmentioned Marketing promises to the customer

                            Just a few... "Please don't put cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light" - Sign in a Bullhead City, AZ Restroom

                            C Offline
                            C Offline
                            Christopher Duncan
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Roger Wright wrote: Vaporware How could I have possibly forgotten that one? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • D David Wulff

                              :eek:


                              David Wulff

                              "Without hopes and dreams we're directionless" - Anna

                              C Offline
                              C Offline
                              Christopher Duncan
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              Don't sit there trying to look innocent, Mr. Wulff. We know you have a day gig now... Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • T Todd Smith

                                Shipped to early Todd Smith

                                C Offline
                                C Offline
                                Christopher Duncan
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                Todd Smith wrote: Shipped to early You expect us to believe that one? :-D Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • C Christopher Duncan

                                  There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

                                  • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
                                  • Scope creep
                                  • Unstable software (poor quality)
                                  • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
                                  • The never ending / never delivered project
                                  • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
                                  • Maintenance nightmares
                                  • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

                                  Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                  M Offline
                                  M Offline
                                  Marc Clifton
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  My two contributions: The software was obsolete by the time it was delivered The 5% exception was the 95% rule by the time the software was delivered Marc Help! I'm an AI running around in someone's f*cked up universe simulator.
                                  Sensitivity and ethnic diversity means celebrating difference, not hiding from it. - Christian Graus
                                  Every line of code is a liability - Taka Muraoka
                                  Microsoft deliberately adds arbitrary layers of complexity to make it difficult to deliver Windows features on non-Windows platforms--Microsoft's "Halloween files"

                                  C R 2 Replies Last reply
                                  0
                                  • M Marc Clifton

                                    My two contributions: The software was obsolete by the time it was delivered The 5% exception was the 95% rule by the time the software was delivered Marc Help! I'm an AI running around in someone's f*cked up universe simulator.
                                    Sensitivity and ethnic diversity means celebrating difference, not hiding from it. - Christian Graus
                                    Every line of code is a liability - Taka Muraoka
                                    Microsoft deliberately adds arbitrary layers of complexity to make it difficult to deliver Windows features on non-Windows platforms--Microsoft's "Halloween files"

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    Christopher Duncan
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    Marc Clifton wrote: The software was obsolete by the time it was delivered Another classic! Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • M Marc Clifton

                                      My two contributions: The software was obsolete by the time it was delivered The 5% exception was the 95% rule by the time the software was delivered Marc Help! I'm an AI running around in someone's f*cked up universe simulator.
                                      Sensitivity and ethnic diversity means celebrating difference, not hiding from it. - Christian Graus
                                      Every line of code is a liability - Taka Muraoka
                                      Microsoft deliberately adds arbitrary layers of complexity to make it difficult to deliver Windows features on non-Windows platforms--Microsoft's "Halloween files"

                                      R Offline
                                      R Offline
                                      Roger Wright
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Marc Clifton wrote: The software was obsolete by the time it was delivered LOL!!! ATLAS and Ada come to mind... DOD Directive 3405.1 - Programming Languages[^] "Please don't put cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light" - Sign in a Bullhead City, AZ Restroom

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • C Christopher Duncan

                                        There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

                                        • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
                                        • Scope creep
                                        • Unstable software (poor quality)
                                        • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
                                        • The never ending / never delivered project
                                        • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
                                        • Maintenance nightmares
                                        • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

                                        Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                        S Offline
                                        S Offline
                                        Stephane Rodriguez
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        - internal wars I formerly worked in a big company where mid managers were only trying to kill other's product line. In the end, out of the two product lines, one of the entire product line fell. Sadly, all managers remained in place, while "real" employees were sacked. VP dismissed the product development objectives as "well planned, badly executed". X| - internal marketing To motivate people to work on unexciting projects, managers put internal marketing in place. As anyone figures out, this only works in companies making a lot of money every quarter. In other words, product plans that are only intended to make us build a software which is not aimed to be sold, while at the same time maintaining (service packs) the existing software, really sold. Of course, only VPs know the real situation (unless they have a network share where anyone can read their plans...). X| - milestones passed "with restrictions". In fact the milestone objectives are not met but, to make sure PMs and managers get their bonus, the milestones are flagged as "passed with restrictions". The restrictions can be as impressive as "half the features are not there". The missing features or missing implementation are not planned in next milestone and simply expected to be implemented throughout next milestone, in addition to the next objectives. X| - employee performance management As soon as the performance plans were "implemented" in the compny, the direct manager was the only person giving a rate telling if your quarter objectives were met or not. Unfortunately, this strongly encouraged faked fellowship between employees and their managers in such a way that the only way to get a great rate was to booze with that person on friday evenings. X|

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                                        • C Christopher Duncan

                                          There's not many programmers doing this for a living who haven't run into their share of nightmare experiences. Almost none of them have to do with our skills as programmers, but rather come as the result of poor management or just plain Stupid Decisions. Here's my current list of project disasters:

                                          • Blown or unrealistic deadlines
                                          • Scope creep
                                          • Unstable software (poor quality)
                                          • Clumsy software (poor design or programmers constrained by management)
                                          • The never ending / never delivered project
                                          • Arbitrarily cancelled projects
                                          • Maintenance nightmares
                                          • Crisis management – changing directions every 5 minutes

                                          Am I missing any? Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                          S Offline
                                          S Offline
                                          Stephane Rodriguez
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          This thread looks to me a bit outdated given the current job climate in the software industry. For me, it's from now on much like "take the paycheck, protect the job", rather than "work in exciting new projects". Because of this, I am half way from starting courses to become a "lawyer". I am still thinking about other areas, the main idea is to be of use for the local community out there. The fact is, as I work in a company that builds and sells BI (business intelligence) performance tools, I drastically changed my mind since the software was put in place internally, i.e. used in our development cycles. I think so much that : - BI performance tools allow automation, which is another (politically correct) word for head reduction X| - BI performance tools are manipulation tools. They allow managers to build "performance reports" which are faking the truth. It's easy to draw charts which purposedly calculate faked trends, just to make sure the managers deliver the message they want. Sadly BI performance tools are marketed as "tools that make easy the extraction of data from database". It's a true lie, if any. X| - BI performance tools help companies build reports out of their databases. The truth is that, for instance in my company, the database is the bug database and, since QA people are expected to add 10 bugs / day / person, regardless how the product is far or near RTM, the trends which are built from the numbers are simply fake. Charts are fake. Manager decisions, based on chart trends, are faked, purposedly. We technical people are all fucked. SO much for BI tools... X| Next time you hear your company is using BI tools, beware...:wtf:

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