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Corona jokes

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  • L Lost User

    Member 7989122 wrote:

    it should be between 75 and 80%

    Stroh rum, 80%. Sticky stuff though.

    Member 7989122 wrote:

    So it is not a bad idea to use alcohol/antibac to fight those other threats. But I wouldn't at all be surprised if we, half a year from now, say that "Alcohol/antibac had no real effect on the Corona itself.

    I would be. Similar to news that Corona can survive on silver.

    Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^] "If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.

    J Offline
    J Offline
    Jorgen Andersson
    wrote on last edited by
    #33

    Silver is poisonous to many bacteria, but I don't think viruses care at all.

    Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello

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    • K kalberts

      How acceptable are Corona jokes? Which joke is perfectly OK, and where do you cross the line? What would be the equivalent of muttering "I worry about the bomb in my suitcase" aboard an airplane? - something that you just don't do? Is is OK to answer all telephone calls with an initial couch? Can you clear your throat on subway, making a muttered comment about "it is just in my chest"? Can you cough and remind people around you not to get any closer than one meter, as recommended by health authorities? Can you make a drawing of a religious person, usually depicted with a glorie around his head, but now that glorie has grown this bush-like mushrooms? Can you joke about people in panic from corona spreading on the Internet? Can you make generic jokes like "Good thing we will have less ...... when it is over! (Fill in your favorite population group)"? Can you make non-generic, more specific jokes like that? Can you draw Bob (that's his name, isn't it?) with a corona crown on his head? (today it is a hat with flowers) Can you make parodies on statements made by political leaders? Can you draw an old lady laying in a coffin with a corona crown on her head? Is there any corona joke that would be really bad taste?

      W Offline
      W Offline
      Wastedtalent
      wrote on last edited by
      #34

      Member 7989122 wrote:

      Is is OK to answer all telephone calls with an initial couch?

      Sofa now I'd suggest just sitting on them.

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      • J Jorgen Andersson

        Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. When he finishes his drink, the bartender asks him if he would like another. Descartes replies, I think not, and disappears.

        Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello

        Sander RosselS Offline
        Sander RosselS Offline
        Sander Rossel
        wrote on last edited by
        #35

        Not that one, this one: A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse if it's an alcoholic considering all the bars he frequents, to which the horse replies "I think not!" POOF! The horse disappears. This is the point in time when all the philosophy students in the audience begin to giggle, as they are familiar with the philosophical proposition of Cogito ergo sum, or I think, therefore, I am. But to explain the concept aforehand would be putting Descartes before the horse.

        Best, Sander sanderrossel.com Migrating Applications to the Cloud with Azure arrgh.js - Bringing LINQ to JavaScript Object-Oriented Programming in C# Succinctly

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        • K kalberts

          How acceptable are Corona jokes? Which joke is perfectly OK, and where do you cross the line? What would be the equivalent of muttering "I worry about the bomb in my suitcase" aboard an airplane? - something that you just don't do? Is is OK to answer all telephone calls with an initial couch? Can you clear your throat on subway, making a muttered comment about "it is just in my chest"? Can you cough and remind people around you not to get any closer than one meter, as recommended by health authorities? Can you make a drawing of a religious person, usually depicted with a glorie around his head, but now that glorie has grown this bush-like mushrooms? Can you joke about people in panic from corona spreading on the Internet? Can you make generic jokes like "Good thing we will have less ...... when it is over! (Fill in your favorite population group)"? Can you make non-generic, more specific jokes like that? Can you draw Bob (that's his name, isn't it?) with a corona crown on his head? (today it is a hat with flowers) Can you make parodies on statements made by political leaders? Can you draw an old lady laying in a coffin with a corona crown on her head? Is there any corona joke that would be really bad taste?

          Sander RosselS Offline
          Sander RosselS Offline
          Sander Rossel
          wrote on last edited by
          #36

          Personally, I'm not easily shocked, so be my guest and joke all you want :D Whether I find it funny is something else entirely. For example,

          Member 7989122 wrote:

          Can you clear your throat on subway, making a muttered comment about "it is just in my chest"?

          Not funny.

          Member 7989122 wrote:

          Can you make parodies on statements made by political leaders?

          I think no one does that better than politicians themselves.

          Member 7989122 wrote:

          Can you make generic jokes like "Good thing we will have less ...... when it is over! (Fill in your favorite population group)"?

          "People" would be my least favorite population group :D Now here's a funny one: Where's Wally? - The corona virus edition[^] :laugh:

          Best, Sander sanderrossel.com Migrating Applications to the Cloud with Azure arrgh.js - Bringing LINQ to JavaScript Object-Oriented Programming in C# Succinctly

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          • K kalberts

            So you say there is an absolute, undisputable, single answer. There is no graded scale. Then there are only two alternatives: No joking whatsoever is acceptable. Or anything is acceptable. I suspect that you go for the first alternative. I am not sure if the Norwegian term "galgenhumor" can be directly translated to English: "Gallows humour". It refers to the kind of jokes a delinquent makes before he is killed. Or in a more modern setting: Making jokes on in an extremely bleak situation, about that situation, to make people laugh at at to keep spirits up. A special kind of black humour, the one that is not just black, but refers to your own current situation. I dare to claim that this sort or humour has saved a few lives: When people can laugh at their own situation, they may gain the strength to survive it. I accept that you think it is better to keep the situation as bleak as possible, smile at nothing, laugh at noting that is related to it. So you are free to ignore all such things. Consider my request to be directed at those who think humour can be an essential element in handling hardships. It is not evident how far the joking might go, and it certainly varies from one society to another, one setting to another. It is not at all obvious that a joke crossing the border line in one specific society in one specific setting could not cause a releaving laugh and give a mental push to people ina completely different setting in a completely different society.

            M Offline
            M Offline
            Mark_Wallace
            wrote on last edited by
            #37

            Member 7989122 wrote:

            There is no graded scale. Then there are only two alternatives: No joking whatsoever is acceptable. Or anything is acceptable.

            Nonsense. Joking about people who have died is unacceptable, because their families are in mourning. Joking about the reason the virus spreads through certain communities is unacceptable, because it will almost certainly be racist. OTOH, jokes like Pompey3's saying he now farts to hide a cough is perfectly acceptable. You should think two things, before telling a joke about the coronavirus: 0: Will I be adding to anyone's pain, by saying this? 1: Will saying this make me look like a completely heartless and/or self-centred dick? In fact, don't restrict those rules just to jokes about the coronavirus.  Apply them every time you're thinking of opening your mouth to speak -- unless, of course, you really are a heartless/self-centred/racist dick, in which case it's best if everyone knows about it.

            I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

            D 1 Reply Last reply
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            • J Jorgen Andersson

              Silver is poisonous to many bacteria, but I don't think viruses care at all.

              Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello

              L Offline
              L Offline
              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #38

              It is also hard to drink :)

              Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^] "If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • K kalberts

                Sorry, I'm not getting it.

                D Offline
                D Offline
                dandy72
                wrote on last edited by
                #39

                Then let me try to explain it: It simply means if one has such poor judgment so as not to be able to make the determination for oneself, then they might as well not take any chance. Let others make the jokes. There's plenty that are perfectly acceptable. I'm very much all for gallows humor, as you put it (and yes, it does translate).

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                • M Mark_Wallace

                  Member 7989122 wrote:

                  There is no graded scale. Then there are only two alternatives: No joking whatsoever is acceptable. Or anything is acceptable.

                  Nonsense. Joking about people who have died is unacceptable, because their families are in mourning. Joking about the reason the virus spreads through certain communities is unacceptable, because it will almost certainly be racist. OTOH, jokes like Pompey3's saying he now farts to hide a cough is perfectly acceptable. You should think two things, before telling a joke about the coronavirus: 0: Will I be adding to anyone's pain, by saying this? 1: Will saying this make me look like a completely heartless and/or self-centred dick? In fact, don't restrict those rules just to jokes about the coronavirus.  Apply them every time you're thinking of opening your mouth to speak -- unless, of course, you really are a heartless/self-centred/racist dick, in which case it's best if everyone knows about it.

                  I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                  D Offline
                  D Offline
                  dandy72
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #40

                  The length alone of your post pretty much makes my point. :-)

                  M 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • J Johnny J

                    "Free the whales"? :confused:

                    Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
                    Anonymous
                    -----
                    The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
                    Winston Churchill, 1944
                    -----
                    Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
                    Mark Twain

                    K Offline
                    K Offline
                    kalberts
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #41

                    I was more thinking of the Norse verb "á fokka", which means to make rythmical thrusts.

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                    • D dandy72

                      The length alone of your post pretty much makes my point. :-)

                      M Offline
                      M Offline
                      Mark_Wallace
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #42

                      dandy72 wrote:

                      The length alone of your post pretty much makes my point.

                      Your post was around 250 words, mine about half that. And, since it succinctly (i.e. without using twice as many words than were necessary) and pointedly disagrees with your point, I don't see how you can possibly say that it makes your point.

                      I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                      D 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • M Mark_Wallace

                        dandy72 wrote:

                        The length alone of your post pretty much makes my point.

                        Your post was around 250 words, mine about half that. And, since it succinctly (i.e. without using twice as many words than were necessary) and pointedly disagrees with your point, I don't see how you can possibly say that it makes your point.

                        I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                        D Offline
                        D Offline
                        dandy72
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #43

                        You're either referring to another post, or mistaking me with someone else. The (original) message I was referring to simply said:

                        Quote:

                        If you have to have it explained to you, then you probably should not attempt it. This golden rule applies to more things in life than just humor.

                        M 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • D dandy72

                          You're either referring to another post, or mistaking me with someone else. The (original) message I was referring to simply said:

                          Quote:

                          If you have to have it explained to you, then you probably should not attempt it. This golden rule applies to more things in life than just humor.

                          M Offline
                          M Offline
                          Mark_Wallace
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #44

                          dandy72 wrote:

                          You're either referring to another post, or mistaking me with someone else.

                          Hmm, yes, now that I look at the threads, a mistake as you describe has been made. But not by me ;P

                          I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                          D 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • M Mark_Wallace

                            dandy72 wrote:

                            You're either referring to another post, or mistaking me with someone else.

                            Hmm, yes, now that I look at the threads, a mistake as you describe has been made. But not by me ;P

                            I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                            D Offline
                            D Offline
                            dandy72
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #45

                            :-D

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