Handy Hints For Spies
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I've just finished Homeland S5, (yes, I know I'm late to the party), and seem to have spent quite a lot of time, shouting at the TV, telling them not to be so stupid. They don't even seem to be able to get the basics of spying right! On the assumption that the CIA are monitoring everything, I thought I'd post a couple of 'handy hints' for them on The Lounge: 1. Rule number 1 of being a hostage, (surely?). If one of your captors decides he wants to help you: Don't send him off to find the poisonous gas canister - and not come back. Do get him to set you free. Simple! 2. The dead baddy's phone. If the dead baddy, (conveniently?), hasn't protected his phone with a Pin No.: Don't just dial the last number used; hang up, (thinking: "no idea who that is!"); and forget all about it. Do, use some very clever 'track and trace system', (that only the CIA have), to identify who the number belongs to - and their location, down to the nearest square metre. I'm pretty sure following basic rules like this is going to save them lots of time - and, maybe, cut the length of a season down to 6 episodes. P.S. Has anyone ever wondered how Jack Bauer, (yes I know it's a different program), always manages to have it all sorted in exactly 24 hours? Surely there must have been times when he cracked it in 21 hours - and the last three episodes are him in bed sleeping? Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
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I've just finished Homeland S5, (yes, I know I'm late to the party), and seem to have spent quite a lot of time, shouting at the TV, telling them not to be so stupid. They don't even seem to be able to get the basics of spying right! On the assumption that the CIA are monitoring everything, I thought I'd post a couple of 'handy hints' for them on The Lounge: 1. Rule number 1 of being a hostage, (surely?). If one of your captors decides he wants to help you: Don't send him off to find the poisonous gas canister - and not come back. Do get him to set you free. Simple! 2. The dead baddy's phone. If the dead baddy, (conveniently?), hasn't protected his phone with a Pin No.: Don't just dial the last number used; hang up, (thinking: "no idea who that is!"); and forget all about it. Do, use some very clever 'track and trace system', (that only the CIA have), to identify who the number belongs to - and their location, down to the nearest square metre. I'm pretty sure following basic rules like this is going to save them lots of time - and, maybe, cut the length of a season down to 6 episodes. P.S. Has anyone ever wondered how Jack Bauer, (yes I know it's a different program), always manages to have it all sorted in exactly 24 hours? Surely there must have been times when he cracked it in 21 hours - and the last three episodes are him in bed sleeping? Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
5teveH wrote:
Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
Nah ... after 23 hours and 59 minutes they send in Chuck Norris to rescue him.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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I've just finished Homeland S5, (yes, I know I'm late to the party), and seem to have spent quite a lot of time, shouting at the TV, telling them not to be so stupid. They don't even seem to be able to get the basics of spying right! On the assumption that the CIA are monitoring everything, I thought I'd post a couple of 'handy hints' for them on The Lounge: 1. Rule number 1 of being a hostage, (surely?). If one of your captors decides he wants to help you: Don't send him off to find the poisonous gas canister - and not come back. Do get him to set you free. Simple! 2. The dead baddy's phone. If the dead baddy, (conveniently?), hasn't protected his phone with a Pin No.: Don't just dial the last number used; hang up, (thinking: "no idea who that is!"); and forget all about it. Do, use some very clever 'track and trace system', (that only the CIA have), to identify who the number belongs to - and their location, down to the nearest square metre. I'm pretty sure following basic rules like this is going to save them lots of time - and, maybe, cut the length of a season down to 6 episodes. P.S. Has anyone ever wondered how Jack Bauer, (yes I know it's a different program), always manages to have it all sorted in exactly 24 hours? Surely there must have been times when he cracked it in 21 hours - and the last three episodes are him in bed sleeping? Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
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Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
His brother, Frans Bauer will come to the rescue: Frans Bauer - Heb je even voor mij - YouTube[^]
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5teveH wrote:
Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
Nah ... after 23 hours and 59 minutes they send in Chuck Norris to rescue him.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Quote:
Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
His brother, Frans Bauer will come to the rescue: Frans Bauer - Heb je even voor mij - YouTube[^]
-
I've just finished Homeland S5, (yes, I know I'm late to the party), and seem to have spent quite a lot of time, shouting at the TV, telling them not to be so stupid. They don't even seem to be able to get the basics of spying right! On the assumption that the CIA are monitoring everything, I thought I'd post a couple of 'handy hints' for them on The Lounge: 1. Rule number 1 of being a hostage, (surely?). If one of your captors decides he wants to help you: Don't send him off to find the poisonous gas canister - and not come back. Do get him to set you free. Simple! 2. The dead baddy's phone. If the dead baddy, (conveniently?), hasn't protected his phone with a Pin No.: Don't just dial the last number used; hang up, (thinking: "no idea who that is!"); and forget all about it. Do, use some very clever 'track and trace system', (that only the CIA have), to identify who the number belongs to - and their location, down to the nearest square metre. I'm pretty sure following basic rules like this is going to save them lots of time - and, maybe, cut the length of a season down to 6 episodes. P.S. Has anyone ever wondered how Jack Bauer, (yes I know it's a different program), always manages to have it all sorted in exactly 24 hours? Surely there must have been times when he cracked it in 21 hours - and the last three episodes are him in bed sleeping? Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
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I've just finished Homeland S5, (yes, I know I'm late to the party), and seem to have spent quite a lot of time, shouting at the TV, telling them not to be so stupid. They don't even seem to be able to get the basics of spying right! On the assumption that the CIA are monitoring everything, I thought I'd post a couple of 'handy hints' for them on The Lounge: 1. Rule number 1 of being a hostage, (surely?). If one of your captors decides he wants to help you: Don't send him off to find the poisonous gas canister - and not come back. Do get him to set you free. Simple! 2. The dead baddy's phone. If the dead baddy, (conveniently?), hasn't protected his phone with a Pin No.: Don't just dial the last number used; hang up, (thinking: "no idea who that is!"); and forget all about it. Do, use some very clever 'track and trace system', (that only the CIA have), to identify who the number belongs to - and their location, down to the nearest square metre. I'm pretty sure following basic rules like this is going to save them lots of time - and, maybe, cut the length of a season down to 6 episodes. P.S. Has anyone ever wondered how Jack Bauer, (yes I know it's a different program), always manages to have it all sorted in exactly 24 hours? Surely there must have been times when he cracked it in 21 hours - and the last three episodes are him in bed sleeping? Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
5teveH wrote:
P.S. Has anyone ever wondered how Jack Bauer, (yes I know it's a different program), always manages to have it all sorted in exactly 24 hours? Surely there must have been times when he cracked it in 21 hours - and the last three episodes are him in bed sleeping? Or, after 24 hours, he's still tied up in the terrorists garage with Gaffa tape over his mouth?
1. Jack Bauer seems to lose phones every time he turns around, yet when someone hands him a phone, his contact list, including his personal contacts, always seems to be present. 2. If he does manage to hold on to the phone for a few hours, he's always using it, and using power hungry apps like GPS. So how is it that those phones managed to stay charged? 3. It never occurs to the bad guys, all of whom know who he is, to blow Jack's brains out before they try and take over the world? 4. Jack would be, in real life, the world's worst operator. How does anyone he works for not know this?
