Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • World
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Code Project
  1. Home
  2. Other Discussions
  3. The Back Room
  4. Warning: Contains extreme Soapbox material. May also lead to breathing problems due to laughter...

Warning: Contains extreme Soapbox material. May also lead to breathing problems due to laughter...

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Back Room
helpquestionannouncement
13 Posts 9 Posters 0 Views 1 Watching
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • M Offline
    M Offline
    Megan Forbes
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    VAGINITIS QUERIES IN THE FEMINA MAGAZINE .... These letters came in response to an advert in a South African woman's magazine called Femina. All of the extracts are from people whose first (or second) language is NOT English: Back in 1985, SA Femina Magazine ran an advertisement for Nelex, a medicine for the treatment of a vaginal infection known as Vaginitis. The ad prompted hundreds of letters from sufferers countrywide, most of them from women who were clearly unsure as to what exactly was wrong with them. The letters were collected by the advertising agency that created the Femina ad who swear that every single one of them is genuine. Herewith extracts from some of the most hilarious: 1. My interesting language is English, so you better send me an English copy of your vaginitis. 2. Please send me the following symptoms: itching, discharge, unpleasant smell. I am one of those with a virginal problem. I will be very grateful if my disease were acceptable. 3. Dear sirs, greetings as patient to you, but I have not got enough time to express my sickness over this paper. I want to come by myself to confess my sickness to you after I use this Nelex. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. 4. How can I get vaginal infection? Most chemists cannot help. 5. Is vaginitis normal, or does it occur by mistakes like having sex? My husband is not happy with the behaviour of my vagina at bedtime. 6. Please send me more information about these vaginal erections. My symptoms are some of the ones you didn't mention, so please send me another medicine. Every boyfriend left me and made another girl pregnant, so maybe you can help me. With modern life of anonymous infection, I have found your vaginal infection very handy and unavoidable. I tried Dettol, Omo (a washing powder) and also pure brandy. Allin vain. My problem is itching, burning pain after intercourse when the weather is cold or foggy. 7. I am a young lady of 1963. Will you please send me more news about my virginia pains during intercourse, even when I'm not having intercourse at. I use to have sex eight to ten times a day. Now I am very dry. I went to the hospital and they told me I have too much sex. Maybe I should move to Durban for the humidity. 8. I am a girl of 21 years of edge. Can you help me with Virginial infractions? Last night the virginial infections suddenly attacked me. What do you want me to do? 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husba

    N A T J J 5 Replies Last reply
    0
    • M Megan Forbes

      VAGINITIS QUERIES IN THE FEMINA MAGAZINE .... These letters came in response to an advert in a South African woman's magazine called Femina. All of the extracts are from people whose first (or second) language is NOT English: Back in 1985, SA Femina Magazine ran an advertisement for Nelex, a medicine for the treatment of a vaginal infection known as Vaginitis. The ad prompted hundreds of letters from sufferers countrywide, most of them from women who were clearly unsure as to what exactly was wrong with them. The letters were collected by the advertising agency that created the Femina ad who swear that every single one of them is genuine. Herewith extracts from some of the most hilarious: 1. My interesting language is English, so you better send me an English copy of your vaginitis. 2. Please send me the following symptoms: itching, discharge, unpleasant smell. I am one of those with a virginal problem. I will be very grateful if my disease were acceptable. 3. Dear sirs, greetings as patient to you, but I have not got enough time to express my sickness over this paper. I want to come by myself to confess my sickness to you after I use this Nelex. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. 4. How can I get vaginal infection? Most chemists cannot help. 5. Is vaginitis normal, or does it occur by mistakes like having sex? My husband is not happy with the behaviour of my vagina at bedtime. 6. Please send me more information about these vaginal erections. My symptoms are some of the ones you didn't mention, so please send me another medicine. Every boyfriend left me and made another girl pregnant, so maybe you can help me. With modern life of anonymous infection, I have found your vaginal infection very handy and unavoidable. I tried Dettol, Omo (a washing powder) and also pure brandy. Allin vain. My problem is itching, burning pain after intercourse when the weather is cold or foggy. 7. I am a young lady of 1963. Will you please send me more news about my virginia pains during intercourse, even when I'm not having intercourse at. I use to have sex eight to ten times a day. Now I am very dry. I went to the hospital and they told me I have too much sex. Maybe I should move to Durban for the humidity. 8. I am a girl of 21 years of edge. Can you help me with Virginial infractions? Last night the virginial infections suddenly attacked me. What do you want me to do? 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husba

      N Offline
      N Offline
      Nick Seng
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      10. I really want a baby, but I don't want to be pregnant. The first time noticed vaginal infection was in your advert. My vargin is beginning to irritate me. I scream at it sometimes but it doesn't help. Sometimes my anus produces an unpleasant smell. Please send my letter back so I can remember what I have written. I cannot tell my mother about it: she has no vagina. The last time I looked for my vaginitis I could not find it anywhere. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh: *dies laughing*


      "if you vote me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine" - Michael P. Butler. Support Bone

      M 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • N Nick Seng

        10. I really want a baby, but I don't want to be pregnant. The first time noticed vaginal infection was in your advert. My vargin is beginning to irritate me. I scream at it sometimes but it doesn't help. Sometimes my anus produces an unpleasant smell. Please send my letter back so I can remember what I have written. I cannot tell my mother about it: she has no vagina. The last time I looked for my vaginitis I could not find it anywhere. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh: *dies laughing*


        "if you vote me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine" - Michael P. Butler. Support Bone

        M Offline
        M Offline
        Megan Forbes
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Nick Seng wrote: *dies laughing* It's killing me - I can't share the joke with anyone I work with as they are far too boring and would probably be uptight about it... :laugh: *collapses* :laugh: :laugh: How about: "...please reply as soon as it is convenient for me. " and "I am 20 years old and will be 21 sooner than expected. I cannot tell my mother about it: she has no vagina...."


        Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
        Meg's World - Blog Photography - The product of my passion

        C 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • M Megan Forbes

          VAGINITIS QUERIES IN THE FEMINA MAGAZINE .... These letters came in response to an advert in a South African woman's magazine called Femina. All of the extracts are from people whose first (or second) language is NOT English: Back in 1985, SA Femina Magazine ran an advertisement for Nelex, a medicine for the treatment of a vaginal infection known as Vaginitis. The ad prompted hundreds of letters from sufferers countrywide, most of them from women who were clearly unsure as to what exactly was wrong with them. The letters were collected by the advertising agency that created the Femina ad who swear that every single one of them is genuine. Herewith extracts from some of the most hilarious: 1. My interesting language is English, so you better send me an English copy of your vaginitis. 2. Please send me the following symptoms: itching, discharge, unpleasant smell. I am one of those with a virginal problem. I will be very grateful if my disease were acceptable. 3. Dear sirs, greetings as patient to you, but I have not got enough time to express my sickness over this paper. I want to come by myself to confess my sickness to you after I use this Nelex. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. 4. How can I get vaginal infection? Most chemists cannot help. 5. Is vaginitis normal, or does it occur by mistakes like having sex? My husband is not happy with the behaviour of my vagina at bedtime. 6. Please send me more information about these vaginal erections. My symptoms are some of the ones you didn't mention, so please send me another medicine. Every boyfriend left me and made another girl pregnant, so maybe you can help me. With modern life of anonymous infection, I have found your vaginal infection very handy and unavoidable. I tried Dettol, Omo (a washing powder) and also pure brandy. Allin vain. My problem is itching, burning pain after intercourse when the weather is cold or foggy. 7. I am a young lady of 1963. Will you please send me more news about my virginia pains during intercourse, even when I'm not having intercourse at. I use to have sex eight to ten times a day. Now I am very dry. I went to the hospital and they told me I have too much sex. Maybe I should move to Durban for the humidity. 8. I am a girl of 21 years of edge. Can you help me with Virginial infractions? Last night the virginial infections suddenly attacked me. What do you want me to do? 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husba

          A Offline
          A Offline
          Aryo Handono
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Megan Forbes wrote: 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husband alone, but he says I am a bitch. I slept with many men. Can you close my virginia for me :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh: "Courage choose who will follow, Fate choose who will lead" - Lord Gunner, Septerra Core "Press any key to continue, where's the ANY key ?" - Homer Simpsons Drinking gives me amazing powers of insight. I can solve all the worlds problems when drunk, but can never remember the solutions in the morning. - Michael P Butler to Paul Watson on 12/08/03

          S 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • A Aryo Handono

            Megan Forbes wrote: 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husband alone, but he says I am a bitch. I slept with many men. Can you close my virginia for me :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh: "Courage choose who will follow, Fate choose who will lead" - Lord Gunner, Septerra Core "Press any key to continue, where's the ANY key ?" - Homer Simpsons Drinking gives me amazing powers of insight. I can solve all the worlds problems when drunk, but can never remember the solutions in the morning. - Michael P Butler to Paul Watson on 12/08/03

            S Offline
            S Offline
            Signal 9
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            That was very funny... nice post...:laugh:

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • M Megan Forbes

              VAGINITIS QUERIES IN THE FEMINA MAGAZINE .... These letters came in response to an advert in a South African woman's magazine called Femina. All of the extracts are from people whose first (or second) language is NOT English: Back in 1985, SA Femina Magazine ran an advertisement for Nelex, a medicine for the treatment of a vaginal infection known as Vaginitis. The ad prompted hundreds of letters from sufferers countrywide, most of them from women who were clearly unsure as to what exactly was wrong with them. The letters were collected by the advertising agency that created the Femina ad who swear that every single one of them is genuine. Herewith extracts from some of the most hilarious: 1. My interesting language is English, so you better send me an English copy of your vaginitis. 2. Please send me the following symptoms: itching, discharge, unpleasant smell. I am one of those with a virginal problem. I will be very grateful if my disease were acceptable. 3. Dear sirs, greetings as patient to you, but I have not got enough time to express my sickness over this paper. I want to come by myself to confess my sickness to you after I use this Nelex. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. 4. How can I get vaginal infection? Most chemists cannot help. 5. Is vaginitis normal, or does it occur by mistakes like having sex? My husband is not happy with the behaviour of my vagina at bedtime. 6. Please send me more information about these vaginal erections. My symptoms are some of the ones you didn't mention, so please send me another medicine. Every boyfriend left me and made another girl pregnant, so maybe you can help me. With modern life of anonymous infection, I have found your vaginal infection very handy and unavoidable. I tried Dettol, Omo (a washing powder) and also pure brandy. Allin vain. My problem is itching, burning pain after intercourse when the weather is cold or foggy. 7. I am a young lady of 1963. Will you please send me more news about my virginia pains during intercourse, even when I'm not having intercourse at. I use to have sex eight to ten times a day. Now I am very dry. I went to the hospital and they told me I have too much sex. Maybe I should move to Durban for the humidity. 8. I am a girl of 21 years of edge. Can you help me with Virginial infractions? Last night the virginial infections suddenly attacked me. What do you want me to do? 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husba

              T Offline
              T Offline
              Terry ONolley
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Some really funny stuff there! But I wonder if it is true or not. I mean, people whose language isn't english would be very unlikely to produce the comical spelling errors in your post (ie: "Virginia" instead of "Vagina"). I liked the line: "I am not an ignorant girl, but how can I be sure?" :)


              Have you answered an MTQ? Check out the stats!

              C 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • M Megan Forbes

                VAGINITIS QUERIES IN THE FEMINA MAGAZINE .... These letters came in response to an advert in a South African woman's magazine called Femina. All of the extracts are from people whose first (or second) language is NOT English: Back in 1985, SA Femina Magazine ran an advertisement for Nelex, a medicine for the treatment of a vaginal infection known as Vaginitis. The ad prompted hundreds of letters from sufferers countrywide, most of them from women who were clearly unsure as to what exactly was wrong with them. The letters were collected by the advertising agency that created the Femina ad who swear that every single one of them is genuine. Herewith extracts from some of the most hilarious: 1. My interesting language is English, so you better send me an English copy of your vaginitis. 2. Please send me the following symptoms: itching, discharge, unpleasant smell. I am one of those with a virginal problem. I will be very grateful if my disease were acceptable. 3. Dear sirs, greetings as patient to you, but I have not got enough time to express my sickness over this paper. I want to come by myself to confess my sickness to you after I use this Nelex. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. 4. How can I get vaginal infection? Most chemists cannot help. 5. Is vaginitis normal, or does it occur by mistakes like having sex? My husband is not happy with the behaviour of my vagina at bedtime. 6. Please send me more information about these vaginal erections. My symptoms are some of the ones you didn't mention, so please send me another medicine. Every boyfriend left me and made another girl pregnant, so maybe you can help me. With modern life of anonymous infection, I have found your vaginal infection very handy and unavoidable. I tried Dettol, Omo (a washing powder) and also pure brandy. Allin vain. My problem is itching, burning pain after intercourse when the weather is cold or foggy. 7. I am a young lady of 1963. Will you please send me more news about my virginia pains during intercourse, even when I'm not having intercourse at. I use to have sex eight to ten times a day. Now I am very dry. I went to the hospital and they told me I have too much sex. Maybe I should move to Durban for the humidity. 8. I am a girl of 21 years of edge. Can you help me with Virginial infractions? Last night the virginial infections suddenly attacked me. What do you want me to do? 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husba

                J Offline
                J Offline
                JoeSox
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                ROTFL! This is just too good:laugh: Later, JoeSox "That sounds exactly like the thinking of a machine to me." -- Morpheus, The Matrix Reloaded joeswammi.com ↔ humanaiproject.org ↔ joeswammi.com/sinfest

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • M Megan Forbes

                  Nick Seng wrote: *dies laughing* It's killing me - I can't share the joke with anyone I work with as they are far too boring and would probably be uptight about it... :laugh: *collapses* :laugh: :laugh: How about: "...please reply as soon as it is convenient for me. " and "I am 20 years old and will be 21 sooner than expected. I cannot tell my mother about it: she has no vagina...."


                  Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
                  Meg's World - Blog Photography - The product of my passion

                  C Offline
                  C Offline
                  Christian Graus
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Megan Forbes wrote: I can't share the joke with anyone I work with as they are far too boring and would probably be uptight about it All the more reason to send it on down, surely ? I'm sending it to everyone here... Christian I have drunk the cool-aid and found it wan and bitter. - Chris Maunder

                  M 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • T Terry ONolley

                    Some really funny stuff there! But I wonder if it is true or not. I mean, people whose language isn't english would be very unlikely to produce the comical spelling errors in your post (ie: "Virginia" instead of "Vagina"). I liked the line: "I am not an ignorant girl, but how can I be sure?" :)


                    Have you answered an MTQ? Check out the stats!

                    C Offline
                    C Offline
                    Christian Graus
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    I learned long ago that the likelyhood of these things being true is inversely proportional to how much you'd like them to be. However, I can't find it on any hoax sites ( I hope that searches are not logged where I work, I just googled 'africa vagina hoax' ). Christian I have drunk the cool-aid and found it wan and bitter. - Chris Maunder

                    T 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • C Christian Graus

                      I learned long ago that the likelyhood of these things being true is inversely proportional to how much you'd like them to be. However, I can't find it on any hoax sites ( I hope that searches are not logged where I work, I just googled 'africa vagina hoax' ). Christian I have drunk the cool-aid and found it wan and bitter. - Chris Maunder

                      T Offline
                      T Offline
                      Terry ONolley
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Christian Graus wrote: I hope that searches are not logged where I work, I just googled 'africa vagina hoax' Just listen in on your coworkers - if they start referring to you as that "dude that likes black transvestites" then you know you were logged!


                      Have you answered an MTQ? Check out the stats!

                      R 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • C Christian Graus

                        Megan Forbes wrote: I can't share the joke with anyone I work with as they are far too boring and would probably be uptight about it All the more reason to send it on down, surely ? I'm sending it to everyone here... Christian I have drunk the cool-aid and found it wan and bitter. - Chris Maunder

                        M Offline
                        M Offline
                        Megan Forbes
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        Christian Graus wrote: All the more reason to send it on down, surely ? I'm sending it to everyone here... I'm not ready to be fired yet... :~


                        Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
                        Meg's World - Blog Photography - The product of my passion

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • T Terry ONolley

                          Christian Graus wrote: I hope that searches are not logged where I work, I just googled 'africa vagina hoax' Just listen in on your coworkers - if they start referring to you as that "dude that likes black transvestites" then you know you were logged!


                          Have you answered an MTQ? Check out the stats!

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Roger Wright
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          :laugh::laugh::laugh: I surprised a few of my coworkers by showing them the logs that IIS keeps by default! Or was that proxy server... I forget, but it was hilarious to see their expressions when they found out just how much I knew about their activities (yeah, like I had time to read all that stuff). "Your village called -
                          They're missing their idiot."

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • M Megan Forbes

                            VAGINITIS QUERIES IN THE FEMINA MAGAZINE .... These letters came in response to an advert in a South African woman's magazine called Femina. All of the extracts are from people whose first (or second) language is NOT English: Back in 1985, SA Femina Magazine ran an advertisement for Nelex, a medicine for the treatment of a vaginal infection known as Vaginitis. The ad prompted hundreds of letters from sufferers countrywide, most of them from women who were clearly unsure as to what exactly was wrong with them. The letters were collected by the advertising agency that created the Femina ad who swear that every single one of them is genuine. Herewith extracts from some of the most hilarious: 1. My interesting language is English, so you better send me an English copy of your vaginitis. 2. Please send me the following symptoms: itching, discharge, unpleasant smell. I am one of those with a virginal problem. I will be very grateful if my disease were acceptable. 3. Dear sirs, greetings as patient to you, but I have not got enough time to express my sickness over this paper. I want to come by myself to confess my sickness to you after I use this Nelex. The trouble is my vaginitis and that I'm so ugly. 4. How can I get vaginal infection? Most chemists cannot help. 5. Is vaginitis normal, or does it occur by mistakes like having sex? My husband is not happy with the behaviour of my vagina at bedtime. 6. Please send me more information about these vaginal erections. My symptoms are some of the ones you didn't mention, so please send me another medicine. Every boyfriend left me and made another girl pregnant, so maybe you can help me. With modern life of anonymous infection, I have found your vaginal infection very handy and unavoidable. I tried Dettol, Omo (a washing powder) and also pure brandy. Allin vain. My problem is itching, burning pain after intercourse when the weather is cold or foggy. 7. I am a young lady of 1963. Will you please send me more news about my virginia pains during intercourse, even when I'm not having intercourse at. I use to have sex eight to ten times a day. Now I am very dry. I went to the hospital and they told me I have too much sex. Maybe I should move to Durban for the humidity. 8. I am a girl of 21 years of edge. Can you help me with Virginial infractions? Last night the virginial infections suddenly attacked me. What do you want me to do? 9. Please send me Nelex. I am so sick I will even pay for it. My virginia is wide open, but I only slept with my husba

                            J Offline
                            J Offline
                            jan larsen
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Amazing! :laugh: "After all it's just text at the end of the day. - Colin Davies "For example, when a VB programmer comes to my house, they may say 'does your pool need cleaning, sir ?' " - Christian Graus

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            Reply
                            • Reply as topic
                            Log in to reply
                            • Oldest to Newest
                            • Newest to Oldest
                            • Most Votes


                            • Login

                            • Don't have an account? Register

                            • Login or register to search.
                            • First post
                              Last post
                            0
                            • Categories
                            • Recent
                            • Tags
                            • Popular
                            • World
                            • Users
                            • Groups