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  3. How to get a *Job* an old idea !

How to get a *Job* an old idea !

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  • C Offline
    C Offline
    ColinDavies
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    The idea that there are CPians in the unemployment lines sucks, Big time. So here is a age old idea, for getting that job that you have always wanted. 1. Make a short list of Companies you would like to work for ! 2. Investigate those companies, find out what they are all about, where there markets are, what technology they use, And most importantly who really matters in that company. 3. Investigate who really matters in that company, finding out all sorts of info and especially social habits. 4. Employ an escort. ( " I know what you are thinking and you are wrong. " ) The escort must be neck twistingly attractive to your target who. 5. Be alongside your escort when he/she bumps into your target who. 6. If you have done your investigation correctly your target who will listen to your plight while never breaking eye contact with your escort. 7. Start your new dream job the following day. :-) Has anyone else got any ideas to help out fellow CPians looking for employment ? Regardz Colin J Davies

    Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

    I live in Bob's HungOut now

    A good example of "Fully Managed" coding

    M N 2 Replies Last reply
    0
    • C ColinDavies

      The idea that there are CPians in the unemployment lines sucks, Big time. So here is a age old idea, for getting that job that you have always wanted. 1. Make a short list of Companies you would like to work for ! 2. Investigate those companies, find out what they are all about, where there markets are, what technology they use, And most importantly who really matters in that company. 3. Investigate who really matters in that company, finding out all sorts of info and especially social habits. 4. Employ an escort. ( " I know what you are thinking and you are wrong. " ) The escort must be neck twistingly attractive to your target who. 5. Be alongside your escort when he/she bumps into your target who. 6. If you have done your investigation correctly your target who will listen to your plight while never breaking eye contact with your escort. 7. Start your new dream job the following day. :-) Has anyone else got any ideas to help out fellow CPians looking for employment ? Regardz Colin J Davies

      Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

      I live in Bob's HungOut now

      A good example of "Fully Managed" coding

      M Offline
      M Offline
      Michael Dunn
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Colin Davies wrote: 4. Employ an escort. Where would Mr. Outlaw Programmer find a goat escort? And would the investigation steps include finding out what goats the target person finds attractive? :-D --Mike-- My really out-of-date homepage Buffy's on. Gotta go, bye! Sonork - 100.10414 AcidHelm Big fan of Alyson Hannigan.

      C R 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • M Michael Dunn

        Colin Davies wrote: 4. Employ an escort. Where would Mr. Outlaw Programmer find a goat escort? And would the investigation steps include finding out what goats the target person finds attractive? :-D --Mike-- My really out-of-date homepage Buffy's on. Gotta go, bye! Sonork - 100.10414 AcidHelm Big fan of Alyson Hannigan.

        C Offline
        C Offline
        ColinDavies
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Michael Dunn wrote: Where would Mr. Outlaw Programmer find a goat escort? And would the investigation steps include finding out what goats the target person finds attractive? Interesting point Michael, It's not who you find attractive, but who your prospective employer finds attractive. Possibly Mr Outlaw programmer has Dial-A-Goat memorized, but in this instance it probably won't help him, unless of course he's applying for a job in Mr Wluffs hometown. The real point I'm trying to make is its not what you know but who you know or who your escort bumps into. :-) Regardz Colin J Davies

        Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

        I live in Bob's HungOut now

        A good example of "Fully Managed" coding

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • C ColinDavies

          The idea that there are CPians in the unemployment lines sucks, Big time. So here is a age old idea, for getting that job that you have always wanted. 1. Make a short list of Companies you would like to work for ! 2. Investigate those companies, find out what they are all about, where there markets are, what technology they use, And most importantly who really matters in that company. 3. Investigate who really matters in that company, finding out all sorts of info and especially social habits. 4. Employ an escort. ( " I know what you are thinking and you are wrong. " ) The escort must be neck twistingly attractive to your target who. 5. Be alongside your escort when he/she bumps into your target who. 6. If you have done your investigation correctly your target who will listen to your plight while never breaking eye contact with your escort. 7. Start your new dream job the following day. :-) Has anyone else got any ideas to help out fellow CPians looking for employment ? Regardz Colin J Davies

          Sonork ID 100.9197:Colin

          I live in Bob's HungOut now

          A good example of "Fully Managed" coding

          N Offline
          N Offline
          Nish Nishant
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Colin Davies wrote: Has anyone else got any ideas to help out fellow CPians looking for employment ? If you figure out that the people who might interview you have a good sense of humor, then go to the interview, and pretend that you are under the mistaken impression that you have a cold and you are visiting the local doctor and tell them your symptoms :-) That should get you started. Then when you have all finished laughing the real interview can start, and you'll have the advantage that they already like you. Nish p.s. Do this only if you are really desperate. Sonork ID 100.9786 voidmain www.busterboy.org If you don't find me on CP, I'll be at Bob's HungOut

          N 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • M Michael Dunn

            Colin Davies wrote: 4. Employ an escort. Where would Mr. Outlaw Programmer find a goat escort? And would the investigation steps include finding out what goats the target person finds attractive? :-D --Mike-- My really out-of-date homepage Buffy's on. Gotta go, bye! Sonork - 100.10414 AcidHelm Big fan of Alyson Hannigan.

            R Offline
            R Offline
            Roger Wright new
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            I'll rent you a goat. Cheap. You pay shipping. Extra charge for air holes in the package.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • N Nish Nishant

              Colin Davies wrote: Has anyone else got any ideas to help out fellow CPians looking for employment ? If you figure out that the people who might interview you have a good sense of humor, then go to the interview, and pretend that you are under the mistaken impression that you have a cold and you are visiting the local doctor and tell them your symptoms :-) That should get you started. Then when you have all finished laughing the real interview can start, and you'll have the advantage that they already like you. Nish p.s. Do this only if you are really desperate. Sonork ID 100.9786 voidmain www.busterboy.org If you don't find me on CP, I'll be at Bob's HungOut

              N Offline
              N Offline
              NickLewis
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Go to an interview and answer every question with, "Cut the b*******t, give me the godamn job, I am the best.", in a Robert De Niro accent. Then laugh. If they laugh too, then you've lightened the mood and show that you are in a jovial frame of mind. Err, I haven't tried this but it might amuse them. Anyway, I know what its like to be out of work, I am at the moment.... sigh...

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