JOTD
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
:laugh: Regards, Nish
Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
The Ultimate Grid - The #1 MFC grid out there! -
KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
:laugh:
Found on Bash.org [erno] hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
hey, where'd you find that? Ive read the EXACT SAME THING, except in Russian. Whats teh source of this? rara avis in terris
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hey, where'd you find that? Ive read the EXACT SAME THING, except in Russian. Whats teh source of this? rara avis in terris
2ASoft wrote:
except in Russian
You have Wal*Mart in Russia? :omg: Marc Pensieve Functional Entanglement vs. Code Entanglement Static Classes Make For Rigid Architectures
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2ASoft wrote:
except in Russian
You have Wal*Mart in Russia? :omg: Marc Pensieve Functional Entanglement vs. Code Entanglement Static Classes Make For Rigid Architectures
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
Chadlling wrote:
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. ... 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
These are terrible ideas, chances are the if there is a wet floor sign its there for a reason. Also intentionally making a floor slippery is a stupid idea. Retail stores pay thousands in settlements each year because someone slipped-fell-sued. Those are not funny. The rest is pretty funny though Matt Newman
Even the very best tools in the hands of an idiot will produce something of little or no value. - Chris Meech on Idiots
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Chadlling wrote:
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. ... 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
These are terrible ideas, chances are the if there is a wet floor sign its there for a reason. Also intentionally making a floor slippery is a stupid idea. Retail stores pay thousands in settlements each year because someone slipped-fell-sued. Those are not funny. The rest is pretty funny though Matt Newman
Even the very best tools in the hands of an idiot will produce something of little or no value. - Chris Meech on Idiots
Well if you take this out of the contex of a joke: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. -Can cause a divorce. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. -Can cause the clerk to waste an exorcist`s time 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. -Can hide a thief in action in the background 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. -Can cause a spy to shoot you 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" -can cause a heart attack But the rest is pretty funny! :-O
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2ASoft wrote:
except in Russian
You have Wal*Mart in Russia? :omg: Marc Pensieve Functional Entanglement vs. Code Entanglement Static Classes Make For Rigid Architectures
No, no we dont. But we do have something similar (basically a huge store). But if I were to translate that from Russian to English, or the other way around, I wouldve used Wlmart for the English version. so yeah. rara avis in terris
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
Chadlling wrote:
Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
:laugh:
Chadlling wrote:
Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
:confused: WTF is "lay away"?
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Chadlling wrote:
Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
:laugh:
Chadlling wrote:
Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
:confused: WTF is "lay away"?
I'm guessing it means to take out a loan or hire purchase agreement. ColinMackay.net Scottish Developers are looking for speakers for user group sessions over the next few months. Do you want to know more?
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KEEPING YOURSELF BUSY AT WALMART 15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ! ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" ( And; last, but not least!) 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"