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Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Soapbox
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  • S Slacker007

    Here I sit, broken-hearted, Had to shit but only farted.

    Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
    "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)

    N Offline
    N Offline
    NickPace
    wrote on last edited by
    #7

    ...Then one day I had my chance. Tried to fart, but shit my pants.

    -NP Never underestimate the creativity of the end-user.

    H S 2 Replies Last reply
    0
    • realJSOPR realJSOP

      And: "If you promise not to throw cigarette butts into the toilet, we promise not to piss in your ashtray."

      ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
      -----
      You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
      -----
      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

      G Offline
      G Offline
      GenJerDan
      wrote on last edited by
      #8

      And please don't eat the giant mints.

      So I rounded up my camel Just to ask him for a smoke He handed me a Lucky, I said "Hey, you missed the joke." My Mu[sic] My Films My Windows Programs, etc.

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      • S Slacker007

        Here I sit, broken-hearted, Had to shit but only farted.

        Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
        "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)

        L Offline
        L Offline
        Lost User
        wrote on last edited by
        #9

        Here you have one that you will not understand without a little help: Auf diesem Klo wohnt ein Geist, der jedem, der zu lange scheißt, von unten in die Eier beißt. Mich hat er noch nicht gebissen, denn ich hab' ihn einfach vollgeschissen. Edit: Don't use the Google translator, it failed miserably

        And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
        "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

        And I smiled and was happy
        And it came worse.

        S 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • realJSOPR realJSOP

          And: "If you promise not to throw cigarette butts into the toilet, we promise not to piss in your ashtray."

          ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
          -----
          You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
          -----
          "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

          Mike HankeyM Offline
          Mike HankeyM Offline
          Mike Hankey
          wrote on last edited by
          #10

          Hadn't heard that one.

          Visual Studio Task List on Steriods - VS2010/AVR Studio 5.0 ToDo Manager Extension

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          • N NickPace

            ...Then one day I had my chance. Tried to fart, but shit my pants.

            -NP Never underestimate the creativity of the end-user.

            H Offline
            H Offline
            hoernchenmeister
            wrote on last edited by
            #11

            Ah... you "sharted"....

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • N NickPace

              ...Then one day I had my chance. Tried to fart, but shit my pants.

              -NP Never underestimate the creativity of the end-user.

              S Offline
              S Offline
              Slacker007
              wrote on last edited by
              #12

              :thumbsup:

              Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
              "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • S Slacker007

                Here I sit, broken-hearted, Had to shit but only farted.

                Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
                "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)

                G Offline
                G Offline
                gavindon
                wrote on last edited by
                #13

                From the wall of a porta john some years ago on a construction site. " I've sh*t in England I've sh*t in France But before I sh*t here again I'll sh*t my pants..."

                Let's face it, after Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF! Be careful which toes you step on today, they might be connected to the foot that kicks your butt tomorrow. You can't scare me, I have children.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • C Chandrasekharan P

                  Sign posted in a bathroom: We aim to please! You aim too! Please!

                  Every new day is another chance to change your life.

                  J Offline
                  J Offline
                  J Dunlap
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #14

                  They have that at Red Rock Coffee[^] in Mountain View... makes me chuckle when I see it. (Awesome coffee shop btw - seems like 3/4 of the people there are devs, and they often have live music from local bands.)

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • L Lost User

                    Here you have one that you will not understand without a little help: Auf diesem Klo wohnt ein Geist, der jedem, der zu lange scheißt, von unten in die Eier beißt. Mich hat er noch nicht gebissen, denn ich hab' ihn einfach vollgeschissen. Edit: Don't use the Google translator, it failed miserably

                    And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
                    "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

                    And I smiled and was happy
                    And it came worse.

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    sucram
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #15

                    Verry funny. Got my 5.

                    If only closed minds would come with closed mouths. Ego non sum semper iustus tamen Ego sum nunquam nefas!

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                      Another one is "Please do not throw cigarette butts in the urinal! They are to hard to light when wet."

                      Visual Studio Task List on Steriods - VS2010/AVR Studio 5.0 ToDo Manager Extension

                      D Offline
                      D Offline
                      David C Hobbyist
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #16

                      One I read at a public pool when I was young "Please don't pee in Our pool we wont swim in your toilet. :)

                      Frazzle the name say's it all

                      Mike HankeyM R S 3 Replies Last reply
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                      • D David C Hobbyist

                        One I read at a public pool when I was young "Please don't pee in Our pool we wont swim in your toilet. :)

                        Frazzle the name say's it all

                        Mike HankeyM Offline
                        Mike HankeyM Offline
                        Mike Hankey
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #17

                        Yeah I remember that one from when I was young.

                        Visual Studio Task List on Steriods - VS2010/AVR Studio 5.0 ToDo Manager Extension

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                        • D David C Hobbyist

                          One I read at a public pool when I was young "Please don't pee in Our pool we wont swim in your toilet. :)

                          Frazzle the name say's it all

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          RJOberg
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #18

                          I always saw "Welcome to our ool. Notice there is no 'p' in it. Please keep it that way."

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                          • D David C Hobbyist

                            One I read at a public pool when I was young "Please don't pee in Our pool we wont swim in your toilet. :)

                            Frazzle the name say's it all

                            S Offline
                            S Offline
                            Sandesh M Patil
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #19

                            :laugh:

                            Cheers,
                            SMP

                            My Recent Article
                            Task List feature of Visual Studio framework

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