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  4. How'd you die?

How'd you die?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Soapbox
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  • R Offline
    R Offline
    Ra one
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Two men waiting at the pearly gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second. :confused: "I froze to death," says the second. :-O "That's awful, how does it feel to freeze to death?" says the first. :^) "It's very uncomfortable at first, you get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How did you die?" says the second. :wtf: "I had a heart attack", says the first guy. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, bot no one was hiding there. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." :( The second man shakes his head. "that's so ironic" he says. :sigh: "What do you mean?" asks the first man :confused: "If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive." :((

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    • R Ra one

      Two men waiting at the pearly gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second. :confused: "I froze to death," says the second. :-O "That's awful, how does it feel to freeze to death?" says the first. :^) "It's very uncomfortable at first, you get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How did you die?" says the second. :wtf: "I had a heart attack", says the first guy. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, bot no one was hiding there. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." :( The second man shakes his head. "that's so ironic" he says. :sigh: "What do you mean?" asks the first man :confused: "If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive." :((

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Where did you meet my grandfather? That was one of his favorite jokes. :)

      And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
      "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

      And I smiled and was happy
      And it came worse.

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      • L Lost User

        Where did you meet my grandfather? That was one of his favorite jokes. :)

        And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
        "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

        And I smiled and was happy
        And it came worse.

        K Offline
        K Offline
        Keith Barrow
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        CDP1802 wrote:

        That was one of his favorite jokes.

        Of course it was, his granfather told it to him :laugh:

        Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
        -Or-
        A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

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        • K Keith Barrow

          CDP1802 wrote:

          That was one of his favorite jokes.

          Of course it was, his granfather told it to him :laugh:

          Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
          -Or-
          A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

          L Offline
          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          I suspect there were already versions of this joke among the Roman soldiers when they boarded their ships to conquer Brittania. Edit: They did not have any freezers then, so one of the two men probably drowned in the cloaca maxima :)

          And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
          "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

          And I smiled and was happy
          And it came worse.

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          • L Lost User

            Where did you meet my grandfather? That was one of his favorite jokes. :)

            And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
            "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

            And I smiled and was happy
            And it came worse.

            F Offline
            F Offline
            Freak30
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            I have heard a different version of the joke. In that one there were three men involed and it took place in a high building. The first man was the husband who suspected his wife of having an affair. He came home and found someone clinging to the outside of the balcony. So hit his hands until the other man let go. Luckily there was a bush below and the other one survived with minor bruises. So the husband grabbed the freezer and threw it down onto the man him killing him. Then he died from a heart attack from the act of lifting the heavy freezer. The second man was the lover sitting in the freezer when it was thrown. And finally the third man was a worker on the roof who fell down but managed to grab hold of the balcony.

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            • L Lost User

              Where did you meet my grandfather? That was one of his favorite jokes. :)

              And from the clouds a mighty voice spoke:
              "Smile and be happy, for it could come worse!"

              And I smiled and was happy
              And it came worse.

              T Offline
              T Offline
              thatraja
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              CDP1802 wrote:

              Where When did you meet my grandfather? That was one of his favorite jokes. :)

              FTFY

              thatraja


              My Dad had a Heart Attack on this day so don't...
              Pompeyboy3 here
              | Nobody remains a virgin, Life screws everyone :sigh:

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