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  3. What are your worthless skills?

What are your worthless skills?

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  • F Fabio Franco

    Me too :) Also can stretch and shrink my nose holes. And move only one eye brow at a time in both sides and I crack pretty much every bone in my body.

    To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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    AspDotNetDev
    wrote on last edited by
    #36

    Hopefully none of my coworkers are looking at me. I'm trying all this stuff out right now. :-D

    Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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    • A AspDotNetDev

      I have been waiting years for Merriam-Webster to come out with a 12th edition of their dictionary. I have the 11th edition dictionary, and it came with software. Really useful in theory, but very poor execution. I'm hoping the next version of the software won't suck. I would write it myself if I could get a hold of a recent collection of dictionary data (words, definitions, pronunciations, etymology, synonyms, sample usage, sound files, image files, and so on).

      Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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      Kenneth Haugland
      wrote on last edited by
      #37

      Must exist somewhere, wouldnt you think? But I have been suprised before, that things I expect to find simply does not exist, or that they are so expencive that I dont know what to say. I guess you could make adobe read the word to you. Perhaps microsoft speech could do that too.

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      • A AspDotNetDev

        Hopefully none of my coworkers are looking at me. I'm trying all this stuff out right now. :-D

        Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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        Fabio Franco
        wrote on last edited by
        #38

        LOL You could also try moving the ribs like flapping wings, so far I've never met anyone besides my brother that can do it... I wonder if this freak of nature is only in my family.

        To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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        • F Fabio Franco

          LOL You could also try moving the ribs like flapping wings, so far I've never met anyone besides my brother that can do it... I wonder if this freak of nature is only in my family.

          To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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          AspDotNetDev
          wrote on last edited by
          #39

          I think I'll wait until I get home. That will require a little shirtless mirror time. :-O :laugh:

          Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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          • A AspDotNetDev

            I think I'll wait until I get home. That will require a little shirtless mirror time. :-O :laugh:

            Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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            Fabio Franco
            wrote on last edited by
            #40

            AspDotNetDev wrote:

            I think I'll wait until I get home.

            Good Idea.

            To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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            • A AspDotNetDev

              Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

              the value of Pi to ten places

              I think I know pi to around 23 places. Let's see... 3.1415926535897962684323 And the actual digits are... 3.1415926535897932384626 Darn, I always mix up the "323" and "626".

              Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

              RaviBeeR Offline
              RaviBeeR Offline
              RaviBee
              wrote on last edited by
              #41

              AspDotNetDev wrote:

              to around 23 places

              That's impressive. :cool: /ravi

              My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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              • F Fabio Franco

                While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                wizardzz
                wrote on last edited by
                #42

                Comedy. It has only cost me money.

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                • F Fabio Franco

                  While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                  To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                  Roger Wright
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #43

                  I can execute a fairly decent spinning jump hook kick, shatter 2" ~ 3" of lumber, and land on my feet most of the time, which isn't bad for an old fart. But it's quite worthless, as I've never been attacked by lumber. Well... other than that one time I attempted to build a deck in a windstorm. :-O

                  Will Rogers never met me.

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                  • W wizardzz

                    Comedy. It has only cost me money.

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                    BillWoodruff
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #44

                    Bravo, WizardZZ, that gets my vote for the "Stephen Wright" award of the week. Also reminds me of the place in the play "Comedians," by the late Joe Orton, where the older comedian says: "the essence of humor is that somebody else qets hurt." I am quoting from memory here based on seeing a live performance of that play in Washington, D.C. in 1977 or 1978, with Robert Prosky as the lead (Prosky went on to national fame on U.S. TV as the second sergeant on the "Hill Street Blues" series): so I may not have got the quote exactly right. Much better, I think than Freud's statement (1916): "The essence of humor is that one spares oneself the affects to which the situation would naturally give rise and overrides with a jest the possibility of such an emotional display. Freud, S. (1916)" On the hand Freud did get off a zinger (what Mark Twain would have called a "snapper") when he was required by the Nazis, to get permission to emigrate (after intervention by very powerful Austrians), to make a statement that he was treated fairly. His comment was: "I can recommend the Gestapo to everyone." best, Bill

                    "One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us." Kurt Vonnegut

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                    • F Fabio Franco

                      While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                      To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                      Ron Anders
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #45

                      I a musician Drums, Bass Lead and rhythm guitar. Better than average songwriter. Useless.

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                      • R Ron Anders

                        I a musician Drums, Bass Lead and rhythm guitar. Better than average songwriter. Useless.

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                        Fabio Franco
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #46

                        C'mon you could still use your skills to entertain your friends or even give a little hand to score with the ladies (if applicable) :)

                        To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                        • F Fabio Franco

                          C'mon you could still use your skills to entertain your friends or even give a little hand to score with the ladies (if applicable) :)

                          To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                          James ODonnell
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #47

                          Fabio Franco wrote:

                          score with the ladies (if applicable)

                          :wtf:

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                          • F Fabio Franco

                            While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                            To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                            BillWoodruff
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #48

                            Now that my days as sexual athlete, and orgiophantic virtuoso, seem over, I'd have to say my most worthless skills, excepting my bogus modesty, are in devising esoteric off-topic digressions which contain over-elaborated self-referentiality, literary quotes and japes, obscure sub-textuality, and archaic or out-moded vocabulary, as if were I were an architect designing twisted mirrors for fun-house add-ons to funeral-parlors. Perhaps that's why I feel a certain "kindred spirit" bond with DD, although DD's advanced abilities as a cunning linguist hierophant of the gustatory, and olfactory, senses, in the context of bibuolosity, are, ipso dipsomaniacal: nonpareil. Well, those are my latest lame excuses. As Groucho said: "these are my principles; if you don't like them: I've got others."

                            "One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us." Kurt Vonnegut

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                            • F Fabio Franco

                              While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                              To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                              leppie
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #49

                              Kicking with my left foot or throwing with my left arm. ;p

                              IronScheme
                              ((λ (x) `(,x ',x)) '(λ (x) `(,x ',x)))

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                              • A AspDotNetDev

                                Canadia is cheaper to visit. Last time I was up there, the only thing I recognized was poutine. :)

                                Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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                                Wendelius
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #50

                                That looks actually really good.

                                The need to optimize rises from a bad design.My articles[^]

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                                • F Fabio Franco

                                  Anna-Jayne Metcalfe wrote:

                                  Sword, dagger and halberd fighting spring to mind.

                                  That sounds really cool. And I don't think it's that useless. It's exercise, unless you think exercise is useless...

                                  To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                                  Anna Jayne Metcalfe
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #51

                                  It's great exercise if you have the right fighting partners and the appropriate insurance in place - which I don't here in Bournemouth (my old group is 50 miles away). So, that's all been on the back burner for years. At the moment I use running as a form of exercise, which seems to work well and is strangely addictive.

                                  Anna :rose: Tech Blog | Visual Lint "Why would anyone prefer to wield a weapon that takes both hands at once, when they could use a lighter (and obviously superior) weapon that allows you to wield multiple ones at a time, and thus supports multi-paradigm carnage?"

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                                  • F Fabio Franco

                                    While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                                    To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

                                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                                    OriginalGriff
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #52

                                    Since I was bitten by a radioactive teddy bear, I have developed a number of Useless Skills: 1) I can communicate with fruit. 2) I can read my own mind. 3) I have invisible handwriting. And last, but not least: 4) I can detect human stupidity!

                                    Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water

                                    "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                                    "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

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                                    • F Fabio Franco

                                      While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                                      To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                                      Joan M
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #53

                                      I can lick my elbow. How many of you have tried it?

                                      [www.tamautomation.com] Robots, CNC and PLC machines for grinding and polishing.

                                      https://www.robotecnik.com freelance robots, PLC and CNC programmer.

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                                      • A Anna Jayne Metcalfe

                                        Sword, dagger and halberd fighting spring to mind. Not much call for those skills these days (if I ever have to use those skills in anger, you can guarantee I won't have the equipment with me at the time...). Then there's being capable of walking or cycling significant distances without listening to music. That seems to be a bit of a lost art here in Bournemouth.

                                        Anna :rose: Tech Blog | Visual Lint "Why would anyone prefer to wield a weapon that takes both hands at once, when they could use a lighter (and obviously superior) weapon that allows you to wield multiple ones at a time, and thus supports multi-paradigm carnage?"

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                                        Gary R Wheeler
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #54

                                        Anna-Jayne Metcalfe wrote:

                                        Sword, dagger and halberd fighting spring to mind

                                        Should you and Beth ever go full-bore corporate, this skill will come in handy for keeping the sales and marketing mucks in line. I've always thought they performed better with an edged weapon to their throats.

                                        Anna-Jayne Metcalfe wrote:

                                        Then there's being capable of walking or cycling significant distances without listening to music

                                        Good for you! I've never been able to do that myself. I hate ear buds, and running with full cup headphones is just silly. Besides, there's the whole not-being-able-to-hear-the-truck-bearing-down-on-you thing.

                                        Software Zen: delete this;

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                                        • F Fabio Franco

                                          While I was running up the stairs some minutes ago, something that I usually find myself thinking is that I have several skills that are really worthless. For example, I am very good at walking and running silently. And they are worthless because: 1 - I'm not a criminal 2 - The job market for Ninjas is really low nowadays. I have many skills that I'm really good at but are worthless because they don't matter anymore or it makes no difference in my life or in other people's lives. What are your worthless skills?

                                          To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson ---- Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia

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                                          G Offline
                                          Gary R Wheeler
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #55

                                          I can quote lines from movies I no longer remember or haven't even seen. In a sub-worthless skill, I can quote a significant amount of Monty Python material, despite never actually having seen the show.

                                          Software Zen: delete this;

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