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  3. Ignorance is power

Ignorance is power

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  • M Mirza Ghalib

    Francis Bacon was so wrong when he said "knowledge is power", in today's pc and dumb people friendly workplace, ignorance is power. The less you know, the more people bend over backwards trying to explain things to you. More stress you inflict on other people, the stronger your power over them. I was unaware of this until a few years ago, until my spiritual guru revealed this truth to me and opened the gateway to eternal happiness. This was circa 2003. A new CIO had been appointed. Beefy bloke from Newzealand and blond too. He decided our company was getting stale and needed fresh blood. He brought in a lot of people who had absolutely no background in IT or had any previous experience in our business domain. All of them as project managers and senior business analysts. And the fun started. One day my boss called me in and said "Ghalib you going to help Tiffany with her new project. Show her the ropes. If the project fails I will hold you responsible". Lady in question was a blonde from Germany and a cat lover to boot. I consulted by spiritual guru "Oh wise one! This woman is going to torture me to death. What do I do". The wise one said "Man, play dumb". So I started off saying things like "What's XML?" at meetings. "You haven't heard of XML?" "Nope! never heard of it". Score me = 1, cat lover = 0. Predictably, the project collapsed before much money could be spent on it. But, I was on to a good thing. I perfected this to a fine art. I did so well at it that I was soon promoted. I have often found solutions to perplexing problems in CP, so I love you guys and would like to share this valuable secret with you :- "when nothing works, play dumb" :cool:

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #12

    Mirza Ghalib wrote:

    play dumb

    I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about :-O

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

      I'm sure you rise to the occasion.

      The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

      R Offline
      R Offline
      Rage
      wrote on last edited by
      #13

      It is hard not to.

      ~RaGE();

      I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

      OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • M Mirza Ghalib

        Francis Bacon was so wrong when he said "knowledge is power", in today's pc and dumb people friendly workplace, ignorance is power. The less you know, the more people bend over backwards trying to explain things to you. More stress you inflict on other people, the stronger your power over them. I was unaware of this until a few years ago, until my spiritual guru revealed this truth to me and opened the gateway to eternal happiness. This was circa 2003. A new CIO had been appointed. Beefy bloke from Newzealand and blond too. He decided our company was getting stale and needed fresh blood. He brought in a lot of people who had absolutely no background in IT or had any previous experience in our business domain. All of them as project managers and senior business analysts. And the fun started. One day my boss called me in and said "Ghalib you going to help Tiffany with her new project. Show her the ropes. If the project fails I will hold you responsible". Lady in question was a blonde from Germany and a cat lover to boot. I consulted by spiritual guru "Oh wise one! This woman is going to torture me to death. What do I do". The wise one said "Man, play dumb". So I started off saying things like "What's XML?" at meetings. "You haven't heard of XML?" "Nope! never heard of it". Score me = 1, cat lover = 0. Predictably, the project collapsed before much money could be spent on it. But, I was on to a good thing. I perfected this to a fine art. I did so well at it that I was soon promoted. I have often found solutions to perplexing problems in CP, so I love you guys and would like to share this valuable secret with you :- "when nothing works, play dumb" :cool:

        M Offline
        M Offline
        Maximilien
        wrote on last edited by
        #14

        Mirza Ghalib wrote:

        "Ghalib you going to help Tiffany with her new project. Show her the ropes. If the project fails I will hold you responsible".

        I would have quit at that point. :|

        I'd rather be phishing!

        L 2 Replies Last reply
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        • R Rage

          It is hard not to.

          ~RaGE();

          I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriff
          wrote on last edited by
          #15

          I'm sure it's a stiff challenge...

          The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

          "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
          "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

          R 1 Reply Last reply
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          • L Lost User

            Making it obvious by your reply to a post, that the joke went over your head is worse.

            K Offline
            K Offline
            Kenneth Haugland
            wrote on last edited by
            #16

            What joke?

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

              I'm sure it's a stiff challenge...

              The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

              R Offline
              R Offline
              Rage
              wrote on last edited by
              #17

              Yeah, but I have been successful so far. I am knocking on wood.

              ~RaGE();

              I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

              C 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • M Maximilien

                Mirza Ghalib wrote:

                "Ghalib you going to help Tiffany with her new project. Show her the ropes. If the project fails I will hold you responsible".

                I would have quit at that point. :|

                I'd rather be phishing!

                L Offline
                L Offline
                Lost User
                wrote on last edited by
                #18

                I'd see what happens first. It's often an empty threat.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • R Rage

                  Yeah, but I have been successful so far. I am knocking on wood.

                  ~RaGE();

                  I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                  C Offline
                  C Offline
                  charlieg
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #19

                  You guys are great! I saw the comment about the german girl and thought, "Here we go...". You did not disappoint.

                  Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759

                  R 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • C charlieg

                    You guys are great! I saw the comment about the german girl and thought, "Here we go...". You did not disappoint.

                    Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759

                    R Offline
                    R Offline
                    Rage
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #20

                    I think you nailed it.

                    ~RaGE();

                    I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                    L OriginalGriffO 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • R Rage

                      I think you nailed it.

                      ~RaGE();

                      I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                      L Offline
                      L Offline
                      loctrice
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #21

                      talk about the elephant in the room

                      Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

                      K C 2 Replies Last reply
                      0
                      • L loctrice

                        talk about the elephant in the room

                        Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

                        K Offline
                        K Offline
                        Kenneth Haugland
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #22

                        Perhaps the GOP has several meanings...

                        B 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • M Maximilien

                          Mirza Ghalib wrote:

                          "Ghalib you going to help Tiffany with her new project. Show her the ropes. If the project fails I will hold you responsible".

                          I would have quit at that point. :|

                          I'd rather be phishing!

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #23

                          Maximilien wrote:

                          I would have quit at that point.

                          And yet he turned it into a promotion. You've much to learn, young grasshopper.

                          K 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L loctrice

                            talk about the elephant in the room

                            Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

                            C Offline
                            C Offline
                            Corporal Agarn
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #24

                            I wish I could give you a ten! :thumbsup:

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • R Rage

                              I think you nailed it.

                              ~RaGE();

                              I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                              OriginalGriffO Offline
                              OriginalGriffO Offline
                              OriginalGriff
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #25

                              I was going to continue, but it's long enough now.

                              The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

                              "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                              "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                              L 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                I'm sure you rise to the occasion.

                                The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

                                J Offline
                                J Offline
                                Jorgen Andersson
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #26

                                I have. I married one. :-D

                                Be excellent to each other. And... PARTY ON, DUDES! Abraham Lincoln

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                  I was going to continue, but it's long enough now.

                                  The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

                                  L Offline
                                  L Offline
                                  loctrice
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #27

                                  your stretching the truth

                                  Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

                                  OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L loctrice

                                    your stretching the truth

                                    Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

                                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                                    OriginalGriff
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #28

                                    Pen is mightier than sword!

                                    The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

                                    "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                                    "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                                    L P M 3 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                      Pen is mightier than sword!

                                      The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

                                      L Offline
                                      L Offline
                                      loctrice
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #29

                                      that one's a flop

                                      Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                        Pen is mightier than sword!

                                        The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.

                                        P Offline
                                        P Offline
                                        piyush_singh
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #30

                                        Nowadays you can also say that the keyboard is mightier than the Pen!! ;)

                                        Piyush K Singh

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • R Rage

                                          Well, my behaviour towards blonde German girls is quite a different one.

                                          ~RaGE();

                                          I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                                          M Offline
                                          M Offline
                                          Mark_Wallace
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #31

                                          Didn't they take out an injunction against you? All of 'em?

                                          I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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